Tuesday marked Steve Spurrier’s 23rd appearance at the SEC’s Media Days convocation, easily a record. Every Spurrier appearance is, as everyone knows, hugely anticipated because he’s Spurrier, who speaks in a way no football coach ever has.
But we are, I fear, approaching that point where Spurrier is known more as a dispenser of arch observations than as a winner of games, and he has been — this point is beyond argument — the greatest non-Alabama coach in SEC history. He turned 70 in April, and even Bear Bryant retired at 69.
Beyond numerical age, there’s creeping reality: South Carolina, which Spurrier through force of will pushed to the cusp of an SEC title, appears in decline. After taking the East in 2010 and finishing in the top 10 each of the next three seasons, the Gamecocks finished 7-6 in 2014 and had to win the motley Independence Bowl to break .500. At these Media Days, there’s a chance they’ll be picked to finish fifth in the seven-team division.
As incongruous as it sounds, Spurrier credits the trip to Shreveport with rejuvenating his program. “I’ve learned a lot better appreciation for all the bowl games. Everybody can’t play in the SEC Championship game. … When you watch the team that wins celebrate — you watch Wisconsin in the Capital One, the Gators in that Birmingham Bowl and us in the Independence — I’ll tell you, it’s a thrill to win that last game.”
It must be noted that Spurrier once denigrated Tennessee by saying of the bowl now known as the Capital One, “you can’t spell Citrus without ‘U-T.’” It should also be noted that the kinder, gentler Evil Genius didn’t let the latter-day Volunteers pass without mention.
“We were 7-6, same as Tennessee and the same as Arkansas,” he said, “and they’re sort of celebrating big seasons. So we were celebrating also. We were doing some cartwheels and high-fiving after that Independence Bowl game because it was a year that could have gone real south.”
But now we ask: What if 2015 does go south? Will Spurrier hang around for another try? Two more tries? Five more? A man who tracks the Gamecocks believes Spurrier would have retired had last year’s team beaten Clemson, but there was no way the Ol’ Ball Coach wanted to quit on a loss to Dabo Swinney.
Spurrier: “Somebody said, ‘Why are you still coaching?’ I said, ‘Well, I forgot to get fired, and I’m not going to cheat.’ That’s about the way you lose your job.”
Asked if he had an exit strategy, Spurrier said: “I breezed right through age 60, breezed right through 65, and I’m going to try my best to breeze right on through 70. I can still remember just about everything. So mentally, I think I’m the same as I was. We got two people running for president — Hillary and Donald Trump are both 69, I believe. (Hillary Clinton is 67.) Coach K at Duke, he’s still doing pretty good at, I think, 69. (Actually 68.) So the age really doesn’t mean a lot. It’s whether you can function physically, emotionally, mentally, get your team ready to play.”
Then: “That retirement thing, I don’t think I’d be very good at it. I can go to the beach and stay four or five days, and (then it’s), ‘Hey, let’s get on out of here. We’ve been here long enough.’ ”
Then: “We’ve got some coaches in our league who may go to the NFL someday. There’s no guarantee they’re going to be at this school (with) the way some of those NFL teams can offer $15 million, $20 million a year. If one of them offered (that to Alabama’s Nick) Saban, it would make that $7.2 million look paltry to him, probably.”
Then: “I wish Danny Sheridan did the odds on every coach being there four years from now. It would be something fun to bet on. Who would be here four years from now? I don’t know. Just something to think about. What I’m trying to say is you don’t know what’s going to happen down the road.”
True. But the thought of the great Spurrier hanging around just to win Independence Bowls would be kind of pitiful, and being pitied is one thing this proud man could never abide. Maybe he’ll make it to a 24th round of Media Days. I’d be surprised if he hits 25.
