Merry Pope of Decatur discovered the need for someone who understands to talk to – someone to share one’s grief – when a certain, not uncommon, tragedy strikes.
“You don’t really realize how emotional it is until you go through it yourself,” she said of her three miscarriages. “And there are not a lot of organizations out there helping families through this crisis.”
That’s when Pope said she learned of the TEARS Foundation, a nonprofit founded in 2002 by Sarah Slack of Washington state who had had a stillborn son. The group provides emotional support and, if necessary, financial aid for those who have lost children in infancy or to stillbirths and miscarriages.
“I reached out to TEARS because I was looking for some way to get involved and help other families get through their loss,” Pope said. Hers was one of four families that started the Georgia chapter in 2015.
Staffed by volunteers, the chapter raises funds through the year – it has an annual walk coming up in the spring – and has paid funeral expenses for about 100 families to date. Its signature achievement of the past year was the Sept. 30 unveiling of an “Angel of Hope” at Arlington Memorial Park in Sandy Springs.
The three-piece stone monument and its site were donated by Dignity Memorial, the funeral home and cemetery network. It stands about 5 feet tall. An angel holds a baby, and two butterfly wings on each side are engraved with the names of more than 60 children. It is one of six Angels installed to date by local chapters around the country.
“Hope is an elusive word when your baby dies/Chasing after unanswered questions/But slowly Hope appears,” the inscription begins.
“It’s special because it’s the only (monument) of its kind in Georgia, a place where people can have their babies’ names engraved,” Pope said. “As we’ve formed chapters, people have wanted one of these for their own states.
“A lot of families such as mine don’t have a permanent place to memorialize their children. A lot of people who have stillborn children or miscarriages don’t necessarily have a grave.”
There’s room on the wings for additional names to be added as they are received; this probably will be done twice a year, Pope said. The engraving fee is $250. TEARS offers to assist families who can’t afford it.
The group also extends emotional support. Some local chapter members have had training to help families, talking to them “one on one, over the phone or by email, however the family wants to be engaged,” Pope said.
Nationally, the TEARS Foundation website says the 501(c)3 organization has given emotional and financial support to thousands of families. The group also offers infant funeral services, from 20 weeks’ gestation to one year old. It is active here and in parts or all of 19 other states, Puerto Rico and the Bahamas, Belize and Uganda.
The Georgia Chapter has a Facebook page. Additional information is available at: http://bit.ly/2fo6tTz
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