Very sadly, we live in a world full of flakes. What’s at play here? Technology. You can cancel on someone without seeing their reaction or even giving a reason. But remember that there is an actual person at the end of the phone. A person who has set aside some time in their life to meet you. Sure, there are valid reasons to cancel, but even if you have one, remember that your time is no more valuable than someone else’s.
Here are some rules:
1. If you need to cancel within two hours before the date, call the person. Yes, call. If it’s more than that, you can send a text. But follow up to make sure the other person received it.
2. If you’re canceling and you still want to see the other person, then propose a new date at the time of the cancellation.
3. Add “I’m sorry” into any cancellation. Those words go a long way.
Whether it’s canceling on someone at the last minute, which so many of my dates and my clients’ dates have done, or ghosting, remember that no matter what you call them, they are still bad behaviors.
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Erika Ettin is the founder of A Little Nudge, where she helps others navigate the often intimidating world of online dating.