My thermostat was bumping itself up to 85 degrees each day, so I consulted the manual, but it was as confusing as an ancient Greek manuscript — and left me clueless.
Then the sound system broke on my DVD player, so I ordered a new one, but didn’t even open the box when it arrived, since the prospect of installing it was daunting.
These are just a few examples of the practical problems widows wrangle with on a daily basis. The batteries need changing in the smoke alarms, but some folks, like me, aren’t keen on climbing ladders. There’s an odd clanking sound in the car, but is it serious or not?
Fortunately, fellows from the Knights of Columbus, a Catholic fraternal and charitable organization, have come to my rescue. These groups of laymen are stationed at many parishes in the Archdiocese of Atlanta and throughout the nation.
The Knights of Columbus, which began in New Haven, Connecticut, in 1892, raise money nationally for disaster relief, food banks, ultrasound machines, persecuted Christians in the Middle East and orphaned children in Uganda and Kenya, among other causes.
It’s not just about money, though, because the men routinely pray together and generously donate time to help others. For example, Knights who serve at St. Thomas More Catholic Church are renovating a building that will become a safe house for women who’ve been rescued from sex trafficking.
The Knights historically have a special ministry to widows and orphans, so when I sent an email asking for help, a Knight cheerfully arrived at my house and worked on the thermostat and the sound system.
The Bible has many passages about helping widows and orphans, such as the words from St. James: “Religion that God our father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress.”
I’m guessing there are many widows nodding their heads and saying, “I need help too!” Sometimes it might be a simple task, like giving advice about whether to buy a new dishwasher or call a repairman, and when to get new tires.
Does your church or synagogue have a team of men and women ready to help widows, starting with the initial shock of their husbands’ deaths? Many churches mercifully provide emotional and spiritual support during that crucial time, but may then assume widows are doing just fine.
Still, along with the emotional difficulties of being alone, there are the niggling practical matters that were handled by the spouse. In my case, my late husband was the chief computer and car guy, household repairman, yard man and financial guru.
I’m extremely grateful that friends and relatives helped me when the water heater broke, the windshield cracked, the faucet leaked and the printer died. They’ve also helped me haul my rambunctious tomcat to the vet’s office and cleared underbrush threatening to overtake the backyard. People from the churches I attend — and my readers — have rallied with prayers, the most precious gift of all.
I hope other churches and synagogues have volunteers ready to tackle practical matters for widows. Certain tasks, of course, require professional help, like putting on a new roof, but often the job is small, and the joy of having it done is immense.
“Blessed are they who mourn for they shall be comforted,” Jesus told us, and he was quick to help the widows he met.
In the Psalms, God is called a “father to the fatherless” and a “defender of widows.” We are the hands of God in the world, and through our love and mercy, he tenderly embraces and comforts those who face life alone.
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