The holidays are a time of cheer and celebration, of good spirits and familial camaraderie. However, the holiday hype can get to be too much, leading to pressure and stress, loneliness and depression. For many, the greatest challenge during this season is staying balanced.
According to Kathleen Hall, founder and CEO of the Stress Institute, “Stress is inextricably woven into the holiday celebration.”
For some it may be financial strain, the desire to give what others want, despite credit card debt and job loss. For others it may be familial discord and the pressure to include estranged in-laws and parents who don’t get along. Still more may be overwhelmed by travel plans, overcrowded airports and unhealthy food options along the way. And then there are those who have lost close family members or whose relationships are troubled and experience a deep loneliness.
But there are ways to cope.
“It’s important to assess what your particular sources of holiday stress may be,” said Gillian Green, who holds a Ph.D. in clinical psychology. “[Then] try to figure out what you can do to reduce the stressfulness of these sources.
“This may mean working on your approach to these sources — for example, reminding yourself that your child’s success in life does not depend on his getting a particular gift, even if he thinks it does — or changing what activities you engage in and how you engage in them.”
Heather Dickens, 28, an Atlanta art director, said she always feels pressured to find the perfect present for everyone on her list, so she plans ahead: making gift lists in advance, setting aside money as early as October and shopping online.
According to Hall, she’s doing the right thing. The best way to begin the holiday season is by making lists, she says, as the brain can be overwhelmed by too much information. She recommends taking advantage of smart phone applications and functions to store gift lists, grocery lists, recipes and more. This will cut down on multiple trips to the store.
Americans routinely overspend during the holidays. To avoid financial strain, Hall suggests creating a budget that includes food, gifts, travel, party clothes and decorations, and then sticking to it. Green agrees, noting that adults may decide to put a price cap on gifts throughout the family so no one feels cheated.
“I’m usually financially prepared, but family definitely stresses me out,” Dickens said. “Something about having everyone staying under one roof gets very hectic and I start to miss my much-valued alone time.”
Compounding the issue, Dickens and her husband make the rounds during the holidays, visiting three sets of parents, one of which requires a 13-hour car ride to Pennsylvania.
To make scheduling the visits easier, Hall suggests creating a family e-mail list. That way, family members can compare schedules and find out what they need to bring when visiting, such as pillows and blankets. Travelers should always bring their favorite music, movie, blanket or anything that comforts them anyway.
“Memorize stress-reduction techniques and teach them to others,” Hall said. “Keep a meditation app or affirmation app on your smart phone.”
Other stress-busting tips included exercise, such as walking up and down the airport concourse and stretching, packing healthy snacks like fruits and raw vegetables, and limiting alcohol and high-fat, sugary foods.
To avoid loneliness and depression, reach out to old friends, neighbors and relatives.
“We are less depressed when we are around those we love,” Hall said. Trying something new, such as a different way to decorate or a unique food, can help, too.
Another way to combat holiday depression is volunteering. Hall calls it “an instant pick-me-up.” Research shows that meeting like-minded people while helping those in need can improve your health.
“No matter the source of stress, managing holiday stressors is made easier by doing those things which generally support your body’s ability to regulate itself,” Green said. “The holidays are usually stressful, but each year we learn to take steps to manage it,” Dickens said.
Kathleen Hall, founder and CEO of the Stress Institute in Atlanta, shares tips for coping with holiday stress:
- Write it down. Make lists for everything from gifts to groceries.
- Budget. Create a budget and stick to it.
- Be prepared. Pack an extra change of clothes when traveling and check in before you get to the airport.
- Eat right. Make wise food choices, including omega-3s, vitamin B and spicy foods.
- Practice traditions. Enjoy old rituals but make an attempt to start new ones as well.
- Keep moving. Walk or do yoga to produce endorphins, the calming hormones.
- Get a "helper's high." Volunteer in your community.
- Use moderation. Maintain a majority of fruits and vegetables in your diet but don't skip foods that make you happy.
- Limit alcohol. Drink sparkling water with lime to create a sense of fullness.
- Surrender. Reacting to every obstacle will raise your blood pressure. Instead, surrender to holiday travel as a classroom and learn.
For more information, visit www.stressinstitute.com.
