Georgia military families, veterans, uneasy over Trump-Khan debates

Khizr Khan's assertion last week at the Democratic National Convention that Trump didn't understand the sacrifices others have made has touched a national debate. Were the Khans, who lost a son in Iraq 12 years ago, using a family tragedy to play politics? Or did Trump showcase an amazing lack of sensitivity in his responses to them?

To recap: In one of the signature moments of the DNC in Philadelphia, Khan took the lectern. Beside him was his wife, Ghazala. His son, Army Capt. Humayun Khan died 12 years ago in a suicide bombing in Baghdad. If Trump’s anti-immigrant policies had been in effect, the father told the crowd, the son never could have served.

In what would be a battle of words, Khan then aimed the verbal equivalent of a howitzer at Trump. “You have sacrificed nothing,” Khan said, “and no one.”

Thus began a spat that has lasted longer than the convention where it began. Some have suggested Trump's words could imperil the lock Republicans have traditionally held on the military vote.

For Bill Ayers of Snellville, the barrage of words have only pricked at a wound that never will fully heal. Eight years ago, his son, Arm Cpl. Jonathan Ayers, died in a firefight in Afghanistan. The younger of Bill and Suzanne Ayers' two sons, he was 24.

“The death of a son, it shapes the way you see your country,” said Ayers. “You have a deeper understanding of what losing someone means.”

He shares that with Khans, said Ayers. “He (Trump) doesn’t understand the depth of the loss,” said Ayers. “I know what it’s like.”

Trump, Ayers said, should have refrained from responding to the Khans’ criticisms. “I don’t know why he did that,” Ayers said. “To go after the parents of someone who lost a child, I don’t agree with that.”

Give Trump a break, said Vietnam veteran Timothy Kelly. Monday afternoon found the 69-year-old former soldier outside the Hyatt Regency in downtown Atlanta, where the Disabled American Veterans earlier that day had listened to President Barack Obama address the organization during its annual convention.

“I like Mr. Trump,” said Kelly, 69, a resident of Fairfield, Conn. He “The father (Khan) was out of line.”

Trump was the one crossing the wrong line, responded Air Force veteran Anderson Edwards, also attending the DAV convention.

“For someone who has had so much success, not to show some empathy for someone who has had so much loss?” he asked.

“It was ridiculous,” said Edwards, 62, who served nearly 30 years and now lives in Panama City. “It was irresponsible. It was uncaring. It was unpatriotic.”

Trump's response also troubles Doria Alecksen, an Eatonton resident. She is a member of American Gold Star Mothers Inc., an organization with the worst sort of membership requirements. It's open to those who have lost a son or daughter in military service.

Her daughter, Army Spec. Erica Alecksen, died in July 2012 when an IED — an improvised explosive device, a roadside bomb — blew up the truck in which she was riding in Afghanistan. It killed five other soldiers, too.

The AJC profiled the impact of Erica's death, and the demise of her father six weeks later. "A Family Fractured" appeared in October that year.

Alecksen's youngest, Charles, has followed his sister's career choice. A student at the University of North Georgia, he's in the Army Reserve, with plans of going full-time Army when he graduates in 2019.

Alecksen doesn’t understand Trump’s anger at the Khans.

“Their child loved the United States and was fighting for our country,” Alecksen said. “Regardless of what Trump says, this was a Gold Star family, and they always will be — just as I am.

“I thought he (Trump) had something going for him,” Alecksen said. “And now I think, ‘He really did this?’ It’s baffling to me.”

The pending election is just as befuddling to Karmen Callaway. Seven years ago, the Smyrna resident prayed daily as her three sons deployed to Afghanistan. She never wants to make the sacrifice the Khans made.

“My heart breaks for the Khans,” said Callaway. “I have so much gratitude for their son did.”

Yes, it is true that Trump has not made any sacrifice comparable to that which the Khans made, Callaway said. But neither has the Democratic nominee.

“I will vote,” said Callaway, 54. “I will. I just don’t know who for.”