A healthy, vibrant marriage consists to two people who are attuned to one another and who serve one another; two people who are willing to sublimate their almighty and most narcissistic selves to the betterment of the union. This is done by simply asking “What can I do for you?”. It is done through humility, submission and other things that, unfortunately, are no longer part of our national vocabulary.
Paying more attention to and doing more for one’s spouse requires paying less attention to and doing less for the kids. But that will be easy, because when children see a marriage coming back together, they ask for less attention. This happens naturally. They begin to relax. They begin doing their own thing, letting you do yours.
And before you know it, you’re on the same page, but the likelihood is that this same page will be different from either of the separate pages you once occupied. And the kids will approve, believe me.
You can contact family psychologist John Rosemond on his website at www.johnrosemond.com.