There’s something about leading a workshop that makes me say things I ordinarily wouldn’t. I don’t know if it’s the group dynamic, or the power of standing in the front, but put me in a workshop and suddenly my inner snark appears. And boy, does she have things to say.
I’ve been giving a lot of job search workshops lately, so I’ve had the chance to be shocked by Miss Snark on several occasions. Here are just a few of the things that have popped out of my mouth with utter conviction:
- This isn't about you; it's about what you can do for others.
- I don't care if you find the ideal job. Bliss isn't the goal; re-employment is the goal.
- Quit trying to be good at job search and focus on being done with it.
- Coming to this workshop doesn't count as job search. Only direct contact to employers counts as job search.
- Networking isn't about making friends.
- The more time you have, the longer this will take. Quit stretching this out; set a deadline and finish your job search.
And I used to be so nice. I’ll let you draw your own conclusions on what might have made me this way. In the meantime, here’s the explanation for the above statements.
1. “This isn’t about you.” One of the classic mistakes job seekers make is assuming that others care about their career goals. Of course your friends and families care, but in the world of business, that’s more than you can expect.
While this reality can seem harsh, it’s actually very liberating. Once you stop trying to get others to understand your career aspirations, you can focus on discovering ways to contribute to their aspirations instead -- which will lead them to hire you.
2. “Bliss isn’t the goal.” As a career counselor, I am so, so ready to end the era of seeking self-fulfillment through work. My frustration stems from the fact that I seldom meet anyone who is actually blissful about their work. The tighter the market, the less likely I am to support a bliss-centered job search. I’d rather help someone find employment, then work to make the situation satisfying.
3. “Quit trying to be good at job search.” In any class I teach, I’ll have participants whose only aim is to achieve perfection with an online job application. They are focused on all the ways to “win” at a system that is unwinnable, while they completely ignore the messy, error-prone but highly effective process of simply talking to people and asking for work. I get that online apps are “safe,” but I don’t get the overall point -- if the goal is to never be rejected, why job search at all?
4. “Only direct contact with employers counts as job search.” It’s really mean to tell someone who has gotten up early and bused to your class that they aren’t engaging in a job search activity. But if I can’t hire them, and their classmates aren’t in the position to make a hire, I stick with my assessment: This is preparation, but it isn’t actual job search.
Similarly, I don’t count research, resume writing or most networking as job search. Anything other than direct, person-to-person contact with an employer is either preparation or a misuse of time. My simple rule: Before starting an activity, ask yourself if this will prepare you for or lead to direct contact with employers. If the answer is no, use the time to call employers instead.
5. “Networking isn’t about making friends.” I know that most networking sessions teach the value of building relationships. And yet, I have to ask: Do the people on the receiving end of this networking actually want a new relationship?
Even though I think people are pretty overwhelmed with the friends they’re ignoring now, I also believe they still want to be helpful. To make things easier for networking contacts, job seekers should present a specific request (can you help me learn the name of XYZ’s accounting manager?) rather than a vague invitation to meet and chat.
6. “Set a deadline and finish your job search.” Probably the snarkiest thing of all to say, and yet I think the kindest as well. Job search is misery, and most people want it to be over; I want that, too, and I think it’s more possible than one might imagine.
Yes, some people are doing nearly everything right and still hitting a wall. But so, so many people are only half-searching, even while they’re 100 percent hoping. It’s time to reverse that ratio and get this thing done.
Amy Lindgren owns Prototype Career Service, a career consulting firm in St. Paul. She can be reached at alindgren@prototypecareerservice.com or at 626 Armstrong Ave., St. Paul, MN 55102.
