'Real Housewives of Atlanta' episode 13: chain smokin' and singin'

By Rodney Ho/rho@ajc.com, filed January 10, 2011

Kim Zolciak loves to call her incredibly patient (and hopefully well compensated) servant/assistant out by name whenever she needs her for anything short of brushing her teeth. Heck, Sweetie will even give Kim a B-12 shot with a scary looking syringe if need be.

Sweetie must spend plenty of time with Kim's kids, too, because her oldest daughter Brielle gets disturbingly upset when she finds out that Kim and Sweetie are going on a week-long, three-city bus tour to promote both Kandi's upcoming songs and Kim's second single "The Ring Didn't Mean a Thing." Brielle''s 13. You'd think she'd be thrilled, as a teen, to have some time away from the adults.

Anyway, Kim is in perpetual complaint mode. She gets quickly annoyed with Kandi's road tour manager, who is (believe it or not) dubbed Don Juan. She thinks the bus looks like a Motel 6. She can't believe she can't smoke on the bus. She finds the bathroom and the bunk beds too claustrophobic. She doesn't appreciate Don Juan and Kandi questioning her song and Big Poppa. She complains about the  "military"-like time restrictions. She needs rest. She needs liquor. "We're not machines!" she opines. Kandi, who is much more easy going, worries Kim won't do well at Club Tempo in Charlotte.

In the end, Kim pulls it off and the crowd is happy. And she gets flowers from Falcons player and Kim's future sperm donor Kroy Biermann!

All is well, at least this episode.

In other "Housewives" nonsense:

- NeNe Leakes worked on her first celebrity interview for 11 Alive with music producer and former Janet Jackson squeeze Jermaine Dupri. Dupri gave her a hard time at first ("I can't stare at a brick wall and talk to myself!") but once he gave her a tour of his studios and his basketball court, she got enough material for her piece. "This was a whole lot tougher than I thought," she noted afterwards.

- Phaedra Parks and her hubby Apollo hosted what she dubbed as a "sip and see," in which people drink and admire the baby. Dwight Eubanks introduces them as "royalty." "This is a sip and see," Phaedra said. "We won't touch him cos we have germy hands!" The baby, actually, is adorable. Kim and Phaedra hash out their differences from a previous episode. Kim even shows Phaedra her old nursing certificate. Kim, to the camera, said she likes Phaedra but still thinks she's a liar over her due date.

Credit: Rodney Ho

Credit: Rodney Ho

-

Cynthia Bailey

and her husband

Peter Thomas

argue over money and whether Peter should give up and sell his struggling Uptown Restaurant and Lounge in downtown Atlanta. "It's like chipping away at you," Cynthia tells Peter. "You're turning into a bitter man. It's like a prison!" Cynthia wants him to unload it at any price. She already invested a lot of her own cash into the business. They even go to a counselor, actor and relationships expert

Hill Harper

.  Sadly, the arguments only get worse. (In the end, he does because it's now called Harlem Nights.)

- Sheree Whitfield made a few comments at Phaedra's "sip and see" ("I think she's making that up!" she said.) and exercises with Phaedra (who makes absurd comments about her own booty) but  her life was not otherwise addressed.

QUOTABLE QUOTES

"I think people who see me in the courtroom being the little Johnny Cochran will be surprised that I'm Martha Stewart on the inside all day!" - Phaedra, being Phaedra

"We're attractive, we're doing well and unfortunately, people are not happy for other people's success in Atlanta. Haterville!" - Phaedra, being Phaedra.

"She's like Jessica Rabbit gone bad " - Phaedra, on Kim in an over-tight black dress.

"I'm not judgmental like that," - Phaedra, to Kim, about her past. Phaedra judgmental? Naahhhh....

"I'm okay with you drinking if you let me to smoke."  - Kim, telling the bus driver to "drink and drive."

"Just when I thought Phaedra couldn't be more over the top, now she's royalty." - Cynthia, rolling her eyes.

IN PROMOS

Next week, Peter continue to fight with Cynthia and the wedding is in jeopardy. Kandi gets peeved with Kim and Sweetie during the bus tour. And NeNe visits the bus and gets into a nasty argument with Kim.

RATINGS

We got a two-week break from "Real Housewives of Atlanta" over the holidays. I actually took a three-week break because I was on vacation during episode 12, which I watched but did not have to blog about. That 12th episode drew yet another 3.2 million viewers, matching a season high. That's up from 2.6 million for the same episode a year earlier. The show has surpassed its year-ago numbers four of the past five episodes. Tonight's was episode 13. There are two more scheduled episodes followed by the reunion shows.

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By Rodney Ho, rho@ajc.com, AJCRadioTV blog