Q: How do I speed up my computer? It's practically at a standstill now, and it's driving me crazy. I added more memory and have gone online with a so-called "speed up your computer" outfit (silly me), deleted some unwanted programs and have taken some advice from friends who meant well. Any suggestions or advice that can help? — John Scandaglia
A: There are too many possible reasons for a slow computer for me to give you a good answer. I don't know how old your computer is, what operating system it is running, or whether it has problems with viruses or malware. If the computer is relatively recent, one possible cause is malware. These tiny programs – either adware, spyware or viruses – can infest a computer and really slow it down.
One way to start would be to use a good anti-malware program to see what it finds, especially if the problem is a recent one.
Some people have a junk drawer. In my large house, with all the kids gone, I have entire junk rooms.
I would tell you that is a wonderful thing. But that can’t be so. My wife tells me, often in words and phrases only known to the Irish, that my junky habits are an abomination to man and beast.
We’ll let that go. I am beyond help. But I can say with some authority that a junk drawer or two — even a junk closet if you can manage that, will make your computing life much more pleasant and productive. Follow my example and that accumulation of junk will do two wonderful things. It will often let you get a balky computer running again and, as a bonus, it also provides a way to diagnose and fix computer problems — even if you don’t know beans about how a computer works.
Let’s take a look at those two points and start with how your collection of junk can bring life to a dead computer. I stash away old monitors, video cards, hard disks that I’ve replaced with newer ones, printers and assorted other junk.
Often that lets me — when a computer stops working, even after the stores have closed — dig around in my junk pile and find a substitute for a mouse that died an ugly death, a monitor that no longer monitors, or a printer that has gone insane.
Not only is it economical, it avoids a way around one of the mysteries of computing. The mystery is this. The very worst computer disasters happen when some project for work or home requires a computer. It’s almost as if your computer knows it is needed and that critical need flips some mystical off switch that turns the machine into an overpriced doorstop. And the second part of this mystery is this — that computer disaster often happens early in the morning or late at night when there’s no hope to get help from a computer technician.
And that’s not all folks. You can also use your junk collection to diagnose problems with a computer. Let me offer a “for instance.” Your computer monitor begins to blink, flash and generally misbehave. That problem could be caused by a bad video card, or a bad cable that connects the monitor, or it could be that the monitor itself is dying.
If your junk pile contains an old monitor, or an old but working cable, or a working video adapter, you can substitute parts that you know work to find out the true culprit. And, like I said, you don’t need to understand the why of things. If you plug in the junk monitor and everything works, well you know the problem was the monitor. However, if you plug it in and things are still bad, you know that it is either the video adapter or the cable. So you can use more substitutes from your collection of junk to narrow things down.
Here’s the beauty of all that. Not only can you identify the problem, but you’ll get the computing working again so that you can — at your leisure — buy and replace the bad part.
I’m not done with my praise for junk.
Let’s start with something you already know. Used computers have the same monetary value as a loaf of week-old bread. To me that offers an opportunity, not a problem. Old computers — stored away in your junk collection — can wait in reserve for times that you have both a problem and a desperate need to use a computer.
After all, if the machine was working when you stored it away, then it will work when you plug it in again.
I realize that you may not be able to — for reasons of space or marital harmony — be able to match my junk collection in size. But even if you just tuck away a mouse or an old but working keyboard, you are on your way to a happier computing life.
