Recently, I heard yet another story of a woman connecting with a scammer on a legitimate dating site. These men are con artists who will find a way to touch your heart and your pocketbook without a second thought. I don’t want to scare you and cause you to stop going online because there are good men on dating sites for you to date. But, there are certain clues you need to be aware of that will tip you off to potential scammers.
Read through these nine tips about what scammers tell you, so you’ll know how to protect yourself from their lies and schemes.
1. Scammers feed off specific clues you put in your profile
Don’t mention your income or where you work. You can say you’re a nurse or an executive but don’t mention where or how much you make. Be aware of sounding needy and lonely in your profile. It makes you perfect prey for scammers looking to hook you into their scams.
2. He usually lives outside the U.S.
He might tell you that he lives in a metropolitan city in the U.S. but his work takes him elsewhere in the world. He says he’ll be coming back soon, and, of course, to wait for him because he can’t wait to meet you.
3. Scamming women is his job
Most of these men live in poorer countries around the world where jobs that pay well are scarce. He’s learned that by working a couple of hours each day, he can easily communicate with women in the U.S., find their weak spots and make a fortune.
He’ll probably speak with a British accent that sounds so romantic especially to American women. He knows this and uses it to his advantage to hook you.
4. What he’ll tell you about himself
He’ll have a romantic name like Valentino or Antonio. His picture online is usually drop dead gorgeous in a romantic sort of way. And he uses this knowing you’ll feel special being contacted by someone this handsome.
Look closely at those pictures. They are often shots found on the internet of handsome models in ads selling items like hats or sunglasses. Or he’s holding a product in his hand like beer or wine. Or he might be standing in front of an unusual looking building or an expensive car. When you ask for more pictures, he’ll send family pictures of children or grandchildren.
The big tip-off: he’s not in these family pictures because he can’t find any more pics of the model’s image he’s used.
5. He uses romance to lure you in
Women love romance and these men know this has been missing in your life for a long time. So he steals poems off the internet and sends them to you as if they were his own. Your heart just melts and you bond with him which makes you even more vulnerable to his scheme.
6. He’ll always have an excuse for why he can’t see you
He’ll tell you that he can’t wait to see you and that he’s making arrangements to travel in a month or two when he can get away from his business. Right before you’re supposed to meet, he has to cancel the trip for some reason. This happens over and over again and is another huge tip off you’re dealing with a scammer.
7. You can’t find anything concrete about who this man is
Try searching on Google for your Valentino or Antonio. More than likely nothing will show up.
8. How the scam works
He’ll take the time to chat with you every day for hours.
His male attentiveness feels amazing because he knows it’s probably been a while since a man has been this devoted to you. But beware; what he’s really doing is he is looking for your weak spots. If you’ve lost a close member of your family, don’t be surprised if he tells you he has too. He uses these holes in your heart to get you to trust him knowing it will be easy for you to bond with someone who has experienced the same loss as you.
As you’re bonding, he’s telling you things like I love you baby, I can’t wait to see you, baby. Now he’s ready to rein you in for the scam. He shares news with you about a HUGE business deal he’s about to close and once it’s done, he’ll come see you. He just needs a little more money to finish it or he’ll lose everything. He might tell you that family members have invested as well but the bank won’t be able to give him the last bit he needs so he’s going to lose the deal and all the money he and his family have invested.
This is when he asks you for your help.
He’s done the work needed to capture your heart. You’re in love with him and you don’t want to see him suffer. You want to help him so you wire the money he needs to his bank account. And you never hear from him again.
9. Action plan for protecting yourself from a scammer
Thousands of intelligent women get caught up in these scams every year. To keep your journey of dating safe, here’s what you can do….
_ Date men closer to home.
_ Keep emails short and sweet. Maximum of five to 10 at the most.
_ Spend no more than a couple of hours on one or two phone calls max. Meet a man within two to three weeks.
If a man tells you he’ll be out of the country for a month or two, tell him to give you a call when he gets back.
Upload his profile picture to Google Images. You’ll be able to see if the image matches who he says he is or if he’s stolen it from someone else.
It’s hard enough to attract a quality man without having to worry about scammers online.
Today more than ever, you want to post the type of profile at an online dating site that gets you the right attention online from the right men.
Lisa Copeland, “The Dating Coach Who Makes Dating Fun and Easier after 50!” Find out more at Findaqualityman.com
Support real journalism. Support local journalism. Subscribe to The Atlanta Journal-Constitution today. See offers.
Your subscription to the Atlanta Journal-Constitution funds in-depth reporting and investigations that keep you informed. Thank you for supporting real journalism.