Didn’t someone once say, “It’s not paranoia if someone’s really chasing you”? Well, that makes sense. Unfortunately, when it comes to work situations, some dire circumstance may indeed be chasing you, but not in a way that you can easily see or measure.
When it comes to careers, all kinds of situations can raise the hair on one’s neck. It could be closed-door meetings, conversations that stop when you walk in, a slowdown in assignments, or the cancellation of the staff picnic.
Whether the situation is personal, departmental or companywide, you can’t help but feel vulnerable. When the feeling escalates to anxiety, or when it impacts your work, it’s time to take action.
That said, it can be difficult to problem-solve when you’re not certain there actually is a problem.
When I talk with clients who are mired in such confusing work scenarios, I’m guided by these questions as I listen to their stories:
First, “What’s real here, and what’s not real?” I look for a sense of perspective by asking if others have expressed the same concerns, if there are other interpretations possible, and if they have anything more than intuition to verify what’s happening.
At the same time, I’m listening for clues to this question: “What needs attention here, and what might suffer from getting too much attention?” In other words, could the worker either be ignoring a signal that needs heeding, or over-responding to something that would best be left to die down?
And finally, I’m hoping we can answer this question: “Is this person’s fear protective or is it holding him/her back?”
Assuming one can identify an issue to resolve, the problem-solving question becomes: “What can I do about this?”
One option is to take the direct approach. If you really thought you were being watched from behind a tree, you might holler “Who’s there?” and rush to look. Thriller movies are based on this premise, with the audiences screaming out, “Stay away from the tree!” We know how that turns out in the movies.
In real life, a direct conversation can sometimes resolve the issue in moments. This might work when you feel a boss or colleague has been cool to you, holding back on assignments or praise they would normally give. You might simply ask, “Has anything changed in your confidence in my work? I feel as if you’ve been holding back lately. I want to know, so that I can work on whatever it is that might be bothering you.”
This approach can be effective for anything from a perceived cold shoulder to a likely layoff scenario — in which case, you might say, “I know the department is looking at possible layoffs, and I wanted to know if there’s anything we should be discussing at this point. I don’t want to be laid off, but I don’t want to be caught by surprise either.”
If you initiate the conversation, remember that the problem might be something you can fix, or it might not be about you at all. Maybe the manager is having personal problems, for example, or perhaps the company is on the block for acquisition. Of course, just because you’re not responsible for the situation doesn’t mean you shouldn’t watch out.
To ease your fears, but also to prepare yourself for the worst, you may need to take some steps.
1. Seek an outside perspective.
2. Evaluate the worst-case scenario and decide what you can do to prevent it. If there’s nothing you can do, then determine how you can prepare yourself to survive it. Answers might include building a financial reserve, taking a part-time job to cushion a possible layoff, networking to improve your chances of switching jobs on short notice, etc.
3. Get your house in order by updating your resume and copying your contact list from your company cellphone or computer (in case you’re locked out on short notice).
4. Once these steps are finished, stop dwelling on the situation. Additional ruminating will only imperil your peace of mind. And consider this possibility: If no one’s chasing you, but you keep acting as if someone were, someone probably will.
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