Capt. Chris Esquivel served two tours of duty in Iraq. First as a platoon leader in search of the enemy. Next as senior officer on the ground to advise and assist the nationals in the Middle East.
“My first time there was offensive, find the enemy,” he told me. “It was different the second tour because we were closing down shop in Iraq. It was still difficult, though. Deployments don’t get easier.”
He and his wife, Jessica, married nearly two years ago. They met at the University of Dayton, where he majored in political science and joined the ROTC.
Combat soldiers are accustomed to being on the go. They stand ready to tackle the next priority, that next military assignment. The transition from soldier to civilian, from combat zone to home, job, career and family can prove difficult.
Recently, the Esquivels and 12 other couples took part in the Callaway Homecoming Initiative, a program that helps military families with combat-to-peacetime transitions. It’s all free, including accommodations in Callaway’s southern pine cottages.
Esquivel had a clear sense of what he had endured and experienced as a soldier. After all, he lived it and had heard stories of veterans who’d returned from war zones.
What he didn’t fully grasp was the pain of an Army wife. Left behind, they, too, can be combat-weary.
For example, during a group session Esquivel heard what it was like for spouses to receive a telephone call from their husbands only to have the line go dead.
So the Callaway initiative proved an eye-opener for Esquivel. He learned what his wife went through during his deployment and gleaned insight from experiences of other couples.
“You usually don’t get the spousal aspects of it, especially with multiple families involved,” he said. “It was a great chance to take a step back, to re-evaluate myself and to adjust priorities.
“We were able to discuss the tough issues, but the unique part was to have soldiers and their families hear information regarding physical and mental health. Callaway Gardens is a place where my wife and I felt like we were falling in love all over again.”
Fort Benning’s Samuel Rhodes says the program provides a “real picture” of concrete issues.
“We don’t understand some things spouses and children go through,” he said. “One thing I noticed was the increased cohesion of the families. It takes a while to get everything back in a groove.”
For Esquivel, the military runs deep. His relatives served in Vietnam and World War II. He has four more years of an eight-year commitment. He’s currently a civil affairs officer.
“My wife and I personally believe people should serve,” he said. “It’s a sense of pride, and I would have served regardless of 9 /11. We love serving our country. The Army has wonderful opportunities.”
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