Race and coffee talk

I feel conflicted by the exciting work of this new opportunity, eager to engage and, based on your response to me, get to know you a little better.

But mostly I feel weary from all the talk about coffee and race, about the acrid reaction to Starbucks' new "Race Together" initiative.

Starbucks CEO Howard Schultz has urged employees to write “Race Together” on their paper cups “to facilitate a conversation between you and our customers.” Conversation starters include the fill-in-the-blank question: “In the past year, I have been to the home of someone of a different race ___ times.”

I've looked into the abyss of Twittersphere and have seen the future of race relations in America and it worries me.

The backlash to the Starbucks effort has been fast and furious and in the worst kind of way.

“Sorry, not interested in the opinions of a minimum wage hipster,” one person tweeted.

“And everyone knows how great white people are at talking about race,” said another.

And this one: “I’ll throw a skinny latte in the face of any associate that brings up O.J. Simpson.”

Starbucks posted a reply to the negative responses on its corporate twitter account Tuesday morning, saying "It's worth a little discomfort."

They're right, you know, but I'm tired of talking about race. Tired of the surveys telling us how bad race relations are. Tired of hearing and reading what I already know. Tired of hoping we can be grown-ups and just treat each other the way we want to be treated.

Starbucks, whether you agree or disagree, is as good a place as any to start.

I’m not a regular there. I prefer to drink my coffee at home but knowing I had about $11 left on a $25 Christmas gift card, I headed to a location near my home in Johns Creek, curious about how the campaign might be playing out. Were the baristas engaged? What did that look like?

I order a $1.98 cup of medium house brew and take a seat facing the action. I watch three baristas, two white, one black and all male, take orders from a steady stream of men and women of all ages, colors and nationalities. I marvel at the melting pot and figure Ms. Judy, who is white, is a regular because the African-American barista almost does the happy dance when he greets her. Ms. Judy soon picks up her order at the end of the counter and heads to the exit, smiling. Bye Brandon, she says, waving with her free hand.

Brandon doesn’t mention race. He doesn’t scribble “Race Together” on her coffee cup. But in their very short interaction, I saw what could be if we’d just abide by the golden rule and I felt good for the first time since I kissed my husband and bid him good day just five hours earlier.

I feel this way every time I come here because as customer service goes, it doesn’t get any better than this. The baristas look you in the eye when they talk to you. They smile like they’re happy to see you. Most of the time they leave enough room in my cup to add a little half and half, raw sugar, nutmeg and cinnamon like I ask. I’ve never once felt slighted because I was asked to show my ID while the white person ahead of me was given a pass like I have in other establishments. I’m not followed around because someone thinks I’m stealing. The servers smile at me, too.

Honestly, most days that’s all I hope for – not some conversation about race.

Having said that, I can appreciate Schultz's gesture. The constant news stories of white police officers shooting black men, beating black women on the side of freeways, the retaliation by blacks and the constant protests have left me weary, too.

But I just don’t want to talk about race anymore. I’ve talked until I’m blue in the face. There is nothing worse than telling someone you feel discriminated against and having them dismiss you out of hand or become indignant.

Rodney King asked if we could all just get along. I’ve got a better question. Can we all just take a time-out and do some introspection?

I get that it’s tough being honest with each other about race matters. Too often that brings on an attack. But how about we try taking a moment to be honest with ourselves? You should hear some of the conversations I have with myself while riding alone in my car to work. It’s the one time I can be brutally honest about who I am but it’s also when I resolve to be better, to work on changing how I treat myself and more importantly, how I treat others.

We’re all so flawed. So flawed. Come to think of it, God declares in Isaiah 64:6 that even “our righteousnesses are as filthy rags.” The Apostle Paul put it this way: even when I try to do right, I find myself doing wrong. That’s certainly been true in my life but none of us should give up trying. Maybe that means talking. But maybe it’s as simple as abiding by the golden rule.

I’ve watched the unrest in the streets. I sense a gloom I’ve never seen before. And I feel the despair.

But we can make this right. We can treat our neighbors as we’d like to be treated. We can be the difference our community and nation so desperately needs.