The economy added 288,00 new jobs in June. But how is that good news when we had 1,274,000 layoffs in June? That's a net loss of almost a million jobs in one month and we're calling it a victory? This must be the new common core math I'm hearing about if that's considered good economic news.

Just so the politicians clearly understand: If I don't recognize the phone number, I don't answer.

Single men, one episode of the "Housewives of Anything" and you"ll be content with being single for a long time.

Please consider others when you start your car or motorcycle in the morning. It is not necessary to spend 15 minutes revving up the motor. Everybody is not enjoying it.

Are you suggesting that "Atlanta" drivers are worse than up North where you're from? You haven't been home lately, have you?

I used the Pythagorean theorem at work today.

I'm a retired aviator, flown off of carriers, landed on dirt roads and have flown to many foreign countries. I haven't had to find X even one time.

How did dogs ever survive before they had owners?

Pi r not squared. cornbread r squared, pi r round.

Attention TV stations: When Flo comes on your station, the light goes off on my TV. It's just so simple for me to go to another station or turn the box off, but Flo won't be visiting my living room.

After all these years, I can still remember hearing MLK's I Have A Dream speech for the first time. It still gives me chill bumps when I hear it!

My dash cam and my sleazy lawyer have been very profitable this year. Please keep on hitting me when I drive slow in the fast lane.