Norma Jay Barnes, CEO and president of the Community Council of Metropolitan Atlanta Inc., set the stage for the event:
“The voice of our country has spoken loudly and passionately about the plight of young black men,” she said. “The national conversation has included town hall meetings, legal debates, political arguments, academic assessments, petitions, marches, calls for boycotts and more. Young black men aged 18 to 28 find themselves in the center of this controversy, but your voices are not being heard. We want you to tell us how you feel and what you need to overcome the odds you face in society.”
And tell us they did.
They told stories about smoking weed daily; wrestling with being young fathers; having trouble finding jobs; readjusting to society after incarceration; growing up fatherless and in some cases without a full-time mother; alienation as a minority on a college campus and in corporate America; and wanting to be business owners. Many stories were heart-wrenching, full of despair and due to poor choices.
It was obvious that the younger black men were open to feedback and input from the older men. The older men relished the opportunity to hear what was on the young brothers’ minds. In one discussion, we talked about developing the ability to cooperate with people and take responsibility for one’s actions.
At one point, one young man asked: “So what questions do you what to ask us?” My response was: “What’s up with all of the violence? What has happened in your life that makes you so angry and cold that you could shoot another person or a mother and her baby in a stroller?”
The response: Some young blacks have been so marginalized and alienated that they feel nobody cares about them. I told them many of us are afraid to say anything to them, like “Pull your pants up,” because they look so angry and menacing.
This is exactly what’s missing – open dialogue - the opportunity for older men to talk to our young men. It was evident many of the young men had grown up in single-parent households without male role models. Many of the male role models they did have were negative influences.
Our young black men are in pain. They hurt and have nobody to talk to. They have something to say andstories to tell. As older brothers, fathers and leaders in the community, we have to come to the table and listen.
Barnes’ program has the potential to become a national model for a dialogue between old and young black men. Let’s keep this going. Let’s talk, and hear what’s on their minds. Let’s be there to share skills and strategies to survive as black men in America.
If we can’t be there for them, who will?
