Before releasing his new economics tome, Thomas Piketty may (or may not) have sought funding to publish the book on ABC’s “Shark Tank.” If he did, here’s what was said.
PIKETTY: Bonsoir. I am Thomas Piketty, professor at the Paris School of Economics and author of a new book about wealth and inequality. I ask you for $200,000, in exchange for 10 percent of my book's proceeds.
(Sharks exchange looks of sticker shock.)
PIKETTY: In “Capital in the 21st Century,” I explain why the natural tendency of capitalist systems is the concentration of wealth among few people.
KEVIN O’LEARY: People like us.
PIKETTY (chuckling): Yes, Monsieur Wonderful. And I explain why this is bad, and what to do about it.
DAYMOND JOHN: You’re putting a valuation of $2 million on your book, which is a — how many pages is it?
PIKETTY: Almost 700.
JOHN: Whoa! So, you wrote a 700-page book about economics, and you think it’s going to sell well in America?
PIKETTY: (Shrugs) That is only 80,000 copies at $25 apiece.
O’LEARY: Eighty-thousand people is a lot of people to read a book about economics …
MARK CUBAN: They don’t all have to read it. They just have to buy it and put it on their bookshelves to make themselves look smart.
PIKETTY: (Smiles)
CUBAN: But why would I want to invest in a book that demonizes people like me?
PIKETTY: As the book explains, you will do nothing else worthwhile with your money!
(Sideways frowns from the sharks.)
PIKETTY: I am joking! (Softly: Sort of.) Really, it is in your interest to promote my message. Inequality is dangerous. In the last century, it took two world wars to redistribute the great wealth that had accumulated in Europe. My recommendations are much less gruesome.
LORI GREINER: We don’t sell a lot of economics books on QVC, so I’m out.
PIKETTY: Merci, madame.
ROBERT HERJAVEC: I’m not sure I agree capital grows so easily. A lot of investments lose money, too. We take a risk when we invest in entrepreneurs. If our return on investment from the successes is high, that’s why.
PIKETTY: I prefer not to dwell on the risks. I focus on the returns, which make it harder for most people to live well.
HERJAVEC: My parents fled a communist regime with just one suitcase. Now look where I am. I don’t buy the concept. I’m out.
PIKETTY: Thank you. Monsieur Cuban?
CUBAN: I’m a pretty free-market guy, so you’re wasting your time with me. I’m out.
PIKETTY: Monsieur John?
JOHN: I grew up with a single mother in Queens. I started out sewing hats and grew that into a global brand. Your theories don’t fit with my experience. I’m out.
PIKETTY: Monsieur Wonderful. I know you care only about money …
O’LEARY: You’re right, but that means I don’t like to lose money. Here’s what I’ll do. I’ll give you the $200,000, but I don’t want any equity. I want $15 for each book sold until you pay me back, and $10 a book after that.
PIKETTY: Monsieur! That is robbery! You will make more money than I do … just like in my book!
O’LEARY: Even so, you’ll make more than if I don’t give you the money, as your book apparently ignores.
PIKETTY: (Frowns) I cannot accept your offer. I will find someone who doesn't mind taking capitalists' money and using it to argue against capitalism — someone like an Ivy League book publisher. Au revoir.
