The media frenzy surrounding suspended NFL player Ray Rice highlights the need to engage men and male-dominated institutions like the NFL in ending violence against women. While most media coverage has concentrated on the NFL’s punishment of Rice, we as a nation need to focus on changing a culture that supports men who batter women.
As Men Stopping Violence (MSV) co-founder Dick Bathrick has asked, “Should we be focusing on the few men who got caught, or on the men who could stop them?”
For 33 years, Men Stopping Violence has led efforts to end violence against women through institutional and cultural change, working with more than 2,500 organizations including the U.S. military, businesses, institutions of higher education and governments across the world. The Decatur-based nonprofit was one of the organizations recently invited by the NFL to provide insights “from the field.” Its community-accountability model provides a blueprint for how we can approach the daunting task of shifting a culture.
The organization maintains that, while individual batterers are accountable for their own behavior, the entire community is responsible for ending violence against women. MSV Executive Director Ulester Douglas has argued, for example, that NFL fans bear responsibility for holding the league accountable for its failure to address violence against women.
Men Stopping Violence recognizes the particular role men play in community accountability because it knows men hear other men in ways they often don’t hear women. Thus, men are well positioned to challenge the destructive masculinity that pervades our culture and institutions and replace it with new ways of thinking about “being a man.”
As former football player James Brown puts it, “When a guy says you throw a ball like a girl or you’re a sissy, it reflects an attitude that devalues women and attitudes that will eventually manifest in some fashion. So this is yet another call to men to stand up and take responsibility for their thoughts, their words, their deeds, and to get help.”
Through courses and trainings, Men Stopping Violence teaches men to “get help and give help” by making the connection between violence against women and sexism — in the media, workplace or ways men talk about women when women aren’t present. When women aren’t valued as fully equal and autonomous human beings, violence spreads. MSV challenges men to involve other men in the movement and take an active role in changing a culture that supports violence, consciously or unconsciously.
Similarly, when working with organizations and institutions such as the military or higher education, Men Stopping Violence challenges men to recognize and combat sexism by considering whether and to what extent their institutional structures, policies and cultures contribute to the devaluation of women. Does the institutional culture exclude women from leadership positions and important conversations? Do women trust the institution to believe victims and respond to incidents of violence? Is it an “old boys’ club” or a truly inclusive environment for women? Institutions and individuals within them must be challenged to examine these issues and take action.
Recognizing that the media is another powerful tool, Men Stopping Violence has long provided expert analysis on violence against women for The Atlanta Journal-Constitution, CNN, The New York Times, Al-Jazeera America and other outlets. Such analyses strengthen the public’s understanding and directs attention toward long-term solutions. MSV has also critiqued mainstream and social media. It recently noted endless repetition of the Ray Rice video which, shown without proper context, sensationalizes violence while desensitizing people to the impact such violence has on the lives of millions of women.
To be sure, accountability for perpetrators and resources for survivors are critical. But we must also focus on the long game of cultural transformation, which cannot be accomplished without a true partnership between men and women to end the violence that affects us all.
Dona Yarbrough, a board member for Men Stopping Violence, is special assistant to the provost and director of the Center for Women at Emory University.
