The worst thing that ever happened to me as I walked home from a bar in Atlanta was finding a couple actively engaged in romance on my front lawn.
I ignored them and went inside.
No one died.
India is nothing like Los Angeles Avenue.
There, it is reported at least 13 have been killed by a man-eating leopard who has developed a taste for besotted human flesh.
An International Business News reporter says the big cat has "targeted drinkers" and preyed upon 13 "sozzled victims" in a rural area in the foothills of the Himalayas.
Villagers are now carrying sticks with them when they go walking, which makes me think they must not have access to shotguns or flame throwers.
Three attempts to hunt down the leopard, which is believed to hunt humans because it has run out of dogs to eat, have failed.
The Telegraph has an earlier story quoting a conservationist that seems to blame humans for the leopard attacks.
"Quite frankly when people are drunk and weave their way back home to the village they are easy prey. I don't think the leopard is targeting drunk people, just people stumbling along the path at night.
"I'm sure you won't taste any better because you've consumed liquor," said the conservationist.
You heard it here first: If you drink solely to make your flesh more tasty to large carnivores you can stop now.
More news I ran across Monday:
- Half of all U.S. adults have some form of diabetes
- Female cycling team appears nude in new uniforms
- Pizza Hut apologizes for "free small pet with large pizza" offer
- Warner Bros. sues small bar for playing 80-year-old song
- Electrical grid in Vermont's biggest city uses no fossil fuels
- Goldfish owners pay hundreds to remove brain tumor
- Bill Murray show up at party in S.C.
- Seattle man awakes to find woman raping him
- Pope marries cohabiting couples in mass ceremony
- Maid impregnated by 13-year-old
- Smell of marijuana on kindergartener leads cops to father
- Korean robot can shoot anyone in demilitarized zone from two miles away
- British retailer bans Jewish children from store