If I had a dollar for every time I saw a young man stumbling while trying to run across the street while holding his britches up by clutching fabric near his groin I'd have enough for part of a Happy Meal.
Increased pedestrian safety probably isn't what inspired discussion of a law banning baggy pants in Dadeville, Ala., which I stopped in once when the car I was driving had a flat tire.
I walked into town wearing Levis held up by a properly functioning belt and the fellow running a busy AMC Gremlin repair business kindly helped me get back on the road to Birmingham.
If I had shown up showing him my underwear he might have swung a tire iron at my head instead of letting me borrow it.
Thirty years after that non-historic day, Dadeville is discussing a baggy pants ban .
City Council member Frank Goodman said he has prayed about what to do about young people's fashion choices and thinks a ban might help redefine what is considered "cool."
One city council member is taking the fashion police plan nuclear by suggesting miniskirts and short shorts fall under the new law.
Councilwoman Stephanie Kelley says not doing so is unfair to men.
But there's a difference: Short skirts and shorts aren't worn to prominently display underwear. And, I've never seen anyone tripped up by their Daisy Dukes.
Town attorney Robin Reynolds said he will have the revised ordinance ready for the next council meeting but admits adding "something for the females ... will take a little more creativity."
For fashion choices to get so much attention, one must assume all forms on injustice have been eradicated in Dadeville.