The child was new to a Georgia elementary school this year, and it didn’t go well. She never found a friend group in the tightly knit class, something that can happen when your parents are in the military and you move a lot. Still, she maintained good grades.
Yet, at the end-of-the-year awards ceremony, she was one of two students in the class overlooked. The other child was also new. The girl’s upset mother reached out to me to talk about how schools design honors programs, saying, “I don’t think there’s a good explanation for 97 percent of a class receiving awards and isolating two students.”
I don’t, either. I also don’t think awards enhance students or schools.
While we bemoan every child receiving a trophy, it’s often the same children receiving multiple trophies at school assemblies each year. Factors beyond merit can affect which students get recognized, including how likable the kids are, how involved the parents tend to be and how the selection process works. I’ve had teachers complain their recommendations are bypassed for a more “politically safe” choice.
A longtime critic of school awards is education iconoclast Alfie Kohn, who defines awards assemblies as events that instantly turn most children in the auditorium into losers. A writer and lecturer on parenting and education, Kohn has written 14 books, including "The Myth of the Spoiled Child," "Unconditional Parenting," and "Punished by Rewards."
“Either an awards ceremony is a joke to kids — in which case, why do it? — or it’s taken seriously, in which case it can do real harm. And no one escapes that harm,” he told me in an email. “It’s not hard to see how resentful and demoralized the losers often become. But perceptive people can see that the winners, too, ultimately lose from competition. They, too, come to see themselves as worthy only to the extent they’ve defeated others — a recipe for neurosis. They, too, come to see everyone else as obstacles to their own success, which destroys any possibility of creating a sense of community and caring in the school; and they, too, come to see the learning as just a prerequisite for getting that public pat on the head.”
When I put the question to teachers and parents on social media, more than 120 people responded. Among the comments:
— As an elementary principal, I did away with the honors program replacing it with a portfolio night in each classroom. Students kept examples of their work throughout the year. On portfolio night, they presented their portfolios to their parent showing their growth during the year. A true celebration.
— Where I taught, we are highly encouraged to give every child an award. If we can’t come up with anything, we have to call the parent and tell them that their child is not getting an award … is that really how life works? Because that’s not been my experience with real life.
— I disliked the ceremonies when my sons were in school. A few kids get numerous awards, others one or none, and it’s all dull as can be. It would be great if the teachers invited the parents in and highlighted a positive characteristic of each student — they all have one — then eat a cookie and go home.
— I was a grade-grubbing multiple-award winner in academics and extracurriculars, and I can safely say to the majority of kids the awards mean nothing past the moment they’re given out. I believe they should be abolished altogether. Celebrate the class as a whole for finishing the school year and leave it at that.
— I did not receive an email from my girls’ middle school about the awards ceremony and therefore knew they would not be receiving any awards. The morning of the ceremony I took them to breakfast before school and presented my own awards to them. My eighth-grader received the “Resilience” award for buckling down and asking for extra help and doing hard work when her math grade was quite low. My sixth-grader received the “Tenacity” award for thriving at a brand new school. Both girls loved it, said my effort made it easier to sit through the hour-and-a-half awards ceremony where they got no awards, and they asked if we can do it again next year.
Many parents and teachers endorsed making awards less subjective and more selective, but Kohn argues fewer awards still undermine the sense of community in a school and the desire to learn for its own sake.
“Research has found kids who are rewarded for being generous or caring actually become less generous as a result. Those who are rewarded for reading books are likely to lose interest in reading. Rewards tend to undermine the very thing they’re intended to promote,” he said. “That’s true of grades, stickers, and other doggie biscuits.”
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