Here’s why family dinner is your back-to-school secret weapon

Credit: Courtesy of Susana Solomon

Credit: Courtesy of Susana Solomon

Between nurturing kids’ mental health and strengthening bonds in the process, enjoying a shared meal a few times a week can become one of the most meaningful parts of your family’s routine.

Here are a few tips Solomon recommends for making family dinners work — no matter what your evenings look like.

Why dinner time matters

With years of experience counseling families in schools, youth detention centers and private practice, Solomon has seen just how transformative dinner time can be.

“I always ask families, ‘If I were a fly on the wall during your last family meal, what would I see?’” she said. “Sometimes the answer is that they haven’t eaten together in weeks — and that’s not about shame. It’s about starting where you are.”

Studies show consistency with shared meals, even just two or three times a week, builds emotional safety and self-esteem in kids. Solomon said the impact is even greater when paired with simple rituals like “rose, thorn and bud,” where each person shares something good from their day, a challenge they faced and something they’re looking forward to or want to improve.

“Children thrive when there’s predictability,” Solomon explained. “And a regular shared meal offers that.”

Redefining the table

The modern version of dinner might happen at 9 p.m. after a late shift, or with granola bars in the car between gymnastics and tutoring. That’s OK.

What matters, according to Solomon, is intention.

“To schedule with intention is important,” she said. “The fact of the matter is if you don’t carve out time for your schedule like you would for a doctor’s appointment or a business meeting … we’re (going to) continue to miss (opportunities).”

For families who feel unsure how to spark connection, Solomon says it starts with parents modeling openness.

“Kids don’t want to feel interrogated,” she said. “Lead with vulnerability. Share something that happened in your day, then invite them in.”

Technology at the table (yes, it’s possible)

Ditching screens entirely may not feel realistic, but Solomon recommends setting a 20-minute tech-free window during mealtimes and sticking to it.

“Turn off the sound to the world and turn the volume up to us connecting,” she said.

Eventually, she says, the dinner table can feel like a sanctuary — where kids know they’re safe to vent, laugh or just be quiet.

“(It becomes) a place where I’ve got your back and I want to know what’s been happening with you.”

Connection doesn’t have to be complicated. It just has to be intentional.

“Make time today. If we don’t make time, we’ll never have the time,” she added. “These moments, no matter how brief, are the building blocks of connection.”