For more information on Big Brothers Big Sisters of Metro Atlanta: www.bbbsatl.org.
“I am 38 years old and my best friend is a 17-year-old,” says Kamal Shakir, division manager of business development for a financial recruiting firm. That’s not exactly what Shakir thought would happen when he signed on to mentor Stephon Avery through Big Brothers Big Sisters of Metro Atlanta. Over the past six years, Shakir and Stephon have weathered life’s good, and disappointing moments, and have evolved from mentor/mentee to friends and confidantes. As a testament to their relationship, Stephon, now a senior at North Springs Charter High School, nominated Shakir for the Big Brother of the Year award, which he won. “While going through high school, I was given a glimpse of what I wanted my life to be like by observing Kamal’s life,” Stephon wrote in his nomination letter. “The constant support he has given me — by coming to all of my home games in both football and lacrosse, attending honor events, and showing up to events that my mother couldn’t attend — has really impacted my life in the best way.”
Q: Why did you get involved with Big Brothers Big Sisters?
A: Honestly, that is hard for me to answer. It happened to be a time in my life when I needed more although I didn't know how to define what that more was or what it looked like. I have a nephew and I had played a huge part in raising him while his father was overseas. When he was getting ready to go off to college, I think I was looking for something to fill that void. I don't know if I saw an ad or a billboard for Big Brothers Big Sisters but being a mentor was something that made sense to me.
Q: What do you like about the organization?
A: They do a great job asking the right questions to match young people with the right mentors. I love the fact that there is an accountability piece — they do follow up. They provide not only events but different resources. Along with the fun events, we have attended courses, including one on financial management and pursuing a degree.
Q: Was Stephon who you expected?
A: Truthfully, when I got into the program. I really thought I was going to inherit a child with behavioral problems, a tough kid I needed to mold. I got the complete 180 with Stephon. He is the sweetest kid ever. He has always been, "Yes, sir" and "No, ma'am." His grades were fine. We couldn't be a better match. People will come up and address me as his dad or his big brother. I don't think we have ever corrected them. I have three daughters and he is part of our family.
Q: Given that Stephon was on the right track, what do you think you have given him?
A: He was really shy and reserved and doing things without questioning them. As a kid nowadays, you need to ask questions so you don't end up doing things you shouldn't. I think I have helped give him more self-confidence. He went from being a shy, reserved kid to being named homecoming king and to the honor roll. He is also competitive. That is the one adjective people use to describe me. I think I have helped him believe in himself.
Q: What has he brought you?
A: Oh my goodness. He has helped me become a lot more humble. Being able to be honest. The fact that he trusts me enough to tell me things just shows how good our relationship is. And we have had some talks where I have to remind myself that I am the adult and he is the kid.
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