Author Tayari Jones reveals why Christmas at full tilt affirms a life in bloom
For many years, the only Christmas decoration that author Tayari Jones would allow herself to have was a fancy wreath with tiny glittering lights that steered her to the door of her smallish New York dwelling.
The wreath, a gift from her former Spelman College professor, June McDonald Aldridge, planted a seed of longing, but Jones was single, she did not have children and she did not own a home. She felt she had not yet earned the right to go all out for Christmas.
Her mindset changed when Jones returned to her native city for good in 2018 and decided that Christmas was a language she could, and should, speak for herself and anyone else who has ever felt sidelined by the holiday season.
This is the story that brought me to Jones’ Atlanta home, where a smartly dressed reindeer, with a martini in his raised hoof, greets me at the front door.
At the center of the door is the same (but slightly embellished) wreath that first set Jones on her journey to Christmas joy. Mini Christmas trees filled with brilliant red cardinals and red and gold hand-tied bows flank the whimsical welcome mat.
Jones opened the door wearing a jewel-toned sweater dress and gestured for me to enter the foyer where even on a midday afternoon, the red, green, and white ornaments on a tree with a “Christmas cheer” theme, cast a soft glow throughout the entrance.
“Who has ever been harmed by the addition of beauty in your space?” Jones said as we walk up the staircase with rails dressed in glittering garland to the main level, where two large trees bursting with ornaments are on display in front of picture windows.
Jones has been busy preparing for the February release of her latest novel, “Kin,” the story of two best friends from Louisiana whose lives take divergent paths because of class, education and personal choices during the Civil Rights era. It is the first novel she has written since moving back to Atlanta after the success of her fourth novel, “An American Marriage.”
“I was being a Southern writer in exile, which is a school of Southern writing, but I feel like this book is the most traditionally Southern thing I have ever written, and I think it is because I am back home. Being in the North, I was losing my accent both literally and metaphorically,” Jones said.
While closing out the semester at Emory University, where she is a professor of English and creative writing, Jones balanced proofreading drafts of her book and signing 23,720 autograph cards with preparing for the holiday.
Her 55th birthday, right after Thanksgiving, came and went (she celebrated in December instead), but she was determined not to let work steal Christmas.
In September, she began writing the 500 Christmas cards she sends out each year, a practice that gives her the comfort of knowing that everyone on the list will hear from her at least once within a year.
Jones grew up in Cascade with her parents and two brothers. She also has two sisters who grew up in Louisiana. The Christmas celebrations of her childhood were joyful and included lots of presents, she said, but there weren’t a lot of rituals.
As an adult, Jones felt she had to have certain markers — a home, a spouse, a child or some other notice from society that her life was real — before she could enjoy a full-throttle expression of Christmas and truly feel a part of the season.
I could relate to this experience having spent many adult years traveling across the country on Christmas Day to be with family, convinced by movies, popular culture and the advent of the term “cuffing season” in the early 2000s that it wasn’t enough to celebrate the season alone. Even when I became a parent and a homeowner, that feeling was hard to shake.
“I think there is a persistent, stubborn resistance to the idea that other types of families are families, that other types of households are households,” Jones said. “If your family doesn’t check certain boxes, I don’t think people think it is real. That is another reason I decorate: My life is real and I need other people to know that their lives are real.”
Jones begins planning her Christmas decor six months in advance and keeps a notebook to record her vision of a perfect Christmas along with thoughts about what did or did not work the previous year.
Putting up a tree or decorating your home for the holidays is an act of creativity, she said.
On the main tree, golden acorns and pine cones mix it up with purple, red and teal orbs and the occasional floral. The other tree is more playful, with a nontraditional color scheme and ornaments that include a sparkly pink typewriter and Nutcracker mice.
The view from the outside at night is a spectacle that draws friends and family to stop in for quick visits and holiday parties replete with mulled wine, hot chocolate and gumbo. There is gift wrapping, bowmaking and the baking and eating of holiday cookies.
“I never would have thought I would be this person, but our friendships, family-ships, relationships are the most valuable thing we have,” Jones said. “Decorations are an outward representation of the feeling I have that we make the spirit of Christmas.”
Instead of allowing Christmas to remind us of what is missing in our lives or the areas where we believe we fall short, it can be the perfect moment to spread love to the people around us, whoever they may be, and embrace the season through our rituals and decorations.
“Usually when people say they aren’t decorating it is followed by an expression of disappointment, dissatisfaction or overwork,” Jones said. But once they do it, she said, “No one ever regrets it.”
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About the Author
Nedra Rhone is a lifestyle columnist for the Atlanta Journal-Constitution where she has been a reporter since 2006. A graduate of Columbia University School of Journalism, she enjoys writing about the people, places and events that define metro Atlanta.
