Zoo offers roaches, scorpions as Valentine's Day gifts for exes

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Want to gift your ex with something that tells them how you really feel? Look no further than the creepy crawlies offered at the San Francisco Zoo. The zoo is offering those feeling the sting of rejection a chance to "adopt" a hissing cockroach or giant scorpion to honor their exes on Valentine's Day.

For $50 and up, you can adopt a scorpion, and the zoo will send a stuffed stinger along with a certificate to the person of your choice, according to the zoo's Adopt-a-Scorpion website. The cockroach valentine will cost you about $25.

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"These invertebrates are aggressive, active and alarmingly nocturnal. Much like your low-life ex, they are usually found in and around low-elevation valleys where they dig elaborate burrows or 'caves,' " the zoo says on its promotion page for the desert scorpion. "Also just like you-know-who, when a suitable victim wanders by, the scorpion grabs the doomed creature with its pincers and stings the prey ... Charming."

The zoo's adopt-an-animal program usually raises money for more cuddly animals like penguins and pandas, but zoo officials decided that helping scorned lovers "never have to encounter a cockroach again" was fitting for Valentine's Day.