Cobb: I need a map, or maybe a compass

Could someone tell me why the roads in Cobb County are so confusing to the average driver? Well, maybe not to the average driver, but they are confusing to me.

I grew up in a town where most of the roads are laid out in a parallel pattern. As a consequence, it is very difficult for me to unlearn the straight path. I’ve discovered that roads here, for the most part, meander. They don’t always do the parallel thing.

Meandering roads might not be so bad, but in Cobb you could be driving along and the name of the road changes for no apparent reason.

For instance, Lower Roswell changes to Terrell Mill, which later becomes Delk if you’re not paying attention. Actually, Lower Roswell veers 90 degrees to the right where Terrell Mill begins and Terrell Mill veers 90 degrees to the left where Delk picks up.

For the longest time, I thought this same stretch of asphalt had three names.

And then you have the non-parallel and totally confusing 120 Loop. It does loop, but to what end? Is it a mini-perimeter around Cobb? No. Is it a northern or southern arc? No. It’s a loop that to my eye loops around I-75 only.

And this isn’t taking anything away from the fairly straight SR 120 that is really Roswell Road in the eastern part of the county and runs from the Big Chicken to the end of Cobb, whereupon it turns into Marietta Highway.

Lower Roswell Road is supposed to be the counterpoint to Roswell Road, which some people call Upper Roswell.

Because she has lived here since 1983, I challenged my wife recently to explain why we have an Upper Roswell and a Lower Roswell when that implies the two are parallel.

She informed me that they are parallel. Indeed, if you look at a map, the two are roughly parallel. (No, I do not have vertigo.)

Cobb also has a couple of roads that, by their very name, assert a positive direction. These would be Due West and the East-West Connector.

These roads approximate those directions, but in the final analysis, they just meander. Good luck reaching your desired compass point by traveling these misnomers.