Viral review prefers Ebola to Jason Aldean/Florida Georgia Line show

"I would gladly endure it all so long as I never again have to suffer the experience of sitting seven rows back from the stage while Florida Georgia Line and Jason Aldean gleefully danced on the grave of one of the most purely American forms of art to the tune of cheers from 9,999 very intoxicated people," reviewer  Jaime-Paul Falcon wrote in a piece that's been shared more than 40,000 times on Facebook and tweeted more than 1,000 times.

My colleague Melissa Ruggieri wrote a less hyperbolic review about a joint Aldean-Florida Georgia Line performance earlier this year, in which she focused her considerable skills as a seasoned music reviewer on the actual performance.

Here's a gallery of photos from that show.

Falcon, on the other hand, wrote about every aspect of the Dallas engagement with fervor. His withering review skewered just about every aspect of the show, starting with the pre-show tailgate scene ("Michelob Ultra was chugged as if it was a life-extending elixir of the gods, mini-barbecues raged and Florida-Georgia Line's "Dirt" was blasted at tornado siren levels) to the fans ("I swear it's like the people who love these songs don't realize that none of them are actually farmers. It took everything in me to not turn to the dad sporting Puma branded golf gear and point out that driving a truck does not automatically make one the Marlboro Man.")

Credit: Jennifer Brett

Credit: Jennifer Brett

Falcon didn't actually say much about Aldean's role ("Oh, and Jason Aldean played") but reserved his more colorful observations for Florida Georgia Line: "Tyler Hubbard of Florida Georgia Line looks like country music's take on Scott Stapp, with his flowing hair and affinity for bare skin and crosses.

While on stage he and Brian Kelley and the rest of the band all sported one of their own band's T-shirts. Yes, they're an entire band of 'that guys' ... Around the time Hubbard went shirtless and slammed a beer with Florida I started Googling "job opportunities + Presby Hospital."

Ouch!