Opinion: Give moms in America what they really need on Mother's Day

Every second Sunday in May, we celebrate mothers. We post tributes. We buy flowers. We send cards that say, “Thank you for everything.” But what if, this year, we did something different? What if, instead of just saying we value mothers, we started acting like it?

Because the truth is, being a mother in America is harder than it has to be. And while our politicians love to praise motherhood, they do far too little to support mothers in practice.

I write this not as a mother, but as a PANK — a Professional Aunt, No Kids — who has played an active role in helping to shape two extraordinary young women. My nieces — who are biracial and in my humble opinion resemble Meghan, the Duchess of Sussex in both beauty and grace — are now stepping into adulthood with purpose: One serves in the U.S. Military as a medic, the other is in the field of behavioral health. Although they are not yet mothers of children, I think about their future as moms all the time.

Watching them grow up has given me a front-row seat to the challenges my mother and other mothers have faced. It’s made me more passionate about ensuring that mothers aren’t just celebrated with flowers once a year, but supported every day with policies that honor their sacrifice.

Let’s start with what’s been happening lately. The President of the United States of America is considering offering women a $5,000 bonus to give birth — part of a broader push to boost declining birth rates and encourage “family values.” Then there’s the SAVE Act, championed as a way to protect election integrity but criticized for potentially targeting immigrant mothers and their children, as well as married women whose names no longer match those on their birth certificates (because of marriage). And let’s not forget the most sweeping change of all: the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade, allowing states to strip women of reproductive autonomy altogether.

On the surface, these moves are framed as “pro-family.” But dig deeper, and the picture becomes clear: This isn’t about supporting women — it’s about controlling them. It’s about encouraging childbirth without offering the infrastructure to support mothers after the baby arrives. And that, frankly, is the ultimate political bait-and-switch.

Here’s what being a mom in America really looks like in 2025:

Healthcare costs are sky-high, especially for maternal health, where Black and brown women are dying at disproportionately higher rates.
Child care costs more than college tuition in some places.
Paid maternity leave? Still not guaranteed.
Workplace flexibility? Only if you’re lucky.
College debt? Crushing.

And yet, we wonder why fewer women are choosing motherhood, or delaying it altogether.

If our elected officials are serious about making motherhood attractive, they need to stop offering crumbs and start serving a real meal. That starts with policies that respect women as whole human beings, not just vessels for childbirth. And by the way, women can do both, be successful in their careers and build a family too.

Imagine if we had:

Universal health care, so no mother has to choose between prenatal care and groceries.
Paid family leave, so women don’t lose their jobs or income just for giving birth.
Subsidized child care, so mothers can work without going broke.
Debt-free higher education, giving women more choices before and after motherhood.
Flexible work policies, so parenting doesn’t mean career suicide.

These aren’t radical ideas. They’re common sense. In fact, many countries around the world already offer these protections, and they’re seeing better health outcomes, happier families and more robust economies as a result.

But let’s be honest: In America, those ideas still feel out of reach. Why? Because helping mothers thrive isn’t politically convenient. It’s expensive. It requires sacrifice and long-term investment. And it means putting women’s well-being ahead of partisan wins.

Here’s what I know: Women are the backbone of our economy, our families and our communities. We are also the majority of voters in this country. So the question isn’t just what kind of policies we are offered. It’s what kind of policies we demand.

This Mother’s Day, don’t just send flowers. Don’t just post a filtered Instagram story. Call your member of Congress or U.S. senator. Write to your governor. Vote like your daughter’s future depends on it, because it does.

Motherhood is not a political football. It is a calling. A sacrifice. A daily act of grace and grit. If we truly believe it’s sacred, then it’s time to build a society that reflects that belief.

Happy Mother’s Day to the real heroes. May we finally start treating them like it.