As diners munch on salads and sandwiches in the main cafe, a group in the back room of Le Madeleine in Buckhead is chewing on a question.

"What is happiness?" is this night's menu selection, a topic chosen over several other suggestions, including "What is your true obligation when you make a promise?" and "Is there a middle ground between fiction and documentary?"

Participants in The Philosophy Cafe, like those in other similar groups around metro Atlanta, are attempting to revive the art of conversation.

Here's a question they could address: Why, in an age of instantaneous communication, do they feel that they have to hold a formal meeting in order to converse?

Author Stephen Miller offers a book-long answer in "Conversation: A History of a Declining Art." Conversation, he says, is suffering because much talk today consists of chatting politely, sharing secrets, pounding home a point of view or schmoozing to try to get ahead. There's very little in-depth exchange of ideas.

It wasn't always so. For centuries, according to Miller, gentlemen and ladies talked civilly about matters of life and art. They respected others' opinions.

Miller, 65, remembers gentler days himself. He wrote his book, he says, after becoming discouraged about the tone of current political talk while he researched conversation in Western civilization.

"I noticed that all the 18th-century writers wrote essays or even books about conversation," Miller said. "As I was writing . . . I was thinking about conversation in the present. . . .

It was getting very, very difficult to have a conversation about politics."

Or religion. Or money. Or global affairs.

The "balkanization" of reading and viewing habits compounded the difficulty, he said. People want to read and hear only the points of view of people who agree with them. Exposed to a different opinion, many respond in anger.

Another author, Christopher Phillips, was troubled by what he saw as the demise of philosophical exploration. Phillips embraced the Socratic view, as he puts it, that "every assumption. . . should always be questioned, analyzed, challenged. Nothing is ever resolved once and for all."

His book "Socrates Cafe" sparked the creation of philosophical conversation groups around the country.

New perspectives

Some metro Atlantans from various backgrounds share the concerns of Miller and Phillips. They've gathered strangers with similar interests in public places just to talk.

Why not just talk to relatives and friends?

"My family lives in Washington, D.C., and we don't talk about such things," said Steve Whiteman, a retired marketing professional who's in the Le Madeleine group. "As far as friends, this is a way to make friends."

Strangers become regulars, he said, and get to know one another. New people add interesting new perspectives.

The discussion subjects themselves, and the ground rules — no personal attacks, no monopolizing the floor — are the essence of the group.

"You're raising an issue and all contributing to the exploration of it," Whiteman said. "The nature of happiness is not something you talk about every day with anybody."

After hearing Phillips at an appearance in Atlanta two years ago, Christopher Lukas started his own version of a Socrates Cafe. Lukas, who uses the name "Christopher, Philosopher," calls his the Sustainable Society.

"The only rule is mutual respect," Lukas told a half-dozen people around a table at Jason's Deli in Buckhead as he introduced the subject he had chosen for the evening: education. They proferred definitions ranging from "a core curriculum of studies" to "knowledge passed on" to "experience."

Michael Yudanin, a native of the former Soviet Union who has also lived in Israel, said the word "doesn't trigger positive images in my mind." Nevertheless, he weighed in, "Education might be something like trying to help a person shape his fate, his future."

The discussion encompassed school budgets, government regulation, parental responsibility, unequal opportunities and evolving views of truth.

Group founder Lukas said the birth of a son earlier this year has strengthened his commitment to exploring issues through critical thinking. "If he can think things through, he might have a better chance of deciding in the long run what's best for him," Lukas said.

Energy of conversation

While Lukas' group is inclined toward broad subjects, Hands On Atlanta, a civic and volunteer organization, has used its Citizens' Cafe to explore issues more pertinent to life in the metro area. Sometimes experts are invited to help the conversation along. The Citizens' Cafe gatherings are on hiatus until January.

"We believe that once you're informed about a situation, you're inspired to do more about it," said Malikah Berry, director of community and civic engagement.

Hands On's cafe at Javaology, a downtown coffee shop near Georgia State University, has sponsored sessions on the long-term impact of the 1906 Atlanta race riot and on the effects of hip-hop culture.

"There's so much energy in conversation," said Berry. "The right topic and the right people becomes electric."

'A logjam breaker'

Steve Stokes, a car salesman in Gwinnett County, moderates the conversation at Le Madeleine. He became involved about seven years ago. Now he runs two monthly Philosophy Cafes, one in Lawrenceville and one in Buckhead. There are no fees or dues.

"The discussions work in a strange way for me," Stokes said. "They work as a logjam breaker for my thoughts. I find myself a couple of days later having insights on things totally unrelated to the topic that might have been discussed at the cafe."

Attendance varies from month to month. Participants choose the subject once they've gathered.

Bob Eskuchen, 28, a psychiatrist at Emory University, who was attending for the first time, brought up the happiness question. It was picked by popular vote.

"This is a very important question," Stokes told the group. "In this country, pursuit of happiness was one of the biggies."

The conversation meandered through such terms as "contentment," "joy," "elation" and "serenity."

"It's pretty safe to say happiness is a feeling," said Josh Johnson, 29, a software developer who lives in Canton. "If I feel good, is that enough?"

The group discussed why some people can seem happy in what others would consider impoverishment. Then it tackled the question of how much television influences people's quest for material goods.

"Maybe happiness has to do with the balance between your reality and your expectation," suggested Whiteman, the retired marketing director.

When time was almost up, Eskuchen summarized what he'd learned: "If I'm happy, I want to be alive. I'm enthusiastic about living."

Stokes, the group leader, looked at Eskuchen.

"Now," he asked, "did that make you happy?"

LOCAL GROUPS

Philosophy Cafe

7 p.m. second Wednesday of every month at La Madeleine, 35 W. Paces Ferry Road N.W., Atlanta

7:30 p.m. third Wednesday of every month at the Singin' Bean, 195-B N. Perry St. (Second Floor), Lawrenceville

For more information, e-mail philosopherknight@yahoo.com.

The Sustainable Society

7:30 p.m. second Tuesday of every month at Jason's Deli, 3330 Piedmont Road, Suite 3, Atlanta

For more information: www.christopherphilosopher.com or call 404-982-5486.

SOME WORDS ABOUT WORDS

"It is all right to hold a conversation, but you should let go of it now and then." — Richard Armour, American poet

"The true spirit of conversation consists in building on another man's observation, not overturning it." — Edward G. Bulwer-Lytton, English statesman

"Conversation is an art in which a man has all mankind for competitors."

— Ralph Waldo Emerson, U.S. author and philosopher

"Ideal conversation must be an exchange of thought, and not, as many of those who worry most about their shortcomings believe, an eloquent exhibition of wit or oratory."

— Emily Post, American etiquette expert

"She has lost the art of conversation, but not, unfortunately, the power of speech."

— George Bernard Shaw, Irish playwright

"Conversation may be compared to a lyre with seven chords — philosophy, art, poetry, politics, love, scandal and the weather."

— Anna Brownwell Jameson, Irish feminist writer

" 'Tis social converse animates the soul."

— Mercy Otis Warren, American patriot and author

"Conversation is an exercise of the mind; gossip is merely an exercise of the tongue." — Unknown

"Can we talk?"

— Joan Rivers, American comedian

Sources: quotationsbook.com; feminist.com; quotationspage.com; brainyquote.com