Last Thursday evening, I looked over at my husband, Jonee, and asked a question that had been nagging at me for nearly two days.

"Why haven't we talked about this?" I asked, as I raised the front page from the stack of newspapers piled up next to us and pointed to the headline "Obama Claims Nomination."

Now, I must point out that Jonee and I are not only former journalists, broadcast and print, respectively. We are pretty much the Webster's Dictionary definition of news junkies. We not only read three paper-and-ink newspapers and check online news sites several times a day, but Jonee is as addicted to Fox News as he is to MSNBC, to Rush Limbaugh as to NPR's Diane Rehm.

"Sure, we've talked about that," he replied incredulously. "Nearly nothing else."

But that wasn't true. I suddenly realized that the two of us black folks in America had talked with more joy and passion about Barack Obama when he was still running for the nomination than when he had clinched the deal. And unfortunately, we're not alone.

I've heard from my friends and read comments in the news media this week reflecting this same dichotomy. Articles in national and local newspapers and in chat rooms online quoted black folks from all over the country tempering their pride and hope with "Yeah, he got this far, but . . ." "I've had my dreams dashed before . . ." "Um-huh, maybe. . . ."

The media have played a part in this as well. Seemingly stung by accusations earlier in the campaign, from the Clinton camp as well as from comedians and late-night hosts, that they were playing favorites with their coverage of Obama, news shows and papers have seemed to bend over backwards in the last week to make up for perceived partiality. Some mornings, it was difficult to tell just who had actually nabbed the nomination, Hillary Clinton or Obama.

That may be a bit of an exaggeration. However, the response has been decidedly weak in the press considering that in the last few days we have the first black candidate ever to lead a major party in the history of this country. Ever.

A few months ago, when I was asked at a literary function if I thought Obama had a chance at winning the nomination, I have to admit I went with my gut and said, sadly, I did not think that most of white America and some of colored America were ready to consider a black candidate —- regardless of his or her credentials and abilities —- running for merely the highest office in the land.

Oops!

But now that I have been proven wrong about the nominee part, I must still wonder why I, like so many of my brothers and sisters, am still hesitating to light the fireworks, unequivocally celebrate this milestone in our multicultural combined journey for what it says about our country and our citizens.

Am I just too afraid to hope? Too jaded to believe? I hate to even consider it, but am I such a whipped dog that when I'm allowed a spot in the sun, a gentle smile, I'm too cowed to accept it, to believe it, to dare hope?

No matter how my views have been shaped, I feel like giving myself a good smack in the face. "Tina! Snap out of it!"

Look, I figure if in 1961, Robert F. Kennedy, a privileged if compassionate white New Englander, could envision a "Negro" being elected President of the United States "in 40 years," then I, a black middle-class if privileged Georgian in 2008, should be able to see a few months ahead to the possibility of that same bright future.

"Tina! Snap out of it!"

> Tina McElroy Ansa is a writer and publisher living on St. Simons Island.