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DEL.ICIO.USIs my dog teaching me how to be a good parent?
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
There are days when I think my paternal clock is ticking away and I am ready to become a father.
Fate, however, seems intent to show me why that should never happen. For example, when a little brat runs around wild or screams in a store and I’m prompted to say out loud: “Thank you for reminding me why I don’t have children.”
Then there is my dog, Jigger, who constantly tests my paternal instincts and skills.
About two weeks ago Jigger came down sick and just about solidified that I am just not cut out to be a parent.
On a normal day, Jigger, a border collie and black lab mix, is full of energy, dancing and running around with a big smile on his face.
To wake up the other morning and see him moving very slowly, his head hanging low and very gloomy look on his face, was quite alarming.
If he hadn’t eaten his treat or had needed to be carried I would have rushed him off to the emergency vet in a panic.
I did call my vet, who said it was probably some 24-hour bug and that Jigger should be given baby aspirin and a chicken and rice mixture. I did that, and the next day he was nearly back to good ol’ Jigger.
By the way I reacted you would have thought it was something more serious. I was nervous and kept running through all the possible causes for Jigger to come down sick. I thought about him all day. I was scared.
I mentioned to Jigger’s veterinarian how I thought this overreaction meant that I’m unfit to be a parent.
She couldn’t have disagreed more. She believes dog ownership can be the perfect training for parents and she made many comparisons between caring for a dog and a child.
I have at times referred to Jigger as my son and argued with other parents that he requires at times nearly as much responsibility as any child, but I never considered whether or not caring for him was appropriate training to be a parent.
My friends and family are split on whether the two are even remotely comparable.
Thinking about it, the requirements are similar: Love. Compassion. Patience. Understanding. Discipline. Time. Money.
Regardless of the number of times I have been told I would be a good father, I suppose I will really never know for sure until I am actually crazy enough to take that step.
So I ask you: What are the qualities of a good parent? Can raising a dog be good training for future parents?
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Comments
By Bruce Wilcox
April 8, 2007 11:28 PM | Link to this
Sure if you like playing fetch instead of pitch and catch.
By Katie
April 9, 2007 5:36 AM | Link to this
I love my furry children (my pets) and wouldn’t replace them for any human child any day. Good for you Woody, I’m glad Jigger is okay. Dogs greet you when you get home, snuggle with you when you go to bed and guard your house when your away. Personally, I don’t want children—they smell, are loud and obnoxious. I do think having a pet is a good prerequisite to having children though, it proves responsibility. If you can’t take care of a gerbile, cat or dog then you definately shouldn’t breed.
By KA
April 9, 2007 8:23 AM | Link to this
We had dogs and cats before and during child rearing, and the kids are grown and we still have 3 cats and two dogs (in a long procession of pets over the years. Yes, you learn responsibility in caring for and loving a pet, but the joys, trials and tribulations of parenthood are in another league altogether. Make sure you are both ready for a family before starting one. Children are not pets!
By landsaf
April 9, 2007 8:35 AM | Link to this
“Children are not pets”—No!, pets are friendlier and more disciplined! :)
I agree with Woody. When my husband and I even start to think about having a kid, we quickly load up and go to Walmart, the unruly kids with their lazy parents help us snap back to reality real quick!
By Kelley
April 9, 2007 8:36 AM | Link to this
Training a pet is similar to raising a child because you learn how to teach and reinforce good behavior. So you could consider having a pet as a baby step towards being ready to be a parent. The difference between the two, though, is that you go the extra step with a child and teach him/her morals, integrity and responsibility. These things are considerably more important than just good behavior alone!
By Casey
April 9, 2007 9:02 AM | Link to this
By looking at your picture, I can tell you don’t have to worry about getting a woman pregnant any time soon.
By Rob
April 9, 2007 9:10 AM | Link to this
I think the point here is that a pet is good training for raising children. I don’t think anyone is saying kids should be your pets, just that taking care of a living thing is good training. Pets need to be fed, cleaned up after, trips to the doctor, and love and general caring. How is that so different from a child?
By Georgia
April 9, 2007 9:19 AM | Link to this
Casey Why are you always so mean and hateful on these blogs? I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything nice in one of your posts.
I happen to think Woody is quite attractive…..
By KA
April 9, 2007 9:41 AM | Link to this
Rob, my point was that caring for a pet does teach responsibility, but that rearing children is a much larger endeavor, not to be embarked upon a whim. Parenting is exhausting, but totally rewarding as long as you never forget that love should guide all of your actions.
By Miss Manners
April 9, 2007 10:11 AM | Link to this
It would be a great 1st anniversary gift to a couple of newly weds.
By Katie
April 9, 2007 10:11 AM | Link to this
Casey, who are you to judge others? I bet you aren’t worth the air you breath. Woody may not have model looks and I’m sure you don’t either. Didn’t your momma ever teach you that if you don’t have something nice to say that you shouldn’t say anything?
By R N Atlanta
April 9, 2007 10:12 AM | Link to this
Good job and great topic Woody,
Ssssssssssssssssss, on the person who has not reached maturity and decided this was an open forum to remark about your looks. How snide of them and shallow. FYI - You get what you put out and it’s sad that you’re not mature enough to know what that means.
Getting back on topic, dogs do, and pets in general, make people better people.
The fact that a person acknowledges that the are not the center of the universe is confirmed by pet ownership.
Most parents would benefit tremendously from responsibly pet ownership prior to having kids. It is indeed great training!
Just My 2 Cents!
-Ron in Atlanta
By Alicia
April 9, 2007 10:12 AM | Link to this
I was a parent before I was a dog owner. Then I hated the idea of comparing kids to pets. Now I have a 9 year old son and a 1 year old pug. At times the similarities of the 2 are funny and mind blowing. When the dog was sick I was up all night with him as I have been with my son. I have taken my son to programs like soccer, football and basketball, I have taken the dog to dog training programs and pet parks. There is a line that I do think we often cross with our pets when they become important members of our families. When I only wish some people raise their children with the same kind of love and respect as people do their pets.
By R N Atlanta
April 9, 2007 10:17 AM | Link to this
Good job and great topic Woody,
Ssssssssssssssssss, on the person who has not reached maturity and decided this was an open forum to remark about your looks. How snide of them and shallow. FYI - You get what you put out and it’s sad that you’re not mature enough to know what that means.
Getting back on topic, dogs do, and pets in general, make people better people.
The fact that a person acknowledges that the are not they center of the universe is confirmed by pet ownership.
Most parents would benefit tremendously from responsible pet ownership prior to having kids. It is indeed great training!
Just My 2 Cents!
-Ron in Atlanta
By Opinionated
April 9, 2007 10:18 AM | Link to this
I think that pets are good training for becoming parents - especially when the pets are treated and cared for as if they are a part of the family. They are also a good way to train children in being responsible - if they are old enough to understand and handle the responsibility.
By R N Atlanta
April 9, 2007 10:21 AM | Link to this
Ssssssssssssssssss, on the person who has not reached maturity and decided this was an open forum to remark about your looks. How snide of them and shallow. FYI - You get what you put out and it’s sad that you’re not mature enough to know what that means.
Getting back on topic, dogs do, and pets in general, make people better people.
The fact that a person acknowledges that they are not the center of the universe is confirmed by pet ownership.
Most parents would benefit tremendously from responsible pet ownership prior to having kids. It is indeed great training!
Just My 2 Cents!
-Ron in Atlanta
By Jennifer
April 9, 2007 10:25 AM | Link to this
I’ve had pets my whole life, children for the last 5, and I assure you that pets don’t prepare you for having children!! Pets “grow up” a whole lot faster and always adore you. You can still be a kid yourself with pets, you grow up pretty fast when you have a kid to take care of.
About 6 years ago, my sweet prince (some call him a dog) had to spend a few days at the vet’s office for an illness, and it felt like my heart was being ripped out. I was bawling and my husband said “we are never having kids” and I ended up getting pregnant about 2 weeks later.
By Watching from Germany
April 9, 2007 10:34 AM | Link to this
I have lived in one of the most dog/animal friendly countries in the world. Never have I seen a dog with out a loving cargiver attached. Most Europeans are shocked to hear of US animal horor stories and sometime refuse to sell there beloved German Shepards to Americans. I just lost my son (15 year old Cocker)I brought him home at 6 weeks in my purse. He kept me sober( I was not a drunk, just would not stay as late at happy hour on Fridays)-he needed me and I needed him. He saved my life in a Earthquake, sat very close to me when I cried over my broken heart and I expected him to say something clever at any moment. I almost choked a Delta employee when he missed his international flight and he loved me even when I did not comb my hair. I have gone bonkers in the Emergency room and gently held him in my arms when he took his last breath. I can not write a check for the joy he brought to me. Kinda like a kid without the expensive tennis shoes, being told they hate you and sometimes wasting your hard earned dollars on College when all they want to do is play in a band. Did I mention he could sniff out a bad date?
Mom missing son~
By Michelle
April 9, 2007 10:35 AM | Link to this
Recently I was reading about this on-again, off-again couple who were talking about having a baby together. One of their friends offered that they should adopt a puppy first to see if they can raise some poor animal without killing it before these two idiots drag a baby into the world. Good advice.
By Casey
April 9, 2007 10:38 AM | Link to this
Georgia - if you “think Woody is quite attractive” - then you need to stop drinking so early in the day.
Katie - double talker you. Apparently your mamma didn’t teach you the adage: “if you don’t have something nice to say that you shouldn’t say anything” - since you were insulting in your post! If you’re gonna speak it, ACT IT b1tch!
R N Atlanta - Got a stuttering problem? Or are you just to stupid to know how to post just once?
By Renee
April 9, 2007 10:42 AM | Link to this
Hey Katie, aren’t you the person who was blogging last week about having sex with your brother? We were all trying to tell you how sick you were but you kept just spitting back at us. Are you still doing that?
By Kim
April 9, 2007 10:46 AM | Link to this
People who think that you can’t feel the same love and attachment to an animal as you would to a child have never experienced the pure, unadulterated love of an animal. I would have a pet instead of a child any day. I hate seeing animals looked at like second class citizens. They’re far more loyal and loving than most children I’ve met. And I could say that the “the joys, trials and tribulations of [pet] parenthood are in another league altogether” from child parenthood. They’re just not the same, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t love a pet just as much, if not more, than you love a child.
I think that both raising a child and raising a pet are good training for the other. Having raised a child successfully would make you a good candidate for owning a dog. There are, however, many people out there who have had children, but are NOT fit to own an animal, and vice versa. It’s all dependant upon you, the individual. Woody, your care and concern for Jigger is a testament to your wonderful character. I think you’d make a fine parent if your love and devotion to your child were even half of what you show for your pet. ;)
By Georgia
April 9, 2007 10:50 AM | Link to this
Casey Do you ever have anything nice to say? Or is your life so sad that you can’t stand others to be happy?
You strike me as a very sad and lonely person. You never say anything nice or worthwhile. If you don’t like the topic, then keep moving. You might want to try and find another way to release your anger. Anger management classes are all over the place.
You are more than welcome to post here IF you have anything of value to input. Otherwise, go back to bed, and see if you can’t find some happiness somewhere. Bless your heart.
By Richard
April 9, 2007 11:08 AM | Link to this
Kim, you need to get a life.
A pet doesn’t even compare to a human life.
By Casey
April 9, 2007 11:09 AM | Link to this
Georgia, is it Vodka, rum, bourbon, whiskey, …
What is it this morning that you’re drinking so fast?
By woodys mom
April 9, 2007 11:09 AM | Link to this
while there are some simularities to having a pet to rearing a child there are a world of differences. a pet can show you love and can be a test on trainng them to behave. thats where it ends. you have to be ready not only to raise the child but be ready for everything that comes with it. you cant just drop off the child at a dog pound when you realize you made a mistake. raising a child can bring you much joy and love. you have to be ready for a life time commitment. a dog is with you for 10 years or if lucky a few more than that. you have to be ready for the everything else that comes with having a child. yes you have to be ready for the noise and the misbehavor. i think that there is two flips to the coin when going to your local walmart or department store. yes they run through the stores screaming and pulling things off the shelves. but there are also the kids that most of us dont notice because they are well behaved and listen to their parents. they are the ones that we dont notice in the stores. my kids were well behaved in stores because i wouldnt stand for anything else. the question is can having a pet prepare you for parenthood.. the answer is yes and no. you can train a pet.. as you can raise a child to behave. but it doesnt prepare you for all the other things that come with being a parent. you have school, daily sports or after school activities and school trips. forget having a life of your own for the rest of your life. but having a pet cannot prepare you for some of the heart ache that comes with having a child. a child can show love like a pet can but a child can show you more pain that a pet never could. that is the biggest thing you have to deal with. can you handle the pain of being a parent. they make you so proud of them growing up. but animals dont lie, they dont take drugs and they dont say or do hurtful things. but a dog cant tell you they love you. they cant say happy mothers day or merry christmas. they cant hold you and tell you how much they need you or tell you how much you have done for them. they cant do the little things like dropping a note here and there just to say i love you. and they cant be there for you in your old age when you need the extra help. someone asked me if i had it to do all over again would i? yes i would.. whos going to take care of me when im old and cant walk or drive anymore.. i oneday will need someone to drive to the grocery store for me!
By Katie
April 9, 2007 11:17 AM | Link to this
Renee, No, I don’t have a brother to have sex with. Besides, I think sleeping with relatives is a Southern thing and I’m a California native. We sleep with everyone except our family members. Nice thought though. Casey, I guess you did see my point then. Others can say snappy things just like you, however, you can dish it but have a hard time taking it. Grow up. And please don’t breed, stick to pet ownership.
By observer
April 9, 2007 11:17 AM | Link to this
Kim, I guess the animals are lucky to be treated as “second class citizens” as you say, since a dog is not a citizen at all. Did you not know that??
By go casey
April 9, 2007 11:19 AM | Link to this
Casey, While I think you may be being a little nasty, at least you are speaking the truth.
By Katie
April 9, 2007 11:19 AM | Link to this
Richard, I am one of the people in the world that values animals as highly as humans, if not more so. Animals don’t steal (except for those darn ferrets), lie or cheat. Over all they would make better citizens and neighbors than many humans would.
By Opinionated
April 9, 2007 11:20 AM | Link to this
Very well said woodys mom. I’ve either been around pets or had pets my whole life. Currently I have 4 cats (or I should say they have me !! LOL)and 4 gerbils and one great daughter. The pets bring me a lot of joy but my daughter has brought me the most joy in my life - even though there have been ups and downs.
You really cannot compare raising pets and raising children although you CAN apply some of the knowledge you learned from raising pets to raising children.
By katie is a nut
April 9, 2007 11:21 AM | Link to this
Katie, Please get yourself some help.
By DwayneL
April 9, 2007 11:30 AM | Link to this
I am not a “pet” person and I just don’t understand why some people need to have a pet. I get a kick out of seeing people with dogs in cars or carrying them into stores like kids. Their ANIMALS people…leave them at home where they belong. I guess I have never been so emotionally unstable or needy that I required an animal to fill a void. I guess I will never understand.
By Jennifer
April 9, 2007 11:34 AM | Link to this
I try to see the good in animals and people. I have my bitter moments but man is life better when I see the good things!
By DwayneL
April 9, 2007 11:34 AM | Link to this
Also, comparing a dog to a person or “citizen” as one person mentioned is just plain crazy. In some countries their called “dinner”!
By woodys mom
April 9, 2007 11:40 AM | Link to this
dwanyneL, if you have never had a pet i can see why you dont understand it. a pet is a loyal loving companion. they are usually loyal and devoted to their owners. they will protect you and stay by your side. which is more than i can say for alot of people. treat them right and take care of them properly.. feed them love them and you will be rewarded.. we are on our fourth golden retreiver.. we lost all of our beloved pets to old age. they stayed by my side and were loyal companions to me till the day they died. thats why people treat them as family members.. its because they are family members. can you count on all of your family memebers or freinds to be that loyal?
By DwayneL
April 9, 2007 11:47 AM | Link to this
Woody’s mom: Good points and I do understand the loyalty part. However, I keep thinking about something I saw in another blog from an animal rights person..she said that if to avoid a major accident by swerving her car to the right or left and a child was on the right and a dog on the left, she would swerve right and kill the child to save the dog. That’s just insane and I personally think a person who thinks like that needs serious mental help!!
By JustMe
April 9, 2007 11:53 AM | Link to this
I cannot believe that there is even a comparison here!
Having a pet simply takes discipline on the owners part - to feed, clean, etc. There is so much more to being a parent - teaching manners, morals, ethics, etc.
I would say that if an adult cannot handle a pet, then they cannot handle a child. But one can handle a pet without being able to handle a child.
By Casey
April 9, 2007 12:19 PM | Link to this
Katie - are you one of those freaky women that has 50 cats?
Or do you have dogs and have taught your lab how to hump you and that’s why you love animals so much?
By Georgia
April 9, 2007 12:34 PM | Link to this
EVERYONE Ignore the troll who is posting under “Casey”. Don’t bite. This person is just trying to get everyone upset.. You know the old saying “Misery LOVES company”.
By GatorFan
April 9, 2007 12:47 PM | Link to this
If you get a pet because you think it will help prepare you for parenthood, you are a fool. All it does is give to responsibilities that you could have lived without until you had children. It is like preparing for running a marathon by running one mile everyday.
By dawgdan
April 9, 2007 1:22 PM | Link to this
GatorFan, running one mile every day is a better start than not running at all.
I don’t have children, but we did get a new puppy a few weeks ago. She’s a handful, but I know that children are a much greater responsibility. Nonetheless, she is teaching us how to be responsible for more than just ourselves. It’s a start, you know?
By Casey
April 9, 2007 1:24 PM | Link to this
Well Georgia, I guess you do love company! That’s why you drink so much, I guess.
By LM
April 9, 2007 1:34 PM | Link to this
Woody’s Mom, you are so right. I don’t think pets prepare you for parenthood, but I believe someone who is willing to do all that a pet requires has the potential to be a good parent because they have learned to do for someone/something without necessarily getting something immediately in return, kind of like having a teenager.
I have always had some type of pet, cats or dogs for the most part, fish, gerbils, a ferret and now horses. Each of those pets holds a place in my heart. I cried a mourned the lose of each one. The last pet has been the hardest to get over, and I still hurt at her death.
My daughter is so much more work, effort and requires a whole lot more patience than any of the pets and in return I hope to one day reap the rewards of a well adjusted, productive adult. We have to struggle through these teenage years before we ever find out if I been successful. Having an adoring pet to love unconditionally and who wants my attention, has allowed me to give my daughter some room to breathe and I am not in her business 24/7. Also as a teenager she does not want the physical closeness we used to have, hugs and kisses, back rubs, snuggling on the sofa, a pet does.
By Dawn
April 9, 2007 1:38 PM | Link to this
I have a dog. I have a child (and 3 stepchildren). Both present challenges, but they are very different. But those who talk about unruly children, goodness…. I walk through my subdivision with my dog and there are tons of unruly dogs. I don’t think that having a pet prepares you for parenting a child. It is comparing apples to oranges. However, I wouldn’t trade either experience as they both provide different things. And for those who go in public to scare themselves straight in regards to kids…..I walk through the stores and malls with my children and they are amazed at what other children are able to get away with. A child is as unruly as a PARENT allows them to be. So don’t let other kids be a deterrent.
By Donna P.
April 9, 2007 1:43 PM | Link to this
WOW, my husband and I are going through this right now. Last October, a stray dog wondered into our yard, to make a long story short, he was rescued then purchased at a Petsmart then the “owner” dumped him in our neighborhood. He is a GREAT dog and I am glad we own him. He has brought so much joy to our lives. Then two weeks ago, another stray was dumped in our neighborhood. Another neighbor tried to take her in but wasn’t able to so we have her until her “owner” is located. We don’t have any biological children but have two great dogs. We have them both on eating and bathroom schedules and make sure they have play time with us and are included in our daily lives as members of our family. I don’t know if they are preparing us for parenthood but we have changed our lives to accommodate them to make them feel wanted and to me, that is a big part of being a parent.
By Bruce Wilcox
April 9, 2007 1:49 PM | Link to this
Dogs behave better than many who have commented here, it would be an interesting study to find out how many of the inane commentors parents ever had pets?
And I thought the school holiday was over.
By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 1:51 PM | Link to this
I’m not sure ANYTHING can prepare you for parenthood. You can read book after book, solit advice from parents, but I don’t think anything can actually prepare you to become a parent. It’s a step by step learning process.
Hi LM and Opinionated Haven’t see ya post in a while. How are your kids?
I see Casey is trolling again with nothing to offer AS USUAL……
By Divaonly
April 9, 2007 1:55 PM | Link to this
Yes, a baby can’t talk either. A parent needs to be cognizant of different behavioral patterns. Your attentiveness to his droppy head and gloomy look was definitely a different behavior. Uncaring or too busy people would not have noticed or cared. Keep up the good work!
Love and compassion, the rest will come, ONCE THEY START TO TALK.
By Katie
April 9, 2007 1:56 PM | Link to this
Casey, no, I don’t own cats. 50 of anything would be too much. Why so extreme? I say I like animals more than humans and people think I’m either crazy and need help or that I’m a cat freak. Are we not individuals with free will and thought? I read somewhere that I had a right to my beliefs—that’s right, the Constitution!!! I guess down here in the bible belt I’m considered the devil, well hail satan then.
By kellybell
April 9, 2007 2:06 PM | Link to this
this is a funny subject.. i don’t have any kids right now but i do have two dogs.. we have a year and a half rat terrier and a six week old pek-a-chi.. i swear having a puppy in the house is almost like having a newborn.. in some ways :) i constantly have to watch the puppy to make sure everything is ok.. she weighs all of 2 lbs so she is very delicate.. if i didn’t have my dogs i wouldn’t know what to expect with a newborn!! having pets teaches responsibility.. the rattie was sick for a bit.. we had to take her to the vet several times and it was just like take a child to the dr.!!
for pet lovers our pets are our kids!! plus i’m only 24 and not ready for human babies yet :)
By LM
April 9, 2007 2:15 PM | Link to this
Hey Ms. Jones, did your daughter have a good spring break? How about you, did you get some me time? AB/DC was so sweet this weekend it was like having a different child, I really enjoyed her this weekend. I also can’t wait I am getting my new puppy the begining of May, so excited!
By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 2:20 PM | Link to this
Hey LM we did have a good spring break. She and I went to Six Flags on Wednesday. Perfect timing, no crowds. The longest we waited in line was 20 minutes. She was supposed to bring a friend, but her friend got sick so it was just the two of us. As we were standing in one roller coaster line, she said the sweetest thing to me….”I’m kinda glad my friend got sick, and it’s just you and me”. I darn near fell over to hear those words come out of her mouth. Other than that, yes I did get some “me” time in, she worked alot.
How was your spring break?
By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 2:23 PM | Link to this
Oh yea, we got a puppy back in January, to keep our 7 year old lab company. The puppy is a chichuahua mix with some shepard and chow. She is so cute, and just turned 16 weeks. It’s like having a toddler in the house again. I have to constantly pull stuff out of her mouth (everything and anything on the floor is fair game), taking her outside to get on a routine, scolding her, etc. LOTS of work…….but I am loving it.
We also have two cats and one beta fish. The animals out-number the humans in my house……
By Opinionated
April 9, 2007 2:26 PM | Link to this
Hey, LM and Ms Jones, my daughter is great now that she’s back home from her father’s. I really missed having her around - it’s going to even worse this summer ‘cuz she will be gone for 7 weeks! Thanks for asking. How’s yours doing?
I’m really looking forward to having warm weather again…
By LM
April 9, 2007 2:39 PM | Link to this
Opinionated I can’t even imagin not seeing my daughter for a week, let alone 7. But I did threaten her that if she could not live by our rules in our house, she was more than welcome to see if the rules in her fathers house were more to her liking. I stayed inside all weekend, just could not face the cold. Also I was recovering from a reaction to my allergy shots, ugh was missery.
Ms. Jones I just can’t wait for the new baby. Long story short, I have a 6 yo Greyhound and on December 29th we lost our 1 1/2 year old chinese crested. The pain has been horrible. I contacted the breeder and she was ready for another breed cycle, she does not breed every heat cycle. So I could end up with a full brother or sister to my Zoe. Since she died my SO wanted a “manly” dog so he got a sweet Blue Heeler, 3 1/2 male. But it was not the same. The Greyhound is a “mothering” girl and he is beyond that. I also miss haveing the little dog to cuddle up with, she was a great distraction to all the stress of teenager, work and parents. We also have 7 horses and two ferrel cats. So I am with Opinionated the animals out number the humans
By Opinionated
April 9, 2007 2:56 PM | Link to this
Yeah, LM, it is very hard to have my daughter gone that long - been doing this for 8 years now and it doesn’t get any easier. The good thing, however, is that she sees how good she has it with me because I devote a lot of time to her where he doesn’t spend any time (although, I am stricter than my ex). I swear that he only takes her so that I won’t have her. I have only once or twice threatened her with living at her father’s (only when things got really bad) and it straightened her up real quick.
I’m sorry about your losing your dog. It is really a tough thing to go through. I had two siamese that died within months of each other: one died of feline leukemia and the other got loose (both were indoor only cats) and was hit by a car. It devastated me so I can understand what you are going through.
However devastated I was at losing my cats, I would be 100 times worse if anything were to happen to my daughter.
By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 2:59 PM | Link to this
I’m not sure about 7 weeks either. Sometimes it sounds wonderful to have that much time to yourself, but I would get lonely and start to miss my kid after the first couple of days. You fall out of the comfort zone of a routine……But, on the other hand, I could go get a pedicure without having to pay for her manicure, watch what I want on ANY tv in the house, get on the computer any time I wanted…..eat dinner in the bedroom, that kind of stuff…….
What kind of things do you do when your daughter is away that long?
By Opinionated
April 9, 2007 3:01 PM | Link to this
Ms Jones, well I work a lot! Clean the house top to bottom. Watch T.V. - stuff that she can’t watch. And most of all MISS HER!
By LM
April 9, 2007 3:04 PM | Link to this
Good question, what do you do when you child is away for so long? Mine may go 6 times a year for a weekend with her father, but that is not long enough to change a routine. But than again, between work, parents, dogs and horses, we don’t have much time to get a new routine. By SO loves it when she is with her father because he can walk around the house in his tighty whities…lol
By Opinionated
April 9, 2007 3:11 PM | Link to this
LM, can I just say “eeeyyyeewww”! :) LOL
By LM
April 9, 2007 3:15 PM | Link to this
Yeah, I know.
By sharon bowick
April 9, 2007 3:27 PM | Link to this
Like are you hurting for an article or what???? Remember pets will NEVER break your heart, borrow money, or wreck your car!!!!By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 3:30 PM | Link to this
AND if your pet gets pregnant, you can sell their kids…….
By Opinionated
April 9, 2007 3:31 PM | Link to this
OR give ‘em away to whomever wants them!!
By LM
April 9, 2007 3:39 PM | Link to this
and wont put you in a crapy home when you get older.
By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 3:39 PM | Link to this
When we brought our new puppy home, we put her in the back yard, and brought out our 7 year old Lab. Those two dogs took to each other, like they were mom and pup, meant to be together. The little one follows the Lab all around the house. They sleep together, eat together, and play together. They also pounce on the cats together. They are so cute. The puppy mellowed the Lab out big time. I never in my wildest dreams thought I would have two dogs, but I love them so much. I feel like a puppeteer when walking both of them together. The Lab is good on a leash, but the puppy is still learning, and runs up under the Lab. We have to stop every so often and untangle the dogs……it’s hysterical…..
By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 3:43 PM | Link to this
Or crap in your home……ha ha
By LM
April 9, 2007 3:55 PM | Link to this
walking the greyhound and the chinese crested was like trying to walk to drunked toddlers, just wrong. The greyhound never raced because she would not walk on a leash, I got her very young at 22 months. This new boy the blue heeler, walks under the greyhound all the time, and he is a brute, very solid, I get worried he will break her leg with the force he uses. I took them to PetSmart a few weeks ago and they did pretty good on leash with just me, I was very suprised. Things will get very interesting once the new puppy arrives, this one might be 2 lb when I bring it home, the greyhound is 69 lbs, and the blue heeler is 52 lbs. The greyhound and the blue heeler don’t plan or sleep together, but Zoe used to sleep and play with the greyhound all the time. Even when the prey instinct hit when we had the girls out at twilight for a potty break, that is the only time the prey drive got the better of the greyhound and she would race at Zoe roll her over, Zoe got to be really fast.
I’ll need name ideas when I get the new baby, not sure yet if it will be a girl or boy, and this will be the powder puff again, like Zoe.
By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 5:01 PM | Link to this
That’s funny. My Lab rolls one of my cats as they race towards the back door. The cats are indoors, but get to go out back once a day and eat grass. The two cats, and the two dogs hear the garage door opening, and everyone greets me at the door, then they all shoot to the back door because they know they get to go outside. My 20 lb cat gets rolled by the 80 pound Lab…..too funny.
See that’s why I love my animals, they provide so much free entertainment. I feel bad for people who don’t have/want pets. They are missing out on so much free/unconditional love……
By Last American
April 9, 2007 5:01 PM | Link to this
WATCHING FROM GERMANY - MY SINCERE HEARTFELT SORRY FOR THE LOSS OF YOUR DOG. I HOPE YOU HAVE OR WILL TAKE ANOTHER ONE INTO YOUR LIFE. I HAD TO PUT MY FIRST DOG (YANKEE) AGE 11 TO SLEEP - THAT WAS 11 YEARS AGO.
Since I’ve never had children - not by choice - I can not answer the question. Well, maybe in one way. I have two Dachunds - one male (Smitty) age 11 and one female (Tickles.) age 3. By the way I take care of them and love them with all my heart - I guess I would have been a good Mother. Also, no matter how old a dog is - they are still like little pups.
By Ms. Jones
April 9, 2007 5:07 PM | Link to this
My daughter picked out a name before we picked out the puppy. She wanted a boy doggie and picked Amore to be it’s name. We brought the girl puppy home, and Amore just didn’t fit her. We tried for two weeks to find a name that fit her personality, and guess what? She is an Amore. Every time I call her, I hear Dean Martin singing “That’s Amore”…..
By LM
April 9, 2007 7:46 PM | Link to this
Ms. Jones too funny, everytime I read Amore’s name I kept hearing the theme to Moonstruck, what that Dean Martin?
AB/DC named Zoe, I perfer non-people names.
By KK
April 9, 2007 9:14 PM | Link to this
Hey Woody, I have an 8 month old puppy and I love him so much! He’s my baby bear!! He got sick and I paniced too!! I am always excited to get home and see him. I just love having him, he’s better than a child…not as needy and even more cute.
And for Casey, dont worry about him, I think you look good!!
By GatorFan
April 9, 2007 9:14 PM | Link to this
dawgdan-
You are missing my point. Running one mile might be better than nothing, but it still gets you nowhere near where you need to be.
By Gate Key
April 9, 2007 10:29 PM | Link to this
I have two dogs and a cat but no children. I love my animals dearly and my husband and I want to have children in a few years. I think there’s definitely one way that having pets won’t prepare you for having kids. Dogs especially are generally pretty obedient and as many posters have written love you no matter what. Children are people with minds and questions the ability to think on their own. I think some parents aren’t prepared that their children won’t be “obedient puppies” forever. If you’re looking for someone to love on or fill some void in your life - you don’t need to have kids. Have children if you’re looking to bring another person into this world and watch them grow into a free-thinking, independent adult. I look forward to showing my kids the world and teaching them to think for themselves and make good responsible decisions. And no matter how much I love my doggies - they will always be completely dependent on me.
By Deborah Smith-Callahan
April 9, 2007 11:00 PM | Link to this
As the head of a local rescue group, we would never underestimate the valuable learning experiences gained from owning a pet. A word of caution, however. One of the top reasons people provide when dropping off dogs and cats at shelters is that they now have young children and don’t have time/patience/money (pick one) to care for both. Please don’t adopt a pet solely as a substitute or in preparation for a child. While their lives may not have the same value as humans (why does there have to be a comparison?), once you bring them into your homes they should be viewed as members of your family and you should be prepared for a life-long commitment.
By Stacy
April 10, 2007 1:08 AM | Link to this
Thank you, Deborah, for making an excellent point. I was a pet owner long before having kids (twins who are now 19 months old). I used to volunteer for a Humane Society and would cringe at the people who dumped their pets as if having kids were a justified reason for doing so. Now that I have my own kids and meet other new parents, I still unfortunately run across people whose pets are mysteriously gone from their lives now that they have children. Yes, it is harder to take care of my pets now that I have toddlers, but it doesn’t erase my responsibility to the pets I CHOSE to bring into my life. The pet owner, and NO ONE else (not a rescue group, a shelter, the Humane Society, etc.) is responsible for his or her pets. If you know you want kids sometime in the next 15 or so years, don’t get a pet if you feel pets and children are incompatible.
By Watchin from Europe
April 10, 2007 4:34 AM | Link to this
Thanks Last American! I got to stop talking to that Urn… ;o) I track the puppy and rescue internet sites here in Europe and figure our eyes will me and I will scoop a little one up and give them a good home. We do not clip tails or ears here-considered in humane to the animal. Your 4 legged kids sound well adjusted and you sound happy! I too made a choice, and I am happy with it!
By Casey
April 10, 2007 8:04 AM | Link to this
Hey LM, Opinionated and Ms. Jones - are you three to cheap to get on a phone call or just meet? The rest of the people on this blog aren’t interested in your stupid little chat. Take it offline.
By go casey
April 10, 2007 8:55 AM | Link to this
I was thinking the exact same thing, Casey. I’m just skipping their posts now. How boring.
By JJ
April 10, 2007 9:19 AM | Link to this
It’s a little early to be jealous isn’t it? That green eyed moster rears it’s ugly head before 9:00. Pity.
I happen to enjoy the friendship that seems to have sprung up in this blog. Maybe the three of them should meet, they seem to enjoy each other and have alot in common…..
Casey and Go Casey Bless your little hearts. So much jealousy, so little time. You can’t be happy unless your are making someone miserable. Poor babies…..I feel sorry for you two children. Now go take your naps and hopefully you will wake up with a better attitude.
By me too!
April 10, 2007 9:44 AM | Link to this
JJ, while Casey and Go Casey might not be very nice in their comments, there is some truth to what they are saying. Who want to hear about somebody’s man walking around in his underwear (on a blog about pets at that)? I just gotta say, these three have got to be the most boring people ever grace this blog.
By go casey
April 10, 2007 9:47 AM | Link to this
JJ, if you are trying to be cute, trust me, you are not pulling it off. I don’t think anybody is jealous of anybody else on this blog (don’t even know them). Boring is boring no matter how you slice it. Now you go play—-bless your little heart.
By Last American
April 10, 2007 9:50 AM | Link to this
DEBORAH SMITH CALLAHAN - How True - once a couple have children - you never hear about their dogs any longer. No more walks - no attention -just forgotten about.
By JJ
April 10, 2007 10:18 AM | Link to this
me too! If you don’t like it, please feel free to leave. No one is forcing you to read these comments or making you stay in this particular blog.
If you happen to find inter-blog conversations boring, well then move along to another blog. Or start your own Complaining blog…..
No need for nastyness. Please move on!!
By Deb
April 10, 2007 10:18 AM | Link to this
Good grief, how blogs deteriorate quickly. Honestly, learn to ignore the LOSERS like repulsive Casey and stick to the topic! Folks that shoot dagers are not worth the time it takes to type a reply! GEEZ!
By go casey
April 10, 2007 10:31 AM | Link to this
Deb, you say stick to the topic. Please tell me what some man walking around in his underwear when his children are not there has to do with animals. Are the rules like stick to topic just for the folks you don’t like? Too bad- there’s nothing you can do about it. Invite anybody to leave you feel like it. That won’t make them leave. Of course, you could always leave if you don’t like it.
By Go Away Casey and Fellow Trolls
April 10, 2007 10:37 AM | Link to this
MMMMMMM Men in underwear……..YUMMY!
Boxers, not briefs……..
By stick to topic
April 10, 2007 10:40 AM | Link to this
So when is everyone going to start sticking to the topic? What you did on spring break, or what you do when your children are not there are neither the topic. Oh but I guess it’s ok for some people to talk about anything and everything, but some folks need to stick to the topic. I think that it is pretty nasty to start calling people losers just because they have a different opinion than you. And by the way, calling people losers is also off topic, Deb. And by the way, this is my first post, so I am not one of the people “shooting daggers” as you say. Everyone has a right to post, this is not your personal blog.
By what???
April 10, 2007 10:43 AM | Link to this
I’m thinking that Go Away Casey and Fellow Trolls has got some issues. Hubby not performing so good anymore? If he was you might not think men in their sweaty drawers is quite so yummy. You might also want to take a look in the mirror.
By One-Trick Casey
April 10, 2007 10:46 AM | Link to this
At least get a new trick, Casey, you are more boring and predictable than anything else on here. Full of p** and vinegar, ok, we get it. Don’t like anything or anyone, nothing constructive or useful to offer, but yet you’re the first to gripe about people not staying on topic. At least you have somewhere to feel important because if you run around town running your mouth the way you run your fingers on here, you’d be missing a couple of teeth.
By Smitty
April 10, 2007 10:56 AM | Link to this
I got me a new puppy last week. Ugly has h3ll, and mean as sin, so I named her Casey.
She likes my underwear too.
By oh yeah?
April 10, 2007 11:11 AM | Link to this
Smitty, What is this relationship you have with your dog? Why is she so fond of your underwear?
By Shannon, M.Div.
April 10, 2007 11:22 AM | Link to this
I think the question is whether there is a qualitative difference between pet ownership and child-rearing or merely a quantitative difference. That is, is it merely a matter of degrees? Do pet ownership and child-rearing tap into the same set of responsibilities and skills? No one would argue that child-rearing uses those skills and requires those responsibilities to a deeper degree, but the question is whether child-rearing actually requires different skills/responsibilities.
Framing the question that way, I have to say that the largest difference is constancy. With my beloved cats, my husband and I can go a few days just feeding them, watering them, and changing their litter—in short, taking care of their physical needs and letting other perceived needs go. Could we do that with a child? No. Most days, I love on my cats, play with them, “talk” to them, but if a few days go by that they don’t receive that tangible love, we’re all still okay.
I would have to argue for a qualitative difference—it’s not just a matter of degree, but child-rearing requires a level of committment that pet-ownership simply doesn’t. It doesn’t mean pet-irresponsibility; it just means that pets need less than kids. And thank God for it.
By Kathy
April 10, 2007 1:59 PM | Link to this
I think cats may not offer a good example since they’re such solitary, independant animals. Animals that take more responsiblitiy to care for may be a better option to compare to child rearing, if we go so far as to compare pet ownership with parenting. How about reptiles (so fragile), salt water fish or eels (very hard to care for, Ph of the water) parrots (so prone to abnormal behaviors) and other animals that need constant care. Those may be better examples to use. Does anyone have any of these types of pets that can offer some details? I had a salt water tank (600 gallons) and I know it was a very time consuming and if I wanted to keep my very expensive fish alive I needed to monitor it very closely and it was a responsibility. I don’t have children though so I can’t say whether or not one can be compared to the other.
By oh yeah, the jerk
April 10, 2007 3:14 PM | Link to this
oh yeah, did you get a big dog just so it can hump you when you bend over?
Get a life.
By oh yeah?
April 10, 2007 3:42 PM | Link to this
To oh yeah, you jerk…. I don’t have a dog at all. You are the one with the dog that likes to sniff you underwear, not me. So it sounds like maybe you should get a life or maybe a man.
By JJ
April 10, 2007 3:57 PM | Link to this
Children, children, stop with the nasty insults. I thought this was an adult blog. The last few comments are rather childish don’t you think?
GROW UP!!!!
By AJC GWINNETT NEWS
April 10, 2007 5:06 PM | Link to this
PLEASE NOTE THAT COMMENTING ON THIS BLOG WILL BE SHUT DOWN IF COMMENTS ARE NOT APPROPRIATE FOR MINORS.
By Magenta
April 10, 2007 11:15 PM | Link to this
I disagree on two levels.
First, pets are not people. I always had pets, but the birth of my child brought the same amount of panic that every new parent experiences. I also discovered that childless pet lovers (such as one friend who came to visit) are off in la-la land when it comes to trying to give advice. There’s no link between the love for your pets and ability to parent because this same friend had 2 pomeranians that were spoiled beyond belief and absolutely impossible to be around.
Also, no matter what you do, you can’t “practice” parenthood. My son’s father and I were foster parents to a teenager that we cared a great deal for…but again, parenthood happened and we still felt totally unprepared. Even now that my son is a teenager himself, there’s little in my fostering experience that I can call on for guidance. Every parent starts at Square One.