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DEL.ICIO.USWhen the start of R&R brings the end closer
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Every wife with a deployed husband knows what R&R means — having your husband home for two blissful weeks.
But there’s much preparation before he gets here. You tell everyone he’s coming home, you work out like a fiend, you buy new clothes, you clean every crevice of your house, you make plans for what you’ll do while he’s here, and when the long-awaited day finally comes, you show up at the airport hours before his flight arrives.
I was in the arrivals area pacing and bothering the volunteers at the USO booth until they informed me my husband’s flight had landed. I was so excited that the moment he walked in I threw myself into his arms and unexpectedly burst into tears from the sheer joy of seeing him again. Even after months away, it was as if he’d never left.
We did all our favorite things, talked into the wee hours of the night and savored every moment together.
Two weeks becomes mere days, and then stark reality hits and you’re packing up his things and taking him to the terminal to report for duty again.
Fortunately, the airport allows wives to go to the gate with their soldiers. I guess they know we need every precious moment we can squeeze out of their time here. As the hours pass and boarding time nears, the tears you were able to stifle earlier start trickling until you’ve run through all the Kleenex and your husband can’t hold back his either.
He promises he’s coming back and tells you how much he loves you. You send the man you love back to war knowing it’s one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. Then, the wait for him to come home starts all over again.
How did you spend your R&R? Was your husband leaving after R&R harder than him shipping out initially?
Permalink | Comments (8) | Categories: Andie Heffernan
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By Jack
March 21, 2007 3:28 PM | Link to this
I served 4yrs active duty in the U.S. Marine Corps and 2yrs active duty in the U.S. Army and was in the military during Desert Storm and i can tell you that it is extremely painful when you have to ship out. It rips your heart and guts out. It is equally as hard the first time as it is when you come home for a short time and then ship back out again. Being a man I can tell you that I cried my eyes out every time I had to leave my family, wife and kids. I can only imagine the pain and tears that the service men and women are feeling during this war because this time it is real, death, brain injuries, dismemberment, lose of limbs, ect. Imagine kissing your wife and kids for what could be the possible last time that you do. The “not knowing” whether you will come home alive or come home with a sever injury or come home mentally screwed up makes leaving and saying goodbye even harder. It’s emotional warfare for both the service member and his family. So not only are you fighting a war but your also fighting a personal from within mental war. I cry, feel for and pray for all the men and women in uniform. Thank God for everyone of them……..Also Your R&R whether it is two weeks or one year, it flies by almost to feel like seconds instead of days. When you know that you face going back to something like war, their is NEVER enough time with your loved ones. I could not even begin to imagine the pain of kissing my beautiful wife and daughters goodbye for what might be forever….
By Kristy
March 21, 2007 4:18 PM | Link to this
Wow, what a way to describe it. To the soldiers and their family members - thank you for your sacrifices. There are many who appreciate you.
By A Supporter
March 21, 2007 4:42 PM | Link to this
And I have trouble sending my wife away on a weekend retreat? Military spouses like Mrs. Heffernan display unbelievable strength and grace during these deployments, and deserve all the support that can be afforded not only by the military, but by their friends, neighbors and communities. In the recent movie “Gladiator”, the title character used the phrase “Strength and Honor” as recognition for his comrades-in-arms. I think “Strength and Honor” is a fitting tribute not only for servicemen, but for their families as well.
By Richard
March 21, 2007 9:36 PM | Link to this
God bless our men and women serving abroad and at home!
By Jenna Hagin
March 21, 2007 10:49 PM | Link to this
When my husband came home for R&R we spent every waking moment with eachother and our little girl. We to stayed up most of the night just talking as if he where never gone. Katie (our daughter) never skipped a beat she jumped right in as if he never left which made us feel alot better.Of just as you said two weeks seemed like days but I wouldnt have changed it for the world it was the best two weeks of my whole life. So going to the airport again was a long and hard drive while we both try to hold back tears to make the most of the few hours we have left. Then the time comes to yet say goodbye again and you cant seem to say I love you enough.To let go again was so hard and in my opinion him going back from R&R was way harder than when he left the first time.Like everyone always says you never know what you have until its gone is very true. Now dont get me wrong I appreciate my husband and love more than anything but having him leave and realizing everything and then him coming back so you can make up everything to him and having the best time ever makes it unbearable to let go again.
By Amanda
March 24, 2007 8:23 AM | Link to this
R&R was a second honeymoon for us. It was wonderful to have him home again. Saying good-bye is always hard whether it’s the first time or the fifth time.
By Miranda
March 24, 2007 1:19 PM | Link to this
He came home right before thanksgiving and so we had big dinner with all the family there to see him. We spend a couple days in Pigeon Forge area and had so much fun just laughing. It was the best two weeks i was so happy to have him home. I got use to him being there again and now he is gone and we are counting down until he is back in my arms again. The day you get him back in the best day of your life and the day you have to let him go is the hardest I do think this time it was hard on me to let him go. I watch him board the plane and the waterworks started. His R&R was awhile ago but i still have a everyday of it fresh in my memory to hold untill he is home again.
By Vanessa Mae
March 28, 2007 3:14 PM | Link to this
I’d say his leaving after R&R was the hardest of ANY time I’ve told him goodbye. I sat in the car for over an hour before I even cranked it because I was crying so hard. I wanted to pick out his plane in the sky but I dont think i did pick it out actually. I’ve never felt so much like I died but was still living in my whole life. I think I’ve gotten back into that numb day-to-day now but that night was the worst ever; even harder than the other deployments.