Duluth.Talk

By Beautiful

April 10, 2008 8:11 AM | Link to this

so do i, since hs.

By drey

April 10, 2008 8:29 AM | Link to this

Sir, U R lucky to be alive and functioning. Life is short. Many Others are less fortunate than U. We are all trapped in ourselves. The cure for depression is volunteerism. 100% effective. Make your life about someone else. Pray for them. Give them everything you can. Really listen and care about what they are saying and feeling. Be there for them. You’ll be cured instantly, and live happily ever after. Never promote yourself. Never never never ever. It leads to misery and contempt. Like Seinfeld once said, “we all stink”.

NIMH is right, except be the friend, not the victim. Just dont accept victim. The way to cure yourself is to imagine being six feet under, but alive, and thinking, and so you notice squirrels passing over head, and cars driving by, and you think to yourself, “Hey, I got an idea, I think I’ll…..d’oh, I cant, I’m six feet under, darn, and this was a really good idea..” DO that idea now, while you’re not six feet under. Life is very very short, we’re hardly here at all, you know. Death is the great sobering fact, and few of us are lucky enough to confront it for real before we experience it. I got a cancer five years ago and for six months I lived thinking that I had six months to live. I remember looking out from the doctor’s office at strangers exiting a car, and I thought how I’d trade their bodies for mine, without any questions, just for more time. Death comes in on little cat feet. Concede death. Soon enough. As we age we can feel less and less and we grow confused and delerious, which is nature’s kindness. Try looking forward to death as some big clothing-optional party you know you get to attend, but you have to live a little before you arrive. It doesn’t take courage, it takes living, (and tatoos for the party).

God bless you, sir! I know you’ll do great things.

By Down but not out

April 10, 2008 8:54 AM | Link to this

Drey-

I know you mean well, nut you missed the point completely. Depression is a real, physical condition. You don’t “heal yourself” with appropriate activity or thoughts. Everything you suggested is good and should be done, but that doesn’t mean it will heal you.

As a sufferer of depression I tried all of the things you suggested and just felt worse, and flawed, because my feelings did not change. Now, under a physician’s care and medication, I see improvement.

By Anne

April 10, 2008 8:54 AM | Link to this

Thank you for addressing an issue that is still uncomfortable for people to talk about. Fourteen years ago, in the midst of separating from my husband, dealing with a cocaine addiction, I not only suffered from bi-polar, but through a wonderful doctor and therapist, found out that I had suffered from depression for years. It was and had been a crippling time in not only my life, but the people’s lives around me. Once I was diagnosed, in therapy and put on medicine, I couldn’t believe how different my life became! Go back to the article above and read what the NIMH’s directions for helping a friend or even yourself. You will be amazed at just how wonderful life can be when you take control of it. God bless and take care.

By Kim

April 10, 2008 8:55 AM | Link to this

I have had bouts with depression — hormone fluctuations. People need to stop and hear what a person who has depression is saying. Their words are negative. Their actions are negative. Nothing in life seems to matter — NOTHING. A depressed person can PHYSICALLY feel their body/mind/spirit is oppressed. This IS NOT something they are CHOSING to feel or go through. The chemistry that is offset is causing a ribbling effect throughout the body which controls the mind. When you feel good, you can do anything. When you feel lousy, you want to hibernate. Depression is a step lower than hibernation. Your body is screaming to get it OUT of that pain but you aren’t able to know how. Studies tell us laughter helps heal and indeed acts of kindness help elevate the needed imbalance and move the body on to redirect the chemicals necessary and indeed sometimes medication is necessary and wise. Doing for others does help push over the mood as well. But there has to be a trigger to get OUT and do when your body/mind/spirit is screaming I quit. Just remember that.

By sharon

April 10, 2008 9:10 AM | Link to this

My mother lost two sons within six years in two very different and traumatic ways. In all that time we were thinking “she’s so strong, how does she do it”. Well, one day we looked up and she started loosing time and started having confusion. We took her to doctors. Her CT and MRI’s were negative. We were told she has Vascular Dementia (a result of uncontrolled High blood pressure). I truly believe in my heart that she suffered an emotional breakdown.

By Angie

April 10, 2008 9:18 AM | Link to this

I have been to the bottom of the black hole of depression. If I was able to sleep at all, the very first thought that I would have upon awaking was of suicide. I had two major stress issues that caused my brain to stop producing serotonin. I thank God for a good counselor who helped me to work through those issues and for Prozac which brought me up out of that black hole. I’m convinced that my alcoholic father turned to alcohol to deal with depression because there were no antidepressants at that time to help him. I never take it lightly when anyone says that they are depressed. My heart goes out to them. I just want to tell them that they CAN be helped!

By CAR

April 10, 2008 9:18 AM | Link to this

Thanks for sharing. Many of us are in the same boat! Eloquently put.

By Kelly

April 10, 2008 9:34 AM | Link to this

I have suffered depression since my early teen years. Thanks to the depression I now have General Anxiety Disorder with Panic Attacks. The GAD probably was caused by the depression going untreated for 15 years. I have done so many things looking for that happiness thinking something was missing. I have learned I am not missing anything, but maybe family and friends that have passed, that everything I love is in front of me. However, my brain just doesn’t want to work correctly. Maybe that isn’t the correct way to explain but it works for some simple minded people and works for someone without enough coffee in her system this morning. Thanks to medication, things are looking better at times. I have my lows and highs every day. I just try to remember that I have 3 wonderful daughters and a husband that loves me. I have a great job and that I am not perfect. And I don’t have to be perfect.

The depression has caused me to have many physical problems or at least some because I am not the most graceful person in the world.

Drey, I have done the volunteering. I have always lived to make people’s lives better. It brings me happiness but at the same time I am not happy. My husband used to think that way but after making him learn about depression and GAD, he has learned this is not something I can beat with great thoughts and actions. Life is not that easy. I pray I could do that but its not that easy.

Depression is more than a mental illness, it is a disease. It is a physical and mental disease. Everyone gets down a times, life is that way. Many people can do things to make themselves happy. However, people with this disease can do things to make them happy but it doesn’t last but for a few minutes/day/week. This disease will just take over. What makes me happy is watching my 1 year old laugh, my 5 year old show me her genious self, my 14 year old showing me she is finally succeeding in school (ok just examples here) but at the same time all I want to do is run away and cry.

By Bill Allen

April 10, 2008 10:08 AM | Link to this

It’s hard for people who don’t suffer depression to understand. It isn’t that they don’t care - of course they do. They simply don’t have a reference in their own experience from which to draw and relate.

The thing that I would like for people to take from all of this is that depression is not a weakness, it’s an illness. Friends of people suffering from depression my shy away from them because they “don’t want to be around a wet blanket.” It’s an understandable response, there is no malice involved. The “wet blanket,” however, may be completely oblivious to the fact that feeling down all the time is not natural, not normal. Because depression has so invaded their thought process, however, the illness has changed their way of thinking to the extent that it is normal. It’s a kind of brainwashing, I guess.

If depressed people could step outside their thoughts and objectively look inward, maybe they could see it. No one’s created a way to do that, though, and their brain is locked inside their own misery.

The one good thing about overcoming depression is that when you have the tools to dig out of it, when you are finally given the key to unlock the prison in which depression confines you, you find a bright jewel of strength more radiant than most others. As Nietzsche (sic) said, “That which does not kill you only makes you stronger.”

By Bill Allen

April 10, 2008 10:11 AM | Link to this

It’s hard for people who don’t suffer depression to understand. It isn’t that they don’t care - of course they do. They simply don’t have a reference in their own experience from which to draw and relate.

The thing that I would like for people to take from all of this is that depression is not a weakness, it’s an illness. Friends of people suffering from depression my shy away from them because they “don’t want to be around a wet blanket.” It’s an understandable response, there is no malice involved. The “wet blanket,” however, may be completely oblivious to the fact that feeling down all the time is not natural, not normal. Because depression has so invaded their thought process, however, the illness has changed their way of thinking to the extent that it is normal. It’s a kind of brainwashing, I guess.

If depressed people could step outside their thoughts and objectively look inward, maybe they could see it. No one’s created a way to do that, though, and their brain is locked inside their own misery.

The one good thing about overcoming depression is that when you have the tools to dig out of it, when you are finally given the key to unlock the prison in which depression confines you, you find a bright jewel of strength more radiant than most others. As Nietzsche (sic) said, “That which does not kill you only makes you stronger.”

By Sam

April 10, 2008 10:14 AM | Link to this

I’m 36 and have been on an emotional rollercoaster since I was 15. I’m tired.

By cg

April 10, 2008 11:29 AM | Link to this

I remember experiencing depression four years ago after a break up, and after being hospitalized and receiving medication, i was able to bounce back. It’s a feeling i hopefully won’t experience again.

By kristin

April 10, 2008 11:31 AM | Link to this

According to the CDC suicide is the number 11th cause of death in the United States. 31,000 people each year take their own life. That is not including the 425,000 who attempt suicide and are not successful. Yet depression is an illness that is rarely discussed by the general population.

Not to compare illnesses, 40,000 women die each year from breast cancer and the figure is declining because of the public awareness campaigns that take place. In certain demographics, suicide is increasing due to the stereo typing of “weakness”.

I applauded you for being public about this illness. Depression IS NOT A MOOD, or something the sufferer can simply snap out of. I feel more should be done to make people aware of the risk factors for suicide.

By julie

April 10, 2008 12:39 PM | Link to this

drey, you may have had ‘the blues’ but trust me, you have never suffered from real depression.

By chasinwords

April 10, 2008 1:03 PM | Link to this

Sam, hang in there. I have also had depression for years. People have told me to “suck it up” or “cheer up and get over it.” This isn’t a cold you get over or a rock you can climb. This is like sliding faster and faster down a slippery slope, breaking your bones as you fall down so far that there is no longer any light or love or hope. It is hearing your worst fears and complete doom whispered into your ear 24x7. It is watching yourself wither away — physically, mentally, emotionally. You look in the mirror to see some slight resemblence to the person you once were, and you don’t know how to get it back. People would say to me, “But you’re so smart, you’re so pretty, what in the world could be so bad for YOU?” Getting sick is not a choice by circumstance. Getting sick is having an illness. And because depression is usually linked to some other illness (like cancer and strokes and pregnancy), you don’t really know it’s that bad until it’s really that bad. The biggest step is realizing that you need to call someone. Call a hotline. Call someone you love if you are alone. Find a therapist and take medication. You will most likely have to try a few, but therapy AND meds will help so much. One day will be a little brighter than the next. You will always know how very bad it can get, but with the right help, it’s going to be ok.

By mh

April 10, 2008 1:19 PM | Link to this

I think that if you’ve never been in depression, you just don’t know what it’s like. As far as “playing the victim”…in my experience, most depression sufferers (myself included) spend SO long blaming themselves - NOT playing the victim - that they actually NEED treatment to realize that they have an honest-to-God physical and real condition. It’s not the blues. It’s not “being sad”…it’s a physical pain that only being in it can describe. Kudos for telling your story, I know it’s hard and a daily struggle. Keep seeing your docs and take care of yourself.

By rmbr343

April 10, 2008 1:48 PM | Link to this

My mother suffered all her life from so many mental illnesses I can’t remember them all. She had phobias, depression, bi-polar, alcoholism, etc. Unfortunately, she looked at being on medication and receiving counseling as a sign of weakness, and despite the many tears I shed and my pleading with her to seek help, she didn’t until it was too late. She developed metastatic pancreatic cancer and died within three months. It’s almost as though her body chose an illness that would take her quickly because she just didn’t want to live anymore. So now instead of happy memories I have childhood memories of being chased around the house with knives, picking her up off the floor when she was drunk, watching her throw my brother down the stairs, and many, many other terrible things.

So when I started to feel very distinctive “ups and downs” I sought help right away. I know that mental illness can run in families and learned through research that daughters of mothers who suffer from depression have a greater incidence of it themselves. There was no way I was going to put my daughter through everything that my mother had put us kids through. I’ve been on medication now for over ten years and I don’t envision myself ever being without it. Additionally, when problems have arisen in our family my husband, daughter and I have sought counseling and will continue to do so whenever needed.

My daughter is now a teenager and has been diagnosed with depression and anger control (mood disorder) issues. Fortunately, because of our family history I knew what to watch out for. She is currently trying her second medication because, as we all know, not every medication works for everyone. She’s a little bit frustrated because she just wants to “feel better” but she’s hanging in there and is willing, for now, to keep trying.

Thank you so much for putting in print what I have felt for so long. Sufferers of depression MUST talk about it. The only way society is going to accept depression as an “illness” and not something to “snap out of” is when each person finds out just how many people they know that are clinically depressed and on medication. Now I don’t wear a banner that says “I’m depressed and I take Wellbutrin and Zoloft!” but if the subject comes up I talk about it. I can’t tell you how many others have said “Oh! How do you like the Wellbutrin? I tried that but found it didn’t work. Now I’m on Paxil (or some other medication).”

Thank you for this opportunity to express what I’ve felt for such a long time!

By Lucille Willoughby

April 10, 2008 2:35 PM | Link to this

I’ve had problems with depression off and on for years. It runs in the family. But I suffered the longest—over 7 years—thanks to an emotionally abusive marriage. The medication I took alleviated some of the symptoms of depression, but also numbed me. It did give me perspective I needed to realize the major source of my depression was my husband. Only by kicking the anti-depressants was I able to summon the drive/impetus to actually walk out on him and keep him out of my life. Now that I know what depression “feels” like, as well as anxiety, I’ve been able to adjust my behavior since then. However, once you succumb to a major depression, you live in fear of it returning. But I don’t think constantly medicating myself is the answer.

By wits end

April 10, 2008 2:53 PM | Link to this

Bill, Thank you for addressing a very evasive disease. I suffer from depression, and it’s killing me. For about 3 yrs now, my life has become a nightmare. I’m currently on medication which seems to help a little, but most days I wake up puking, and crying. My business is suffering from it, as is my marriage. It seems that whatever can go wrong does. I wish you well in your own battle. I’m beginning to think that my battle may soon be over. I’m so tired……

By Craig Spinks

April 10, 2008 3:00 PM | Link to this

“(W)its end,” get professional help NOW.

By wits end

April 10, 2008 3:24 PM | Link to this

Craig, I’ve tried that, but all I get is a new “medication” that either doesn’t work, or has side effects. The only thing that seems to help is Alcohol, but I can’t drink and maintain a business, so I don’t drink during the day.(yet). My best days are when I wake up, take a sleeping pill or two, and sleep all day. I’m simply at a dead end here..

By LP

April 10, 2008 3:33 PM | Link to this

Wits end, I am here to help. Feel free to email me at to_lauren@yahoo

By Lexie

April 10, 2008 3:51 PM | Link to this

Dear wits end, I know how frustrating it is to be in the place you are in right now. Please don’t give up. It can take a while to find the right medication or combination of meds that work for you. (And after you’ve been on a certain one for a while, it may lose its effectiveness and you have to switch to another kind.) If you feel like your doctor isn’t helping or doesn’t understand what you’re going through, it may be time to find a new one. But it will get better.

By Lyn

April 10, 2008 4:14 PM | Link to this

Thanks for sharing Bill. I knew you had been through so much lately but I had no idea how much you had been suffering. I’m so sorry and I wish somehow I could have been there for you. I think you described all of your experience so well and honestly.

Wits end, you haven’t seen the right doctor, and you really need to find one soon. You may be misdiagnosed. I was treated for years on and off for depression and anxiety disorder starting at age 12. Finally, at age 34 with a husband and two beautiful babies I was diagnosed with Bipolar II. It’s a long road and I know there is much work ahead for me but my life is a little easier to face every day with the right medications AND therapy. Find the right doctor, there is hope for you.

Thanks again Bill. Many hugs your way!

By NK

April 10, 2008 4:29 PM | Link to this

rmbr343, As pertaining to your mother, even though my mother didn’t posess the symptoms yours did, I have had similar problems getting my mother to address her illness. She still won’t but insists that I do. She’s full of excuses.

I’ve suffered for as long as I can remember but wasn’t diagnosed until I was 22 and I am on medication. I still remember my 21st birthday. I lay in bed crying that evening. Getting adequate therapy with my insurance has been my battle. I cannot get an appointment more than once per month and I’ve tried. It wasn’t always like this. I’ve made a decision to change insurance this year. My chronic feelings of anxiety since childhood led to clinical depression. I want to be an outgoing person but I am not. What troubles me is that I’ve had more than one boss to question if I have issues occurring in my life because of my personality (all female - never had issues with a male boss). These were usually after situations in which I’ve stood my ground with others, which I’m not shy about doing. I’d rather clear the air. I spent years being a pushover and I refuse to go back. My current boss has even questioned my attitude. And even though I feel as if it’s none of their business if I’m not harming people, I can’t tell the truth b/c unfortuntely in this society, we are judged unfairly by people who don’t understand the illness. So, I suffer in silence.

I have few interactions with people outside of organizations I am involved in and through church functions. It saddens me because I want for my life to be so much more than this and I feel powerless. When I see people in public with friends socializing, reuniting, and enjoying each other’s company, I am saddened. It’s been 7 or 8 years since I’ve had solid friendships. So, if you are a person who is struggling to get your friends to understand your illness, please take time to thank God TODAY for your well-meaning friends who are lacking in understanding. You’re blessed because some of us have no close friends. Attracting people has never been my strongpoint.

Thank you, Bill, for blogging on this topic. There are so many sufferers of depression who suffer anonymously because it isn’t an “acceptable” illness. No one wants to be judged based on situations over which they have no control. There are a lot of people who needed this.

By elladee

April 10, 2008 4:45 PM | Link to this

Thanks all for the comments, and Bill for being so open about your depression. It really isn’t anything that non-depressed people can relate to. I’ve heard the “suck it up”, pray for God to heal you, “think about other people” arguments. Would anyone say that to an epileptic who needed to be on medication for their illness?

I try to be somewhat open about the struggle with my depression because so, so many people think I’m having a pity party and am being a “victim”. I’m in the process of trying to find a good medication after trying many other roads to health. All the things I’ve done are good (diet, exercise, losing weight, counseling) but let’s hope the medication will finally get me out of this pain.

By Bill Allen

April 10, 2008 4:48 PM | Link to this

Hey Wits End,

Take a deep breath….

First off: Alcohol and sleeping pills are both depressants. They’re probably compounding the problem. They medicate, yes. I call them Luckenback Texas. Down in Luckenback Texas, there ain’t nobody feelin’ no pain.

Problem is, you come back. Oftentimes, you feel worse than you did when you started. It’s a vicious cycle. But I’m preachin’ to the choir, I know.

Go to an AA meeting. I’m not saying you need one, I’m not suggesting anything of the sort. I think you’ll agree with me when I say that you may feel comfortably numb for a while, but in the long run it ain’t helpin’. What I can tell you is that there are people who go to those meetings because they have a commonality in that they can’t live life on their terms anymore, they want to live life on Life’s terms.

It’s an hour of your time. You can drink some coffee, and just listen. You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to. You never have to go back if it doesn’t work for you.

What I think you’ll find are a variety of people - men, women, rich, poor - who see their world spinning, and they want to stop and get off. What they are learning is that one person can’t do it alone, but a lot of people together can.

Don’t be alone, Wits End. As much as you feel like you want to be, don’t do it. People want to help. Let them. It’s not easy, what I’m telling you. I know that. I feel your pain, and I’m not being glib when I say that. It takes a lot of strength to keep the door open, dude. Someone will help you keep the door open. Hang in there.

By mcm

April 10, 2008 4:49 PM | Link to this

Drey - I know you mean well too, but telling someone that volunteering is an effective cure for depression is like telling someone that tutoring children will cure their cancer.

It’s a nice thought, but real depression is an actual medical illness and cannot be cured or treated simply by doing nice things.

Wit’s end, I hope you will try some different things - a different doctor, different medication, different therapies. Something that works great for one person may be totally useless to another. Unfortunately, it takes time to find the right treatment and for some people it takes a LOT of time. But as a former sufferer, I can tell you that it IS worth it to try. I have been where you are, oh have I been there. Please keep trying.

By CDM

April 10, 2008 5:23 PM | Link to this

NK, I can totally relate to your situation concerning the boss “inquiry” and the lack of close friends, aside from and ONLY my husband and God.

I suffer not only from dibilating depression, but was also diagnosed as being MPD (multiple personality disorder) This diagnoses was due to being raped at the age of 3 by a stranger in the neighborhood. Then the wise mindset at the time advised my parents to “don’t let her talk about it”.

Combining this with incest later in my preteen years (my mother was an active particapant as well) and yalla…MPD combined with depression and strong introversion tendancies.

10 years ago I left my (now ex) husband and moved here to the ATL area. I meet a great man (8yrs. ago) who I was totally honest with. All the shame, disgrace, self loathing, guilt and self hatred I (over time) shared with him, and the causes as well.

I’ll be the last one to say “I’m normal” but a part of me holds on to the thought that no one is truely “normal” We all have our own quirks that individually take us off some chart….some where in the world.

Needless to say, sexually, I’m totally disfuctional, but my husband allows me to ALWAYS go at my own speed and back out without reproach if I need to. (pretty wonderful man huh?)

To quicken this up, my (now) husband encouraged me to go see a doctor and let her (I don’t trust male doctor’s for some reason)know as much as I was confortable sharing. My MPD has (been for the most part)”incorporated”.

But the depression and anxiety will (I’m afraid) be life long. I’m on Cymbalta and Xanax for the last 6 yrs. Like everyone says’ “good days and some not so good”. But I have a husband who loves me (all and each and every one of me) and who supports me and is very understanding.

I just lost my job 3 weeks ago (they fired me because I forgot a procedure 3 times and damaged some product) after working at the company for 8yrs. (A door doesn’t shut that a window isn’t left opened….I don’t know who wrote that…not me though)

The first time it happened was about 6mos. ago. At the time my boss asked if I was “struggling” with any personal issues.

What was I supposed to say? The truth? Come on, as it has been stated over and over in here, unless you’ve been there, you can’t possibly understand it. So how many people in your life have been certified and treated with MPD?

It doesn’t matter…..what matters is I move on. Even with my bad days of not getting out of bed, letting the laundry pile up (at least dinners ready for hubby when he gets home) and generally feeling like a “pile”. I know tht maybe tomorrow I will feel better. I felt better today then I did yesterday, so the hope is still there. I can remember when my depression went on for months and months….years turning into years without me knowing why. Now I know..and knowledge is power. I may not have the best ever day..today or even tomorrow. But if I can just say to myself I feel a “tad bit” better, then I know there is still hope I’ll break out of this funk.

Sorry folks, didn’t mean to go on and on with this. Just know other than yourself, people have been there and felt that. The will (at least mine) to survive is strong if you can just hope.

Hope for a better tomorrow.

Good day and best to all CDM

By Noah

April 10, 2008 6:26 PM | Link to this

I had to deal with my depression by writing a book titled “Dirty Justice” My story gives detail information and names of those involved in the illegal adoption of my children and the DeKalb Police Department inability to solve my wife’s death. I was falsely incarcerated for fourteen months before the District Attorney Office discovered they made a mistake.

By lisa

April 10, 2008 6:27 PM | Link to this

Hi Everyone:

Big Hugs to All! I tell people all the time - depression is no joke.

When the opportunity presents itself, I tell people I suffer from depression; hopefully someone can seek help based on my story as I once did.

I take Wellbutrin and Effexor. At one time I felt bad for taking all this medicine, then I figured what is worse: me taking this medicine or my kids seeing me in the corner sobbing uncontrollably?

@ Wits End: double hug for you. You may want to find another Doctor, one that listens. Trust in yourself, trust in your God. You are not alone. Take Care

By Noah

April 10, 2008 6:28 PM | Link to this

I had to deal with my depression by writing a book titled “Dirty Justice” My story gives detail information and names of those involved in the illegal adoption of my children and the DeKalb Police Department inability to solve my wife’s death. I was falsely incarcerated for fourteen months before the District Attorney Office discovered they made a mistake.

By Noah

April 10, 2008 6:28 PM | Link to this

I had to deal with my depression by writing a book titled “Dirty Justice” My story gives detail information and names of those involved in the illegal adoption of my children and the DeKalb Police Department inability to solve my wife’s death. I was falsely incarcerated for fourteen months before the District Attorney Office discovered they made a mistake.

By kia

April 10, 2008 6:29 PM | Link to this

I have seasonal depression. People understand this even less. There is no triggering situation other than the days get short in the fall. So I use a light box in the morning for 6-9 months and I promise myself if I can’t be productive today, I’ll try again tomorrow. I was suicidal one winter and realized most don’t understand that either. I was not trying to hurt my family or teach them a lesson. I couldn’t think about them hardly at all. I hurt too bad. It is selfish, and self-centered but I wasn’t lashing out at anyone. I just wanted to stop the pain.

By gabomi

April 10, 2008 10:55 PM | Link to this

I was diagnosed as clinically depressed many years ago in my 20s. I experienced the typical symptoms, manic highs and lows, loss of appetite, thoughts of suicide, etc. It was a very dark time in my life. I went to a psychiatrist who was great, but wanted to put me on medication. I knew that was not the path I personally wanted to take. I thanked her for all of her great help and I went home and prayed the most desperate prayer of my life - and it worked! It literally felt like a heavy weight had been lifted off of me!! Since that day, I have NEVER experienced depression again. I know there will be those who have something negative to say, but all I can say is that prayer TRULY worked for me. Despression is an ugly spirit that we have the God given power to do away with! Thanks for allowing me to share!

By Other CJ

April 10, 2008 10:57 PM | Link to this

I was 10 when first hit by a horrible depression that deepened by the day. My parents did not understand, nor did I, what was going on. I retreated from going outside, started having problems sleeping, had jittery muscles, lack of appetite, you name it. I also developed intense fears about different things, and lack of coordination. As time went on, and I went back to school, I began to retreat from friends that I was formally close to. I noticed a new strange symptom as well: dissassociation, which made me feel like I was an alien, it was really creepy. I skipped going to camp in the summer time, and slept all of the time. My body felt like it belonged to an old person. I also began to notice that I would have sever “up” times, when I could not stop laughing. This would be after an unusual low time. I got a little better gradually, struggled through my adolescence, still not fully realizing what the heck happened to me until one day when I was around 15, I heard the term used, “depression”. I read up on it from that point on, and finally at 17, was able to convince my parents to take me to a counselor. By that time, I had missed so much of my childhood that it seemed pointless. I never stuck with a counselor, or found a medicine that really worked to relieve the symptoms completely until around 1993, when I took prozac. I have had daily suicidal thoughts in one form or another for the last 30 years. Adulthood has been a terrible struggle for me. God pulled me through much of the time with little miracles to show He was there, etc. I finally gained significant ground in the last five years, and can truly say that I can go for weeks without a suicidal thought now, which I never thought I would be able to do.

By Other CJ

April 10, 2008 11:05 PM | Link to this

I think what made my depression so bad, was the fact that it happened so early in life when I needed to develop socially, and I felt like I was in a war zone instead, having to defend myself from an unseen enemy that could creep up on me at any time with dissassociation, phobias, bizarre speech, etc. Only recently have a felt true joy in being alive and well.

By Other CJ

April 10, 2008 11:10 PM | Link to this

My depression became complicated with anger at my family, and sadness over a lost childhood. I’m at a better place now, since 1) the medicines have helped, 2) I finished college and finally found a rewarding career, and 3)I realize that unrealistic expectations of my childhood contributed to the sadness and grief.

By ga girl

April 10, 2008 11:44 PM | Link to this

I am 61 years old and I have had depression for about 25 years. I, at first did not know what in the world was wrong with me, but one day I woke up and could not function. I never felt such sadness, drained, so many emotions that I can not name them all. All I know is I called into work for 2/3 days straight explaining the best I could, I can not function! I went to Dr. that week and waS diagnosed with depression. I was put on Prozac and that was a life saver, for me. Later on, Prozac quit working for me and I went down again and now for the past 20 years or more. Ive being on several antidepressants and am now on wellbutrin. I have also learned the signs/warning signs of depression, and can pretty well handle it. The hard part is watching my 40 year old son suffer with bi-polar disorder. On top of that, he is an alcoholic. Alcohol is used to medicate and we all know that does not work except for the moment! Ive witnessed DT’s.hallucinations,crazy mood swings,total lost several cars, in I C U from drunk motorcycle crashes, 2 marriages fall apart, loose child visitation rights, loose driving priviledges because of habitual violator(dui)several trips to jail, you name it, Ive lived it! But, through all this, I have hope! I have a God that has seen me through all these situations and given me strength to get through each day. Man its hard some times, but what choice do we have? I compare my self to Job, in the Bible.The light at the end of the tunnel is named JESUS.God bless all of you who have wrote in, and know you are loved, and God see’s and knows our pain and our struggles. He is our rock!

By get real

April 11, 2008 11:41 AM | Link to this

This makes me laugh.

Depression? I been doagnosed too. Involuntarily, I might add, I went in for a problem with my eyes.

Doctors are all too ready nowdays to prescribe you meds. This is malpractice. Doctors still do not understand why 90% of the drugs on the market effect the brain the way they do. The only thing they know less about is how it will effect you. This being said, the fact is doctors and medicine in general is a guessing game. It rarely ever works. If you have a bone sticking out through your skin, CALL A FRIGGIN DOCTOR, AND SOON. If you’re a little sad or felling down…go pet a puppy, watch some fish…go see a good movie…go get laid. Go do something. Doctors in this country like to lie and say there’s no way to fix your depression. Doctors in the rest of the world usually won’t prescribe drugs because you are “feeling down” or “Depressed.”

Eropean patient: Yes, doctor, I think I am depressed.

Eropean doctor: Cheer up.

see how this works? Seriously, every doctor IN THE WORLD outside america thinks this is a joke. Then again, most of the great colleges in the world are outside the US. Most of the rest of the globe laughs at the premise of the ivy leage. Princton, Harvard and Yale are all laughingstocks when you leave our soil. And rightfully so, they are pathetic schools of thought. In Europe they have to qualify this stuff. Here, it’s ivy leage and 300 grand because they SAY it is.

Everyone gets bad days. I feel sorry for none of you. Even you, bill, and I’ve met your shaky, silly self before. It’s not the stroke that has you depressed, it’s your self-image and constant drinking. When you feel like sht in the morning hung over, you WILL NOT be the nicest or most stable dude. Stop doing it so much. Hell, I have hayfever and I’m cranky. But like my dad always told me when I was little and would cry- “SHADDAP, you have no reason to cry. If you want a reason I’ll give you one.”

you need a reason or just go the hell outside and have some fun.

By Pam Mayfield

April 11, 2008 1:51 PM | Link to this

Bill, I read your article, When Depression strikes, seek help. I am so thankful you wrote this article. I hope your openness will bring awareness to help educate those who think depression is something you can just snap out of. The way you described how your brain was discombobulated, the reason why, and how you expressed the emotional feeling it is like someone put a plug in the bottle of your soul is so true.

I agree with your statement to shed the folks who tell you to suck it up. In my humble opinion, the person who gives this kind of advice is the one with the discombobulated brain. Until one experiences their brain transmitters going hay wire has never ridden on the emotional roller coaster of depression.

I am a passenger who has ridden this roller coaster. Every time I passed by the ticket master I was screaming as loud as I could, please get the electrician to fix the crazy hay hire system to make this roller coaster STOP, I WANT OFF!

My brain will always be discombobulated. I have accepted this fact and no longer listen to the command, ALL ABOARD. l HIRED A GREAT ELECTRICIAN AND FIRED THE TICKET MASTER.

If you feel you have DISCOMBOBULATED brain do not be ashamed or afraid to seek professional help. It takes a STRONG AND HEALTHY BRAIN to realize it needs help.

For those who do not understand the depth of depression, I beg you to stop being the ticked master and telling the passenger “TO JUST SUCK IT UP”

By rmbr343

April 11, 2008 4:34 PM | Link to this

NK, you’re not alone. I too feel developing friendships is very difficult. My mother controlled every aspect of my life growing up and didn’t like me having friends because I’d come home with “crazy ideas” about how a family is supposed to function “normally”. My brother has a lot of friends as an adult because he was able to just “walk out” and go be with his friends when things got rough. After all, he had his big sister there to deal with the craziness of our mother. Now as a result, I find it very hard to get close to people and maintain that closeness. Its kind of ironic because I am a VERY friendly person and I love being with people. But I only let them into my life so far and then I back off. I really want to change this, but it’s so hard at 44 y/o to “make close friends”. Everyone already has established friendships and I always feel like I’m intruding if I ask about what they’re all doing on a particular day when I hear they’re getting together. Then my feelings get terribly hurt when I find out that gatherings and parties and other fun stuff has happened without having been invited. Its such a Catch-22. So I focus on my family and my volunteer work.

One thing to remember NK…if your depression is effecting your relationships at work, be honest about what’s going on in your life. I’ve opened up to several people here at the office (my boss included)and it was received very well. It sometimes helps for people to know what they’re dealing with. When you say you refuse to be a “push over” that’s great but don’t push back too hard just because you’re afraid of seeming weak. Sometimes backing down and keeping the peace works out ok.

Now, get real… “Cheer up!” Yep, that’s a real great thing to say to someone who’s clinically depressed! You might as well point that person to the nearest cliff because you could just be sending them over the edge of despair with a comment like that. Anyone who is suffering from actual depression or any other “mental” illness can’t just “cheer up” or “snap out of it” anymore than a Type I diabetic can go without their insulin! Geesshhh…

Many people have a chemical imbalance causing their illness. Those people who can feel better without meds, that’s WONDERFUL! I’m so happy for you! But for some of us, it just doesn’t work that way.

By Bill Allen

April 13, 2008 12:34 PM | Link to this

get real,

Wow. Your dad must be proud. He raised one hateful sunovabitch. I hear Jerry Springer’s gonna retire soon. Submit a resume. Unfortunately, you won’t be able to do the job anonymously. Maybe you should stick to blog sniping.

I don’t know where to begin. So I won’t. Except to say that you are the weakest link. Good-bye.

By Dacula Bob

April 13, 2008 1:26 PM | Link to this

Bill(y);

June and I you knew as Billy when we lived in Lockridge Forest and Parsons Ridge. We still call your classmate and bandmate Bobby. I thought your article was right on. My mother is 91 and still living independently but has always been an introvert and seemed tp pity everyone else. I am going to mail her your article for awareness if nothing else. June and I live in Dacula Bluff and one our neighbors, Chreistine Ogle (she worked at the school with your mom) has kept us advised of you guys the last several years. We’re glad you have found a forum for your talents.

Best regards to you (and Mom and Dad),

Bob and June

By Not Sure

April 14, 2008 7:44 AM | Link to this

All,

Please understand I am not trying to belittle your situations. I am not. I think that I might need to talk to someone. I am not suicidal or anything, but I feel generally “down” most of the time. My life has not been easy lately. My question is this: Who should I see to talk about this? Psychiatrist? Psychologist? Counselor? I don’t want to get medicated unless it is necessary, and I feel that sometimes doctors are too “quick” to write prescriptions. Any suggestions on where to start?

By Bill Allen

April 14, 2008 8:14 AM | Link to this

Not Sure,

It’s good that you feel you want to talk to someone. There’s nothing wrong with that. Personally, I think the world would be a better place if we talked to each other instead of at each other.

If you have a HR department where you work, ask them for some suggestions. By law, they will keep your queries in the strictest confidence, and they will refer you accordingly.

If you attend church, talk to your clergy. They will lend a good ear, and they are a good resource for finding non-spiritual assistance.

Your doctor is an excellent resource. Contrary to what some may tell you, pills don’t necessarily fix everything, and no good doctor will ever prescribe something you don’t need. Your doctor will also keep any conversations in the strictest confidence.

Finally, here’s a website: http://www.depression-guide.com/

I googled “help for depression,” and this was one of many websites offered. Education is the best tool available to you. By learning more about what’s going on inside you, you can better make practical, informed choices for yourself.

Good luck to you. Let me know how things go with you.

By Bill Allen

April 14, 2008 9:14 AM | Link to this

Not Sure,

One more thing: Friends and family are, of course, a great place to start. Without knowing more about you,though, I’m reluctant to send you into the arms of one of the sources of your consternation. You know that better than I do.

I can talk to my parents. I wouldn’t be here today without their love and support. If you can, then that’s the best place to start. If you don’t have a good relationship with your family, then you have other options that I’ve suggested.

By Get Real

April 14, 2008 11:31 AM | Link to this

OKAY Bill, nice insult. Fact is my dad is like a god compared to you. Don’t even get me started. With all your drinking it’s no wonder you’re depressed. Just how many DUI’s do you have under your belt? I can sure as hell verify two. (Yes, don’t even deny it you shaky sumbish) you have a number of them.

Like i said before, if you DO YOUR RESEARCH (that is, fact- not your opinions…facts supported by study and figures-) you will find that the rest of the world, including Japan, Sweden, Germany and Austria have no legal description of depression. YOU CAN find doctors willing to give meds in a select few portions of those countries, but you can find quacks anywhere.

TO REITTERATE yes, I was diagnosed with ‘depression’ by a doctor. He was an undereducated, impotent quack. Anyone who diagnosed any of you with similar is one, too.

I got news: people have down days. Everyone. Not just you. The only difference here is you drunks and whiners are too mentally weak to deal with life. YES, YOU SHOULD be marched up to a cliff and thrown off. If you cannot take control of your lives, suicide is your best alternative.

I’ve had a pretty rough life. You don;t see me on prozac because I can’t/won’t let go of the past and get on with my affairs. The rest of the ENTIRE WORLD is in fact, correct. And you, Bill Allen, need to stay OFF the booze, OUT OF YOUR CAR after you drink and STOP blaming your shortcomings on the world around you. My first impression of you was a nice, albeit strange man who was having withdrawls from alchohol as we spoke. My impression of you now is that of a crying drunkard.

when you abuse alchohol as much as Bill, get DUI’s and have a stroke because of your excessive use of it,CORRECT YES, you’re going to HAVE A REALLY BAD TIME. When people stay drunk a long time they have a tendancy to get emotional (I really love you guys) or angry (Whatshu shay to me?) and things like depression seem real. Did you ever stop to think maybe it’s all that alchohol? or maybe it’s just you throwing yourself a pity-party everyday. OOOO BOO-HOO Bill Allen thinks he;s depressed.

I had a friend in high school who was a thylidamide baby. He had ONE big arm, a tiny vestage of another growing off his back and two FEET without legs attached directly to his pelvis. He was so tiny that we could carry him around under an arm. HIs parents were too poor to buy him a g******* WHEELCHAIR until he was in high school, where the teachers chipped in and bought him an electric one.

Every day that boy ran track- hopping off his big arm and onto his feet wearing a leather glove. The coach used to make everyone keep running till he got his laps in. It used to kill us watching him, but Ashish smiled and did it and took pride in the fact.

you people…have NOTHING to cry about. You have two good arms, two good feet and your health. If you are breathing, eating and going to the bathroom regularly, you are fine. People who whine about their situation with a fully able body and a family are a*****. People like Bill Allen- who was once in fine shape and drank himself into DUI and stroke over a period of years- have no friggin place crying about it on the ajc.

Next time you want to cry depression and ‘cry uncontrollably’ in the shower, remember for YOUR SAKE that there are people out there with REAL PROBLEMS, not the imagined excuses you people dredge up from the creek bottoms. You have nothing to be depressed about.

By vetekbob

April 14, 2008 12:25 PM | Link to this

Get Real, In my opinion, it is not only unnecessary, but wrong of you to talk about Bill,in the way you have. You are welcomed to your opinions. However, you are not a medical doctor.

I wish you the very best. I am glad to hear that you have found help, and you are working on a new chapter in your life.

Bobby

By Jester

April 14, 2008 1:37 PM | Link to this

Hey getreal….How do you know that your doctor was impotent? Is that the reason for your being such an a*******hole? He wasn’t able to “help” you in the way that you so desired?

By Fedup

April 14, 2008 4:13 PM | Link to this

Hey Get real, or is it Steve….? Go play in traffic, would ya?

By Inquisitive One

April 14, 2008 5:56 PM | Link to this

Get Real, this is not the forum for bashing someone. If you have opinions about the topic, you are welcome to express them. This is the United States the last time I checked and whether other countries recognize Depression as an illness or not has no bearing here. You’re welcome to move to another country at any time so that you won’t be bothered by something like Depression or those that have it.

Bill, I applaud you for discussing something very personal and real on this blog. It took a lot of courage. I’m so glad that you’re getting help. Please, please don’t listen to the rantings of “Get Real”. They don’t know you like I do. You’ve helped a great deal of people by posting this topic.

I had a high school friend that died in October from depression/drinking herself to death. It was devastating to her friends and family. She had gotten to the point where she wouldn’t let anyone in to help her - literally and figuratively. Her family found her dead on the floor of her boarded up house. It was horrible. If you suffer from depression or think that you might be, please seek help. It’s not your fault that you feel so bad, and medication isn’t always the answer, but a professional needs to determine that. It’s okay to ask for help. I’m glad that Bill did.

By Kobe

April 14, 2008 6:04 PM | Link to this

Get Real…get a life. It is obvious that you have anger issues. You need to take a look at your life and stop venting on other people. Stick to the issue of the blog and don’t make it personal.

By Jason

April 14, 2008 6:21 PM | Link to this

Get Real gives me the very strong impression that he has studied little about this and has a whole slew of hatred to spread in his diatribes. Depression, Anxiety, Bi-Polar Syndrome, are all as real as Schizophrenia. I myself follow the rule that there is more than just one means to treat depression. I myself have suffered bouts that did not require medication, but left me listless, exhausted and unhappy to leave my home. I do however suffer from anxiety, I tried harder than you’ll ever know to conquer my anxiety without medication, I was anxious on days where there was nothing to be anxious about and that anxiety embodied itself in severe gastrointestinal problems, sleep disruption, constant back and neck pain, etc.

As for Europeans laughing at us, your name says it all. Some of the greatest biopsychologists come from the schools you refer to, Psychology is a very young discipline and folks are learning all the time across the world about how to address mental health. Neurotransmitters like serotonin, norepinephrine, acetylcholine, dopamine all play major roles in mental health and those neurotransmitters can misfire resulting in mental illness. I agree a pill is not a cure all, however I am not ashamed to address my chemical imbalance with a chemical. You don’t fight the flu by “getting a grip.” You don’t have to agree either, but the spiteful and bitter language you have used indicates that you just might have some mental imbalance of your own, that or you need behavior modification.

By Get Real

April 15, 2008 11:23 AM | Link to this

The only thing I see here is a bunch of drunks and whiners. You have nothing wrong with you but self-pity.

The rest of the globe is right. You people and your ‘brilliant psycologists’ are wrong. Get with the times and get with the program. You ‘depressed’ people need to go outside and get some friggin sun, earn some money. It will change for you very fast. Nothing chases away the blues like a fat wallet. Have you seen how much fun stuff you can do with 500 bucks in your pocket?

get a life, losers. Stop being losers and you won’t feel down all the time.

as for Bill, this is like the fitieth stupid article I’ve read of his. We need a more interesting (and frankly less inept) writer for Duluth. You know, one that hasn’t been an alchoholic for some odd decades.

By Mac

April 15, 2008 12:00 PM | Link to this

Are AAA & Get Real brothers???? (AAA was bashing duluth pd)

By Jason

April 15, 2008 6:25 PM | Link to this

Okay, so first I was pleasant to you Get Real, in large part because although I found you an ignorant, arrogant blowhard with a strong tendency toward the better than thou syndrome, but was polite enough to keep that to myself. Now I’ll type what I think. I am a social worker, I bust my behind working hard, and earn my paycheck. I don’t need you to tell me to get a job, I work hard for my community every day, harder than you do sitting with your overinflated ego typing to a group of people discussing a disease, which it is whether you think so or not, and last time I checked Bill and every poster on this page no one was asking if mental illness was real or not you narcissistic fool. You obviously lack the ability to read and comprehend because what I made abundantly clear is there are psychologists AROUND THE WORLD who agree with biopsychological theorem and are exploring the neurological basis behind depression. I put the emphasized parts in capital letters so you’d get it. You read only what you want to read. And no where in my post did I whine, frankly I was rather factual. I’m not a whiner, I pulled myself together, took some meds and got life back together, graduated magna cum laude from college, have a successful professional career, and a great family life. I don’t need your advice, “get some money” boy that one is sagacious (look that word up if you need to). If all our problems could be solved in a mall spending cash then the United States would be problem free. Don’t think I haven’t noted how cowardly you are to stand behind some witty screen name while you bash people personally - you must feel so high and mighty. I hope some manic depressive comes along and flips his lid on you. If you don’t like Bill’s posts, quit reading them. Finally, I bet you haven’t done anything unselfish or altruistic in your life - as noted by your cruel comments toward alcoholism, mental illness, etc. Give it a shot, altruism is in, bullying is out “get with the times and get with the program.” I work with drug addicts, homebound elderly and terminally ill people all day - I have acquired more knowledge in one day that you’ll ever know. Kudos to you Bill on having the courage to talk about something personal and real, while having the strength to attach your name to it. How easy it is to bash when one is anonymous.

By Sayme

April 16, 2008 7:53 AM | Link to this

I know what you have gone through. I have be battling with depression for 12 years now. I was diagnosed as having psychosis and have taken every medication under the sun. I have counted the empty bottles.. 27 of them even though I have thrown out some empty bottles because of space. I am now currently on geodon which had helped but still having the blues and sometimes suicidal. The doctor gave me symbyax as a 7 day trial it had helped but I can’t afford it. It’s $340.00 for 30 tablets. I have fibromyalgia, on top of that and other health problems. I just pray for strengt each day.

By Get Real

April 16, 2008 11:05 AM | Link to this

Jason- you want to show me some of those studies? No? because you won’t find them? Lol. I’d like to see a link to ONE (1) such study. Scocial worker haha. That’s why you’re depressed honey. You make no money and you spend your days around the dregs of this city. Damn, I’d be depressed too. See how this works?

You fackers have no right at all complaining or wallowing in self-pity. You are the only ones who pity YOU. I was taught to pick it up by the bootstraps and that I do, despite ‘moods’ and frankly obnoxious symptoms like sleeplessness. But I am telling you like ANY doctor outside this country will tell you: GET A FUHKEN GRIP on your life.

Bill sufferes from depression because he drinks too damn much. Half of you people are probably the same, the rest need to drink a little MORE apparently or get a hobby. WHY don’t I see more of this in the rest of the world when I go on leave? Probably because in other countries they don’t coddle you and lie about how you can’t change yourself without drugs or shock treatment or some drivel like that.

It’s bullsht. You all CAN AND DO have the power to help yourselves through discipline, you just refuse to. You’re obviously weak willed or just plain stupid. Maybe you haven’t even tried. Sounds alot to me like you haven’t.

to jason- Try cutting off your legs and see just how depressed you are then, sport. You could have it alot worse than you do. YOU have no excuse other than self-pity. Put down the kleenex box, dry your eyes and get over yourself, loser. There’s lots of people all around you who are far more ‘depressed’ than you and they have a real right to be. You? You obviously have a computer, you’re doing all right.

By Mac

April 16, 2008 11:54 AM | Link to this

GET REAL….

By Tim

April 16, 2008 12:16 PM | Link to this

Do any of you realize how demoralizing it is to tell a group of people who are desperately searching for a cure, or at least relief from a debilitating disease that there is no hope? Anyone with any normal intelligence knows that people who say “Just cheer up!”, or “Just get out more.” aren’t giving viable solutions. BUT, to spread the word that no medicine on planet earth helps at all could be further depressing people who medicine could work for. I feel for all of you, but don’t exacerbate the problem by taking any hope away. Medication and lifestyle changes CAN work for a large group of people. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work for everyone, and for those people I am very sorry.

By Mac

April 16, 2008 12:38 PM | Link to this

Amen Tim. I try to open my mind to all kinds of issues & learn about things I do not know about. I don’t suffer from depression, but know people who do & I am always here to help anybody in anyway if they want my help. For people to udder there thoughtless, careless & rude remarks to make themselves feel better is just awful & they absolutely have more issues themselves to deal with & just won’t or don’t know how. You have to ask the question on why is Get Real so angry and or ignorant to the situation of depression????

By Tim

April 16, 2008 2:00 PM | Link to this

Mac,

I’m really wondering how you can say you aren’t suffering from depression when tax day was yesterday!! LOL

By Mac

April 16, 2008 3:41 PM | Link to this

Tim, LOL LOL =)

It helps when you get $$ back!!!!!

By Jason

April 16, 2008 8:13 PM | Link to this

Get Real, I beat my depression problem, with meds and the very discipline you mentioned - I don’t pity anyone but you, your nastiness and your ugly nature. I wouldn’t waste my time linking anything to you because you’re bitter and you just get angrier and angrier the more you type. As I’ve said you are ignorant and not worth the time it would be to educate you. You sit at home and simmer in your own hideous behavior.

As for my job, I am a Geriatric Social Worker, someday you’re going to grow old and sick and you’re going to need help - I handle long term care in-home. My job is a noble profession that helps people, I make a comfortable living that is none of your business, and I’m proud of it - I don’t need someone like you to validate my work. You obviously need the validation since you vent endlessly toward me who disagrees strongly with you, god forbid someone disagree with you’re almighty word. And for the record… I’m not a drinker. I don’t need my legs cut off, I don’t need you to instruct me how to live my life, I’ve pulled it pretty much together and if you ever called me honey to my face I’d rearrange your cranium - you lack basic respect for your fellow man and I pity that in you. If you lack legs I offer you no sympathy as I have a very sick relative who cannot even speak, ever since he was a baby in constant pain with grand-maal seizures, now 21 - and yet he’s not a bullheaded egomaniac who enjoys insulting and degrading. You’ll sit at home saying you don’t need my pity but you’re getting it because I think you’re a pathetic case. People here don’t care for your bull, I don’t even know Bill and feel a strong desire to defend him from a digusting bully like you. You are the most mentally ill person on this board. Go get yourself some anger management and call it a day you waste of oxygen.

To the rest of you on this board, I wish you all the best of luck working toward the solution to beating depression. This is something that is personal and there’s not a d* person on this earth that has a right to criticize or put you down. You all keep working toward finding strength to pick yourselves up, talk to your friends, write down the blessings in your life to reflect on, sit in the sun, take a shower, force yourself to do something you enjoyed, talk to your doctor, get out of bed, change jobs, do you what you need to do. There’s a billion and one ways to face mental illness but it’s something you do 100% or not at all, and it is something you do for yourself and the people you love. On the bright side I’d say that “Get Real” has given us a real poster-child for how NOT to become, that should be incentive enough for many of you. Thanks again Bill for bringing this relavant issue to life.

By Kobe

April 16, 2008 8:55 PM | Link to this

Jason I think the work you are doing is honorable and I thank you for that. “Get Real” let me tell you something. I have known Bill since the fourth grade and I can tell you he is more of a man you could ever strive to be. I suggest you pick up the book called “How to win friends and influence people”. Or perhaps you should check out some anger management classes given at the local community colleges. You are in need of help. You show some much anger and hatefulness in your postings that no one takes you seriously. If you want to make your case I suggest you keep to the facts and take your bashing out of it. I’ll be glad to mail you some self improvement literature at my cost because you really need somthing to improve your social skills, which you have none of. Get real “get real”

By Get Real

April 17, 2008 2:22 PM | Link to this

Yet another losing set of comments in a losing blog. Bottom percentile people, bottom percentile.

By Inquisitive One

April 17, 2008 6:10 PM | Link to this

Get Real, find another blog. Your comments and foul language are not needed here, so get a life. Bill said it best when he said “you are the weakest link. Good-bye.”

By lolo

April 17, 2008 6:19 PM | Link to this

Bill - we both know what untreated depression can cause. It’s been almost 8 years but the pain of those left behind has only somewhat subsided. I wish you the best, as always, and I know that you are smart enough to do what you should be doing. Lots and lots of people love you very much - including me. Hang in there with your “bad self”.

By Get Real

April 18, 2008 11:14 AM | Link to this

Let’s hope he doesn’t have another STROKE from his alchoholism.

weakest link? I’m not the one crying about how I’m paralyzed with depression. want to see what’s behind door number three?

you are all dismissed.

By jester

April 18, 2008 3:06 PM | Link to this

“Seriously, every doctor IN THE WORLD outside america thinks this is a joke”

Remember when you said this, getreal? I found this study online. Please read it. Then, please shut up.

http://www.who.int/director-general/speeches/2001/english/20011025_copingwithstressbrussels.en.html

Friggin’ moron.

By Willie Allin

April 18, 2008 3:40 PM | Link to this

Drunkards are the biggest rationalizers that exist. They always blame their depression, their daddy, their job, their this and their that — for everything in their pathetic lives that doesn’t run to perfection. That excuses, explains and alibis their reliance and addiction to alcohol. the magic beverage that deadens their senses to their pathetic loser-life. All you “depressed” alkys just need to kill yourself and get out of the way. Whining milksops!

By Charles Summerour

April 18, 2008 6:43 PM | Link to this

Thanks for your comments on depression. You expressed many things that I have known and experienced for many years. It is very nearly impossible as others have said, to explain how being down feels and even more difficult to convince others that it can in fact be chemically related. While I profess to many years of medical treatment, there have been various episodes which at times have called for changes to keep me level. One aspect which has always troubled me is that the one closest to you, typically a spouse, can get the brunt of the difficulty of dealing with something which they may or may not be able to deal with on a common sense basis. I noted that your situation is likely related to health issues which was the trigger for my last episode, after which, I got on the proper medication which required patience and didn’t come easily. Those who are affected must find the right treatment for them, whether it be medication or some other therapy. Being ashamed is not an option.

By Bill Allen

April 19, 2008 12:13 PM | Link to this

Charles,

You make some great points. In my case, the depression was a direct result of my stroke. I liken it to an operating computer getting struck by lightning. The “surge of electricity” resulting from the clot in my head disrupted the operational processes in my brain, my “computer.” Unfortunately, the brain can’t reboot, and the doctor can’t simply replace the hard drive or the printer. A combination of medication and lifestyle change helps, but the brain keeps on working, and some subroutines fail over time while others correct themselves. It’s a constant guessing game, and while doctors know more about how and why depression occurs, “feel better” simply doesn’t work. It sure would be easier to replace the defective and damaged parts.

More importantly, you said, “the one closest to you, typically a spouse, can get the brunt of the difficulty of dealing with something which they may or may not be able to deal with on a common sense basis.” When the brain functions abnormally, common sense becomes a nonsensical subroutine in the “computer,” the brain. The one who suffers depression becomes irrational and unaware of their irrationality, and the ones who are closest to them unfortunately bear the brunt of it. Howard Hughes, for example, thought he was perfectly normal in his mind. Why should he fix something that he didn’t think was broken to begin with? He had money, power. Why was he he always surrounded by morons? It was the people involved in Howard Hughes’ life that bore the brunt of his affliction, not Howard himself.

Thank goodness for the people who care about us. They bridge the gap between our world and the “real” world.

By Get Real

April 21, 2008 11:08 AM | Link to this

You said it best yourself, Bill-

There’s a gap between ‘Your’ depressed little world and our real one. That gap is called self pity, soon as you people get something good going for yourselves this ‘depression’ nonsense will probably float right out your ear.

The only thing I agree on is that the mind has amazing power to tailor itself upon what someone beleives. If you beleivethere is no help for you than guess what…you will probably lie to yourself over abd over until you believe something else. If you beleive that there is ANYTHING wrong with you, there is. It’s called your attitude. Having a cancerous tumor in your brain is a problem. Having a few misgivings about your life is not. Having a down day or two is certainly not.

to jester- Is that badly written page on some low-budget website (your link) supposed to convince anyone of anything? That (again) is the bottom percentile. You have any more unregistered websites you want to point out while they’re still fashionable? Hmm?

Friggin dolt.

By Mark

April 21, 2008 11:23 AM | Link to this

Bill - snap out of it and change the blog subject!

By jester

April 21, 2008 1:47 PM | Link to this

Get Real:

There you go again, proving to everyone what an idiot you truly are. So the World Health Organization is a “badly written page on some low-budget website”? It’s official now, folks. getreal has proven once and for all that he is a complete idiot and should be taken out to the pasture, shot, and put out of all of our misery. getreal, do all of us a favor and just kill yourself. Put yourself out of our misery. Please. It’s just a shame that the World Health Organization isn’t sponsoring a study to cure stupid. Then, perhaps, get real could get the help he needs.

Dumbass sniper.

By Southern Born

April 21, 2008 3:40 PM | Link to this

Lots of compelling discussion on this important topic, with some very courageous people spilling their guts in response to Bill’s courageous opening.

Then the trolls came out. Please don’t feed the trolls.

I’ve dealt with a few episodes of major depression myself. The combination of meds and counseling helped tremendously, which confirms what seems to be the consensus in the research community.

Meds helped me because they reduced the white-hot intensity of my depressed feelings to where I could function again; counseling helped me correct much wrong thinking and begin to deal with the childhood wounds that set the stage for dysfunction in the first place.

God bless all those who struggle with this.

By Get Real

April 22, 2008 11:24 AM | Link to this

Jester- you are dismissed. WTF? you think that badly-programmed opinion page on some unregistered second rate website is every doctor in europe? I got news for you son, I keep a gun around for people who make statements like yours. Nobody on this whole site has it in their power to drag me anywhere, I will stomp that a*.

The only one who needs to be drug anywhere and shot is obviously you for being like a lame dog. I am not the one crying to the ajc about how your such a loser you can’t go outside and handle your affairs because your life is too depressing. Get over yourselves, the only thing wrong with you is your p** attitudes.

By jester

April 22, 2008 12:11 PM | Link to this

getreal….There you go. The last resort of a fool who has been proven wrong….to attack those who have shown him the error of his ways. And thusly further destroy his credibility. This is great! You do all of the work, proving that you are a moron who deserves no credibility whatsoever. Way to go.

I have grown tired of your act and that is why I spoke up. You are a p** little bully with nothing better to do than issue idle threats while hiding behind the petticoats of your anonymity. Do you not understand how useless this makes you look? How old are you, providing such puerile arguments to make a point?

I defy you to find a doctor who is inline with your nonsensical ravings. I have provided information that backs up my statements. What have you done? Issue idle threats? Sorry, but they don’t validate your point. Show us some research from someone with a doctorate stating that depression is just a person in a bad mood that can “snap out of it”. I defy you to produce such information.

In the meantime, since you have absolutely NOTHING of any value to contribute, please just log off and find some other place where knuckle-draggers like yourself congregate and do whatever it is y’all do. Leave these people alone as they have done nothing to your dumbass.

To everyone except getreal. I apologize for dragging this thing through the mud with this idiot getreal. I just can’t sit idly by while a p** little bully prick picks on those who have done nothing to him.

Y’all have a good day.

By Mark

April 23, 2008 12:22 PM | Link to this

Get Real

Your proctologist called. They found your head.

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By Colorado Loner

September 22, 2008 10:25 PM | Link to this

Depression? This is my life: Symptoms are:

1) Habitual Quitter … Job, relationships, any & everything

2) Remain Locked inside. Won’t go out unless I need food or cigarettes

3) Irregular sleep … yikes. Can’t get into any cycle and waking up refreshed? Forget it.

4) Personal Hygiene …. Sometimes a week or more will pass before I shower. When the odor is beyond my tolerance … I manage to clean up. Perhaps overstated but not far off the mark.

5) News hound … watching the news 24-7 and feeling there is no hope for country, community etc., and reeling from the world that is now a reality.

6) No desire for social interaction. I’d rather (MUCH rather) be alone. I won’t even nod to my neighbor. I wont answer the door, phone or even emails.

7). Suicide? No immediate plan, but seems feasible as a retirement option when money runs out.

8). I have no idea what the hell my purpose in life is … other than there is no purpose.

9)Absolutely discouraged about everything.

Any enlightened opinions on how severe is the neurosis? I want to be feel good about life again but have forgotten how.

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