Blogaroni has moved!
Home > Bino's Blogaroni > Archives > 2007 > January > 24
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
Rock and Roll Hydrate
Will it come in a “Purple Haze” flavor?
A California company is marketing a Jimi Hendrix-themed energy drink, bringing beverage immortality to a rock star who died of a drug overdose 37 years ago. Story here.
Hey Joe, what you doin’ with that Red Bull in your hand?
The “Liquid Experience” drink will undoubtedly be the kind of boost you’ll need to negotiate Crosstown Traffic, especially during those days when The Wind Cries Mary.
Some Hendrix fans will likely be miffed that their guitar hero has been reduced to a marketing tool for a drink company.
But we here at The Blogaroni have already embraced the notion that there is really no such thing as a counter-culture hero over time — yesterday’s anthem of rebellion is tomorrow’s credit card commercial soundtrack — and that one day all rebels will be swallowed by the great maw of commerce.
With that in mind, we have been imagining what other beverage products linked to aging rock-and-rollers we might soon see in the marketplace. Here are some Blogaroni predictions:
The Born to Be Wild Berry Smoothie
Inspired by the band Steppenwolf, this is certainly a drink that will get your motor running in the morning. You’ll start your day firing all of your guns at once, exploding into your work space like a true nature’s child. With any luck, it won’t get you fired.
The Lite My Fire Beer
You’ll be trying to set the night on fire with this new lite beer brewed in cooperation with The Doors. Whether you’re a rider in the storm, or just some American woman, this is the brew for you.
Orange Hush
Deep Purple’s gone heavy on the taste with this citrus soda.
Stawberry Alarm Clock Daquiri Mix
You’ll detect traces of incense and peppermints in this new party mixer.
Inna-Gadda-Da-V8
Iron Butterfly’s version of the popular vegetable juice cocktail. The drink to have when you’ve got nothing else better to do for the next 17 minutes.
Creedence Clear Water
This exciting new beverage has created a revival in the bottled water business, and is clearly a preferred bottled water to the attempts of other rock bands to capitalize on the market, especially The Doobie Brothers, who have found a resistant marketplace to their product, Black Water.
Cream soda
You’ll clap a ton over this new beverage that will become the sunshine of your love and have your heart pounding like a double-bass-drum infarction.
Feelin’ Gravy
Slow down, you’re moving too fast. This Thanksgiving, trim that turkey with a mellow gravy patented by Simon & Garfunkel.
Dance to the Mueslix
Cereal maker Kellogg’s teams with Sly and Family Stone to bring you something extra-funky to pour into your morning cereal.
Ain’t No Mountain Dew High Enough
You’ll want to stop in the name of flavor, after you taste what The Supremes have done to this popular soft drink.
