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December 2007
Aren’t they Spice Women yet?
Now they’re all Scary Spice
The Spice Girls, Britain’s answer to the Beach Boys, has formed up again, beginning a reunion tour.
The Spice PTA Girls Women
We know it’s practically the law that every once-popular defunct music act must eventually take the stage again for a reunion tour.
But when you’ve got the name “girls” in your title, there ought to be a statute of limitations.
Crossing the line
We here at the Blogaroni think that a reasonable cut-off point would be that if you’re closer to menopause than you are to being in high school, you need to stop calling yourself a “girl.”
Just as once the first Beach Boy gets a prostate exam, it’s over.
The Spice Girls are Ginger Spice, Posh Spice, Scary Spice, Sporty Spice and Baby Spice.
Baby Spice, the youngest of the group, is going to be 32 next month.
Anyway, the point is, you shouldn’t look like Hannah Montana’s mom and call yourself a “girl.”
The Spice Girls made a poor career choice of selecting the word “girls” in their name.
If right from the start, they had called themselves the Spice Dwarfs — Sneezy Spice, Grumpy Spice, Sleepy Spice, Bashful Spice, and Dopey Spice — they could tour well into their Red Hat Society years without raising any complaints from The Blogaroni.
Time to evolve
Instead of trying to entertain 13-year-old girls, we here at The Blogaroni think the Spice Girls should move up to the next level, and get into the middle-aged women TV talk show business.
Instead of being The Spice Girls, they could be The Spice View , a bunch of women sitting around a table and drinking from huge mugs of coffee as they discuss the issues of the day.
It’s a perfect solution. The cast of The View needs a rest, and The Spice Girls need to find an entertainment outlet that’s more age appropriate.
The Old View
The Spice View
