Q: My 21-year-old daughter, "Kelly," has worked in a small retail store for several months. She recently spotted a shoplifter trying to steal a pair of shoes by wearing them out of the store.

No one had told Kelly how to deal with shoplifters. She tried to delay the thief by talking with him, then picked up the phone to call her boss, who was in the back. The shoplifter ran out the door and was long gone by the time the manager arrived.

Kelly's boss immediately started yelling at her, saying things like "Why did you let him go?!" and "Can't you do your job right?!" Now Kelly is afraid to talk to her manager.

Kelly is upset about her unfair treatment, but she needs to keep this job until she finishes college. The pay is good, the location is close to home and she enjoys the work. What do you think we should do about this?

A: Kelly's manager was clearly out of line, since tackling criminals is not part of her job description. But if the boss never has yelled at Kelly before, she probably should cut him or her a little slack.

Just as Kelly wasn't trained in handling shoplifters, so her manager may not have been trained in leadership skills. And he or she was undoubtedly caught up in the heat of the moment.

MARIE G. McINTYRE

OFFICE COACH

To prevent a repeat performance, Kelly needs to clarify expectations. For example: "Mr./Ms. Smith, I really wasn't sure what to do when I saw that guy stealing shoes. What is our policy about shoplifters?" If no policy exists, she might suggest developing one.

Kelly is old enough to handle problems on her own but young enough to learn from those with more work experience. You may be inclined to defend your child, but you can be more helpful as a coach and a mentor.

Q: I recently joined an office of four women working for a female manager. During the interview, my boss said that a uniform would be provided. I assumed it would be similar to the pantsuit she was wearing.

To my surprise, I was given a satin shirt and black miniskirt with a slit in the back. The skirt is very revealing, especially when I sit down. My co-workers don't seem to mind, but I feel like a hooker.

My boss turned down my request for a longer skirt. I like this job, but the outfit makes me uncomfortable. Any suggestions?

A: If you were selling lingerie or running the Playboy mansion, this costume might be appropriate. But in a normal business office, suggestive attire usually is considered unprofessional.

Because your boss vetoed a skirt switch, your choices seem limited. One option, if this skirt has a hem, is to increase the length as much as possible, then see if she objects.

If she's adamant about the sexy garb, you'll have to weigh your enjoyment of the job against your discomfort with the attire.

- Marie G. McIntyre is an Atlanta-based workplace coach. Her weekly column is syndicated by Knight Ridder/Tribune News Service. Send questions at www.yourofficecoach.com.