Q: I simply cannot work with the new person in my department. I am 24 years old and the administrative assistant to the sales director. He recently hired a sales representative who is 52 and used to be a manager in another company.
This woman seemed nice until I corrected her paperwork and told her how to do it properly. That started a confrontation between us. Since then, she watches everything I do. I hate her, and I know she hates me, too.
Being around this lady makes me sick. Whenever she comes into my office, I feel like telling her to stay away from me. All the other sales reps say that they don't like her, either.
What can I do about this?
A: Your extreme emotional reaction is the real issue here. Saying "I hate her" and "she makes me sick" sounds pretty immature. This woman is just a difficult co-worker, not Attila the Hun.
To be successful, you must learn to work with obnoxious people without becoming one yourself. You will meet many more of them during your career.
Even if you don't like each other, you and your adversary have to work together. So overlook her annoying traits and avoid arguing with her. If she acts like a child, you need to be the adult.
If you're expected to review her paperwork, remember that management establishes the standards, not you. Have your boss talk with her about necessary corrections.
Finally, consider that a 52-year-old former manager might be somewhat anxious about starting a new job at this point in her career. Try to muster up a little sympathy. If she's really as bad as you say, she won't be around long.
- Marie G. McIntyre is an Atlanta-based workplace coach. Her weekly column is syndicated by Knight Ridder/Tribune News Service. Send questions at www.yourofficecoach.com.