Q: I am a fairly new manager. One of my employees frequently talks back to me. His attitude clearly doesn't serve as a good example for the other employees.
Every morning, I have a short staff meeting, and so far this guy hasn't shown any signs of wanting to attend. I told him that I might need his input and asked if he's ever going to join the meetings. He replied that he saw no point in it.
The last thing I want to do is to fire him, but I need him to change. What should I do?
A: Disruptive employees must believe that you will assert the authority of your position. When you "ask if he's ever going to join the meetings," you don't sound much like a manager. In fact, you sound like you're begging. So stop making weak requests and start making strong statements. First, agree with your boss and human resources manager about the appropriate consequences for continuing to skip meetings. Then tell this obstinate fellow that he must attend and explain why.
For example: "I know you would prefer not to come to the daily meetings, but I do expect you to be there. I need for everyone to hear the same information and share opinions. So I expect to see you at the meeting on Monday."
Clearly outline what will happen if he fails to show, then end the conversation. Do not argue about it. If he's absent again, impose the consequences without delay and repeat your expectation that he be at the meetings.
If he continues to be rude and rebellious, consult with your HR manager about the appropriate next steps.
Q: I am an administrative assistant in a small company. One female employee is constantly touching the boss, who is married.
I have seen her pat his hair, rub his shoulders and lean her very large chest over him as he sits at his desk. She bats her eyelashes and caters to his every whim.
I don't think this is at all appropriate. What's your opinion?
A: To put it bluntly, I think you should mind your own business and focus on your work. You are an employee, not the manager or the morality monitor. If these people are doing something improper, they have to suffer the consequences in their personal lives.
Your boss could discourage this attention if he wanted to, but he apparently likes it. If their flirty relationship makes you too uncomfortable, consider taking your administrative talents elsewhere.
- Marie G. McIntyre is an Atlanta-based workplace coach. Her weekly column is syndicated by Knight Ridder/Tribune News Service. Send questions at www.yourofficecoach.com.