This is the weekend we pay homage to deceased loved ones, specifically those who died in wars. It's the busiest time of the year at cemeteries, and it's one of the top weeks for florists.
Depending on your family traditions, you may spend this weekend visiting graves, holding picnics and family reunions, watching parades or visiting loved ones in care centers.
Or you may spend your extra day off shopping the sales that have sprung up like dandelions. The reality for many busy families is that these Monday observances of national holidays provide rare opportunities to conduct major consumer errands, such as furniture-buying, without feeling exhausted from other duties.
None of these activities, traditional or otherwise, involves work or a focus on our careers. This is largely for the best; we need a few days off from this pursuit, after all. Still, in preparing for my own Memorial Day weekend and a new responsibility this year of tending a family member's grave, it occurs to me: We have no tradition, formal or informal, for recognizing and thanking those who have helped us in our careers.
Well, that's not entirely true. We have National Boss Day in October and Administrative Professionals Week in April. But these are "bouquet" events designed more to curry favor than to express heartfelt acknowledgment of someone's sacrifice on our behalf.
But what about people who mentored us at work, often giving up hours to guide us (or hear us vent), only to stay late to finish their own assignments? What about those who went out of their way to find learning opportunities for us or to teach us new skills? Or those who went to bat to save a job or create a new position?
And, more dramatically, what about those co-workers or bosses who stepped in to save a career (or a life) for a worker who was drinking too much or needed some other kind of intervention?
You're most likely to have been the beneficiary of these and countless other gifts when you were just starting out in your field. Sadly, that's also when you're least likely to have recognized what an effort someone else was making on your behalf — or even how much your career needed salvaging at that point. With the arrogance and innocence of youth, we often feel entitled to all the help we can wheedle out of someone, regardless of the price he or she pays to give it to us.
I never would suggest an abridgement of Memorial Day for work purposes, but I do have this suggestion: While you're going about your usual traditions this weekend, if you have quiet time to spare, why not cast a thought to those who have lent you a hand along the way?
Specifically, you might reflect on these people:
• supervisors or managers who trained you or guided your career;
• teachers who taught you skills you use on the job;
• co-workers who made your workdays more enjoyable or bearable;
• mentors and counselors who have advised you;
• friends who have supported you, particularly by hearing your complaints;
• family members who have sacrificed or delayed their own goals so that you could reach yours; and
• colleagues or leaders in your field whose work has influenced yours.
You also might think about colleagues who have passed away or who left their jobs to deal with illnesses.
All this reflection doesn't need to lead to any action, but I wouldn't rule it out. Once you start on this path, it might feel very natural to send a note or e-mail to tell someone how his or her kindness has affected your life or career. An invitation to lunch or coffee may be in order.
You may be inspired to lend someone else a hand. The funny thing about moving up the ladder is that you become the one who can help others. You may not feel the title fits you very well, but, to those who are new to the field, the role is yours.
Because you probably can't directly pay back the people who helped you, now might be a good time to return the favor in kind by helping others. Maybe that's not so far removed from the spirit of Memorial Day, after all.
- Amy Lindgren owns Prototype Career Service, a career consulting firm in St. Paul, Minn. She can be reached at alindgren@prototypecare rservice.com or at 1071 W. Seventh St., St. Paul, MN 55102.