Q: I manage the gift shop at a beautiful, historic winery. This is a wonderful place to work, but we do encounter customers with challenging personalities.
My problem is that I have several employees who complain about how stupid the customers are and what dumb questions they ask. This ongoing negativity is eroding the atmosphere in what should be a warm and friendly workplace.
I have tried asking everyone to be more positive, but the negativity spreads like a disease. Also, we don't work in a bubble, so I'm sure that customers overhear these comments. What can I do to stop this unproductive, catty chatter?
A: Relieving job stress by sharing customer stories is one thing, but trashing the very people who provide your livelihood is quite another. As a manager, you must help your employees understand the difference.
Disdainful attitudes are particularly out of place in a winery, where less-sophisticated shoppers often feel ill at ease. If staff members are condescending, customers may depart quickly without buying anything.
To encourage empathy, have employees recall their own interactions with aloof or haughty salespeople. Ask what could have been done to make them feel more comfortable and respected. Emphasize that successful salespeople consistently serve all customers with a spirit of understanding and helpfulness.
You can acknowledge that some customers are annoying, rude and demanding. If employees need to vent about these inevitable irritations, they must follow one cardinal rule: Never, ever talk about any customer when other customers are around. Gripe sessions can occur in the break room, but they're absolutely forbidden on the sales floor.
To nip negativity in the bud, clearly communicate customer-service standards as soon as new employees start work. Establishing these expectations upfront will help to shape their behavior in the desired direction.
Q: When a new guy joined our department last year, there was a definite attraction between the two of us. But after we had a disagreement about work, he became very cautious around me.
We recently had to travel together on some three-day trips, and I was quite apprehensive about how things would go. Although the work went fine, I found myself acting like a silly schoolgirl and trying to sit closer to him whenever we were together. He was also sitting close but seemed very controlled about what he said to me.
Now that we are back at the office, I feel stupid about my childish actions. I sent him an e-mail to say that I enjoyed his company and hope he did not object to my behavior. But instead of feeling better, I feel worse than ever. Please help me salvage this working relationship, because we have to spend a lot of time together.
A: I don't know how far this "attraction" went, but at this point you need to let it go. Your co-worker clearly is signaling that the relationship has changed, so forget your past flirtation and focus on the job.
When you're around your former heartthrob, act as you would with any other male business associate. Don't become playfully flirtatious or talk about previous romantic encounters. If you continue to behave like a mature and businesslike colleague, the whole episode eventually will recede into the past.
- Marie G. McIntyre is an Atlanta-based workplace coach. Her weekly column is syndicated by Knight Ridder/Tribune News Service. Send questions at www.yourofficecoach.com.