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DEL.ICIO.USCoping with the loss of a loved one this holiday season?
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
While usually the holidays are reserved for happy times spent with family and friends, for those that have experienced the loss of a loved one recently, it can be difficult and painful. I experienced a death in the family this summer and as the holidays approached, surviving family members and myself felt a sense of dread. We opted out of a traditional Thanksgiving feast, and managed to get through the day, but of course Christmas has a much longer life-span in society. It’s difficult to escape the Christmas music and decorations in every store and co-workers cheerfully chattering about their holiday plans. We don’t want to dampen other’s holiday spirit, so we simply try to play along while avoiding overt celebrations like holiday parties. We skipped putting up a tree and decorating the house. It’s definitely a very surreal experience, and at times, lonely.
Of course, other families dealing with death might choose to immerse themselves in the holidays as a way to boost their spirits and celebrate the life of their loved one. Others might choose to give back to others by volunteering. There’s no right or wrong way to mourn.
For Christmas, we rented a cabin in the North Georgia mountains, which will be a neutral site to have a muted celebration. I’m sure as the years pass we can return to more normal, spirited holiday gatherings, but the first year is certainly a rough time emotionally. While relatives can get on each other’s nerves very quickly during the stress of holiday get-togethers, it’s not until they are gone that you realize most of those flare-ups were petty compared to their overall positive presence. Life can be much too short sometimes, so love them, warts and all, while you still can.
Have you experience the loss of a loved one this year? How are you coping with the holidays?
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