Home > Health > MOMania > Archives > 2008 > December > 30
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
What to tell kids when a pet needs to be put to sleep?
My mother’s dog had to be put to sleep yesterday, and I had to tell the kids. How would you explain putting animals down to children?
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
We had a heated discussion yesterday about revealing plot points in the new movie “Marley and Me.” (I don’t think anyone was trying to blow a big secret. I think their point was it may not be appropriate for small children.) I have not read the book and have not seen the movie but I am assuming something bad happens to the cute dog.
Well, coincidentally, my mother’s dog, who she has had for 17 years, has been ill and had to put down yesterday. The dog was in kidney failure and wasn’t eating or using the bathroom. The dog has been blind for a while and has had other conditions the vet has been watching.
It was heartbreaking for my mother. She cried most of the day. (I was sad and crying too but not nearly as much as my poor mom.)
I wanted to let the kids know what was happening to the dog. I’m not a big fan of deceiving kids. I believe in giving them appropriate details. I wanted to give them a chance to say good-bye if they wanted to. I also didn’t want them looking for the dog a week from now saying, “Where in the world is Mimi’s dog?”
So I told them that Mimi’s dog was very ill and had to be taken to the vet. The vet was going to give the dog a shot to put her to sleep and then she would die. I told them the vet couldn’t make her feel better and she was suffering. I told them that doctors never did that to people so not to worry.
My 5-year-old understood what I told him and moved on. My 7-year-old daughter was very sad. She cried for a while. She said she didn’t want to say good-bye to the dog. I think she didn’t want to think about it anymore.
My brother hasn’t told his kids yet. I’m not sure what he’s planning to say.
Have you ever had to tell kids that their pet or a friend’s pet was going to be put to sleep? What words did you use? How much description did you give? Or do you prefer the old “the dog ran away” approach? How much transparency should you have with your children when bad or upsetting things happen?
Check out more information about pets on AJCPets
Permalink | Comments (31) | Post your comment | Categories: Ethics of rearing kids today
