MOMania

By deidre_NC

July 28, 2008 6:53 AM | Link to this

first of all i cant imagine why anyone would take kids this young to the beach. kudos to you and our husband for the bravery lol..i would take the family on a shorter vacation and then take my husband and i on a short one alone..after the breastfeeding is over of course. but thats just me..looking for easy. i had a post in my mind then i realized that you would be staying with family, so that does sorta change things. at a hotel there is usually an outside shower to rinse off the sand so i would use that instead of 6 baths a day. geeze that would kill my back!! if the grandparetns have one use it! you can only hope that the family members will want to pitch in and help take care of the kids some. but you cant expect it of course. i dont know theresa, taking 3 small kids anywhere where its out of their normal space is hard imo. i rarely did it. maybe see if there is anything you can leave at home and maybe borrow or rent at your destination. (like pack and play, high chairs, etc) all i can say is good luck to you!! maybe you should have a 3 or 4 day nanny on stand by for when you return so yo can rest after your vacation!!!…i admire your bravery!!! hope yo have a little fun and some alone time with hubby!! you deserve it!

By It'sNotThatHard

July 28, 2008 8:01 AM | Link to this

It doesn’t have to be so hard. We vacationed at the beach with a 10 month old and just turned 3 year old. For the sand, have you heard of the baby powder trick? Just dust it on liberally, then brush off. Sand and powder come right off. Sure, they’re a little white, but they smell fresh and they’re probably going back into the water after lunch anyway. You just want to make sure to wipe off the powder residue before reapplying sunscreen, but that’s still easier than a bath. And do you really need to haul all that stuff with you? Is one week without child locks on the cabinets undoable? And it’s an extra expense, but there are places that rent baby items like a stroller and pack ‘n play so you don’t have to bring it with you. We used www.babysaway.com. They even have beach toys. And can you ask your in-laws to stock a few items for you? My husband’s family keeps diapers, baby wash and the like for when any of their 3 kids’ families visit.

This is beginning to sound like a rant, but let me finish by saying why shouldn’t it be a vacation for the SAHM too? What works in our family is to agree ahead of time that both Mom and Dad get at least one morning and one afternoon alone to do whatever he or she wants. Daddy can watch the kids, whom he doesn’t get to see much during a regular week anyway, while Mommy goes shopping or walks on the beach, whatever. On a different day, Mommy returns the favor.

OK. That’s my piece. Hope it helps. Relax! It should be a vacation and it can be fun.

By lakerat

July 28, 2008 8:02 AM | Link to this

Yes, you are being grumpy! This goes right along with your topic last week about do kids make you happy. Get over it and enjoy the chaos and extra work while you can - the kids, even the one still in diapers, will be gone before you know it!

By new mom

July 28, 2008 8:07 AM | Link to this

I can imagine that taking three kids to the beach would be a lot of work, but I think you are definitely doing the right thing by still taking them on vacation. (and hopefully not complaining in front of the kids too!) They deserve those childhood memories, even if it’s hard on us mommies. :)

Granted we only have our one 10 mth old baby, but we’ve already taken her to disney world and are planning her beach trip for her one-year birthday. We want her to know that we took her places even before she was ‘old enough’ to remember them, just because she will enjoy them now in her own way.

All that being said, it seems like the beach would a) get old, and b) be a lot of work time after time. Have they been to disney world, where they can have fun too, but doesn’t require mid-day showers?

I don’t mean to sound like a disney commercial, but a few years ago, we bought into disney’s vacation club and now we can take vacations there, disney cruises, and exchanges all over the world. (and to beach spots too!) We are so thankful that we did, it was an investment up front, but now we can take vacations each year without sweating the money for accomodations. It almost forces you to take your needed vacations!

By Kathy

July 28, 2008 8:10 AM | Link to this

You are right on target. Taking young children to the beach is a major undertaking. We just recently went to our favorite beach house on the fabulous St. George Island (future topic idea…..great places to take your family on vacation). We only have one child and I still felt like I packed everything but the kitchen sink. I put as much into our suburban as it would hold. I agree with Deidre…..use the outdoor shower if you have one! Six baths a day would make me stay home!

By jg

July 28, 2008 8:13 AM | Link to this

Relax….it will be fine - you will treasure these moments forever and the kids will have a blast. You are right it still is alot of work on Mom (which you still need a Mommy break or Mommy and Daddy break) - but if you have the opportunity to take a vacation with the kids GO FOR IT…don’t look at all the work that goes into it - just enjoy the kids and seeing the beach and the ocean through their eyes. You will cherish every precious moment….

I spent many years as a single mom and I was blessed to take my 3 young children to the Caribbean and Hawaii…they were fine…you will find they are more satistied just playing for hours in the sand..

Fast forward - just took the family (and grandchild) to St Thomas for a week - same scenario - Mom still cooking and planning everything - but to get up in the morning - pack a cooler and spend the day making “birthday cakes” with a bucket and shovel with my granddaughter I would do it again tomorrow.

Enjoy yourself!

By It'sNotThatHard

July 28, 2008 8:15 AM | Link to this

Forgot to address the chasing of the kids with the white hands: Use the spray-on sunblock! Kids don’t have to stand still as long and it’s breeze to apply and reapply.

By new mom

July 28, 2008 8:15 AM | Link to this

I forgot to add this—what about considering taking a babysitter along on vacation? I know that lots of teenage girl babysitters would love a ‘free’ week at the beach, getting to play with kids they already know, which would at least take some stress off of mom.

But after reading this again, I’m struck with: why isn’t daddy taking more of a lead while on vacation? He’s away from the kids lots of the time due to work, right? It would seem that he would want to spend as much time with them as he can, which would give mom some down time. Just a thought :)

By It'sNotThatHard

July 28, 2008 8:35 AM | Link to this

OK, I lied. That wasn’t my piece. I do have to agree with posters above. Yes, yes, you’re being grumpy. I would be grateful that I could still afford to drive to Hilton Head with recent gas prices (yes, I know they’re dipping this week, according to news reports) and that I had a free place to stay. The kids get to visit grandparents, grandparents get to spoil kids, Mom and Dad would presumably get some time alone together or just plain alone. Why would his parents invite you to stay, but not help watch the kids while you go watch a movie? Get over it and go stick your head in the sand. Or pull it out. Or something.

By Jesse's Girl

July 28, 2008 8:58 AM | Link to this

This is why we rent a house on or near the beach. I do not like dealing with elevators and other people when I am trying to relax and unwind. We vacation in Hilton Head as well. We usually stay in Sea Pines and rent a house with its own pool. With a house that is 2 or 3 rows back, biking to the beach is a breeze…or even walking if the weather is super nice. I just don’t like the whole condo experience. We love being able to have our own space and room to move around….the kids really appreciate it! When on vacation…Jesse is usually in charge of beach time. He knows I am a super-wuss when it come to the ocean. I cannot make myself go in beyond my knees…too freaky! But thankfully, my irrational fears have not affected the kids…they adore the ocean! So, Jesse does that and I cook every meal. No vacation there:) But I don’t mind. I love cooking while they swim in the pool knowing that I will be in it soon!

If you stay in the place that suits your personality best…vacationing is awesome! I don’t stress because I know I’m dealing with other people at the pool who want to talk my ear off or watch for weirdos in the condo/hotel. The only weirdos I need worry about are my own.

By JJ

July 28, 2008 9:25 AM | Link to this

HELLO EVERYONE!! I’m back and ready to go. The surgery went well, and two bad glands came out. I’m back at work today. Thankful to get out of the house. Thanks again for all your thoughts and prayers……

Great topic today. I love going to the beach. We have always gone with my brother and his family, and my mom, so there were plenty of us to watch the three kids. Everyone got their own “down” time every day, while the others watched the kids.

We love taking them to the beach. Now that they are older, 17, 16 & 12 they don’t require as much attention. The older kids can go down to the beach by themselves, but they can’t get in the water without adult supervision.

We usually vacation as a family so there are three adults watching 3 kids. We always have a grand time.

Theresa, I think you are stressing too much. Relax, relax on the rules, and enjoy your time at the beach. Vacations are for relaxing, and getting away from the usual routine. Let the kids be kids and chill. However, I would insist Michael spend more time with the kids, since he is away from them most of the time. Have him take the older two to the pool and/or beach, and you hang out with the baby. Enjoy some one on one.

By Julie

July 28, 2008 9:29 AM | Link to this

First off -you need to really chill out about the baths! Why on earth would you bathe each kid twice a day? Most resorts and condos on Hilton Head have pools -perfect for dipping the kids in after beach time. Split the day between the beach and the pool and they don’t need a bath after the pool! Going to sleep chlorinated is a rite of summer! Kids are a lot like dogs -they aren’t nearly as bothered by being dirty as we are by their being dirty. Also -instead of one of those silly and complicated tents, take a couple of good large umbrellas. Sams and Costco have great ones that don’t blow away for $13 a piece this summer. As for naps -park the smallest under the umbrella in a jog stroller. My 2 year old son has taken some of his longest naps on the beach in his jog stroller! As far as lugging stuff to the beach -buy a Wonder Wheeler from One Step Ahead-fantastic and worth the money (do not buy cheap knock offs -the wheels fall off) -or use a wagon. Another thing I LOVE about Hilton Head are all the bikes and kid carriages for bikes that you can rent very cheaply. There are so many beach access points there for bikes -just ride it out onto the beach with the trailer loaded with all your beach stuff! I’ve done this several times, and will be doing it again when we go to HHI in August. Also -if you need some extra room, your two oldest are old enough to lug their own toys out to the beach. And back to the bathing thing -when they do have to have a bath -throw them all in there together! If you really have no pool access, hose them off really well, towel dry them and be done with it. I’m also sure with family around that you and hubby can steal at least a few hours one evening for a stroll on the beach and a drink. Definitely use the spray on sunscreen, take a cooler that rolls and can be rolled/dragged through the sand and ENJOY watching your kids frollick in the waves and on the beach! Who cares if your one-year-old eats some sand? My son went to the beach during his 1 year period 4 times last year and ingested quite a bit of it -and he’s just fine. Get your husband into the helping too -you make it sound like he isn’t pulling his weight, so tell him what he has to do. Also -before you leave -each of you pick out a morning or afternoon -say Tuesday and Thursday where one will sleep in, watch tv, shop or go to a separate place at the beach or pool and relax and read on your own -and then the other gets to do it the other day. Seriously -get some new perspective on the situation. Your kids are going to be BIG fast -you only have a few years for the great pictures and memories of floppy beach-hatted toddlers digging in the sand and gangly little boys racing into the waves. Get down and play with them -build the biggest sand castle on earth! Find a tidal pool and that one-year-old will play in it for hours. There are different types of beach vacations -for most of my adult life and when I can steal the time now -mine have involved drinking a cooler of beer on the beach all day and reading a thriller. Now that I have kids -they involve playing in the sand and water and getting a lot of exercise, but it’s still fun. Aren’t experiences like this with your kids one of the reasons you had them in the first place? You’ll be old one day and the kids will be grown and you’ll have more than enough time to read on the beach.

By Stop Whining

July 28, 2008 9:36 AM | Link to this

Why on earth are you bathing anyone but the baby? Your kids are certainly old enough to manage taking a shower themselves. Perhaps they might need assistance adjusting the water temperature or rinsing their hair completely, but there is no reason that a kid without developmental delays can’t be responsible for taking a shower on their own by the time they are 5.

By Paige

July 28, 2008 9:37 AM | Link to this

Take everything that you think you need and place it in the driveway before packing the car and then……take 1/2 of it back in the house.

When my son was little, we would wear him out in the water and the sand and then let him take his nap in the pack and play under an umbrella and we could sit and enjoy the beach. (The same pck and ply that he slept in at night. What’s with the bed rail?)

Have a great time and relax!

By Leanne

July 28, 2008 9:45 AM | Link to this

Pack enough diapers and swim diapers for a couple of days and buy some when you get to your destination. That will save some packing space.

By new mom

July 28, 2008 10:03 AM | Link to this

JJ, so glad you’re back and healthy! We’ve missed you :)

And back to the vacation topic, the thing I remind myself is that I need to calm down, stop stressing over things being ‘perfect’, and enjoy. Kids are so perceptive, they pick up on our moods and can tell when we are stressed. If we as parents relax, everyone else will too, and EVERYONE will be in a better mood!

By JJ

July 28, 2008 10:18 AM | Link to this

NewMom Thanks, it’s good to be back. I don’t think I could handle one more day at home. My daughter was gone all last week (went to the beach with her cousins), and I was so busy with all the animals. I should have stayed at my Mom’s one more day, and let the kid next door deal with the animals. ha ha..

But, there’s no place like home!!!!

By TaraKaye

July 28, 2008 10:20 AM | Link to this

When I was a teenager, there was a single mom with 2 kids who would take me and my sister (18 months older than me) to the Jersey Shore with her. She and her sister would take their kids (5 total) and the two of us and rent a house for the week. We didn’t get paid for our babysitting, but the free food and free week at the beach was pay enough. We helped at the beach keeping an eye on all 5 kids and one or two nights the women would go out and we’d babysit the kids. They’d also give us some free time of our own. It was a great set-up for all of us. Of course, it met renting a slightly bigger house and having two extra mouths to feed.

If the place you’re staying has a pool or a garden hose. A quick dip in the pool or a nice hose off will pass in the middle of the day just to rinse off the sand.

And I say, enjoy vacationing with kids for the fun the kids are having and the memories you’re making with them. Then go away with just your spouse and leave the kids at home for some relaxation!

By deidre_NC

July 28, 2008 10:22 AM | Link to this

ok..i sounded like a terrible mom…i did take my kids (5) on vacations..but not for such a long time at one..3-4 days was it. and i never felt the need to take everything you seem to need. and i went to places that i didnt have the ‘omg they will drown fear factor.’ we were big campers etc. now my daughter thinks she has to bring everything but the kitchen sink when she took her small kids anywhere. i have a very close friend who takes her kids to the beach for 7 days at least once a year. and usually her older son and daughter take a friend with them. she has one pre school and also an autistic 11 year old. i think she nuts but she loves it and they all have a blast. i think it is a real personality thing as to what kind and how much of a vacation anyone can stand. what one family can do and enjoy doesnt mean all families can do the same and enjoy it. i just really hope your husband and his family give you some much needed break time…alone or with hubby. surely they will. i mean it is YOUR vacation too, right? just take it easier on the number of baths and all the stuff you think you need to bring. back in the day people didnt need near as much for for their kids as now…maybe another good topic…how much stuff do you really need for a kid lol

By Beautiful

July 28, 2008 10:36 AM | Link to this

after coming back from vaca with the kids, i needed a vaca. i’d rather go alone with the SO.

By JJ

July 28, 2008 10:48 AM | Link to this

I take about three to four vacations every year. As a full time single mom, and employee, I need breaks!!!

We go on one family vacation with my entire family, one or two long weekend trips just me and my daughter, and one for just me with the girlfriends.

I always take one additional day off when we get back from vacation, to chill out. I can’t stand coming home late on Sunday, and having to get back to work on Monday. I usually take Mondays off, to chill and get the laundry done, grocery shopping, etc. I worked at my job for over 16 years, so I have accrued plenty of vacation days. That one additional day off really helps me out.

By new mom

July 28, 2008 10:54 AM | Link to this

Deidre, that is a great idea for a blog. There were things I was told I’d ‘have’ to have when we were expecting, but honestly never used! Then things that we ended up needing that I wasn’t prepared for.

Speaking of that, and the vacation thing, are the beach cabanas really that hard to deal with? I had decided to get one for our upcoming beach trip—the reviews were all really great. But now I’m second-guessing it, after reading some of these posts. They still seem like they would be easier to deal with then a giant umbrella! Plus our little one will want to crawl out from under an umbrella, where a tent would keep her ‘contained’…ha ha! :) Any other suggestions? She will be 1 yr old when we hit the beach in september. And we don’t really plan to stay ‘on the beach’ very long at a time, just enough to give her the experience and get some great floppy-hat pictures!

By pj

July 28, 2008 11:11 AM | Link to this

Sure sounds like you guya are all giving Theresa a really hard time. All she’s doing is venting a little before she goes, so she can enjoy what little vacy she gets! I agree completely. Of course now that my daughter is 13, I may not remember what a complete nightmare it was, but as a single parent, I remember I ALWAYS needed a vacation after returning from vacay with my daughter. It was a lot of work, but it was a lot of fun, too. I complained and went anyway - just like Theresa. Cut her some slack!

By CP

July 28, 2008 11:12 AM | Link to this

JJ - Glad your surgery went well. Maybe you need a vacation now yourself! :)

As far as the topic goes, I’m not really one to contribute much. I don’t have the patience to take my kids on vacation right now. Maybe bah-humbug as well but I couldn’t afford it anyway with the 4 of them.

Theresa someone else mentioned getting a babysitter. I was thinking along those lines as well but not about someone else to bring along (& pack their stuff as well if they travel with you.) But maybe you could try to find a babysitter in HH. There’s a HH craigslist that has a childcare posting area. You could see what’s out there if nothing else. Hope all goes well for you & you all have a great time.

By mom3

July 28, 2008 11:14 AM | Link to this

I have three kids, and we go to the beach at least twice each summer - and have their entire lives! I love it! But, it is a lot of work. Two of mine are freckly red heads, and it is a constant battle to keep them from getting burned. We have a cabana tent and love it! It is a little hard to put up, but well worth it. Here’s an idea for the littlest beach goers: buy an inexpensive blow up pool. Set it up under the tent and your toddler will stay under the tent for hours on end playing in the pool! Then you just throw the pool away on the last day. Also, get a big blow up raft for napping under the tent. That even works for the older kids!

By new mom

July 28, 2008 11:29 AM | Link to this

Hi mom3, thanks, that’s a great idea about the blow-up pool. Our baby loves to play in water, so we might do that!

Is your cabana tent really big? The one we’re considering might not be as large as what you have…but I’m not sure what all is out there!

http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2319652

btw—thanks to all the regulars for not minding me turning this blog into a consumer reports special…

By Sarah

July 28, 2008 11:48 AM | Link to this

Summer vacations seem as if they’ve changed a lot since my siblings and I were kids and we all went to cheap beach rental for five days in the summer. Maybe because the place was cheap and had cheap furniture and everything seemed to have been coated with a half inch of varnish or some type of something to protect from the water, nobody fretted over damage. The beach was the one time my mom would relax and enjoy being away from home. Sure we were sunburned and we possibly slept with a little sand in the bed but we lived through it all and the memories are good ones. We vacationed with another family a few times and they traded off keeping the kids at least one night so the adults could slip away to have some kidless time. Once I recall my mom and dad leaving our place alone while we were with the other family and my mom was combing her hair and I couldn’t imagine what they were doing in the rental without us. Duh!!!

By mike Hosley

July 28, 2008 11:54 AM | Link to this

1> as the operator of 1000+ vacation rentals and a father who is hands on, I recommend rentig equipment or asking around which rentals are baby proofed- there are lots of stay at home moms renting out beach houses and more than happy to help you lighten the load by getting the gear organized for you- one way or another, you need to lighten up :-)[http://CloseToTheBeach.com] will organize even the beach toys for you.

By HB

July 28, 2008 12:38 PM | Link to this

Wow. Yes, you are being incredibly grumpy. Sheesh. If vacation is that bad, why are you going? First, it doesn’t have to be this hard. Cut down on the stuff you take — really you’ll be fine without a few things. And why do you absolutely need floats at the beach? If the rip tides at Hilton Head are anything like the Georgia coast, you really shouldn’t be swimming with kids where it’s deep enough to use floats anyway. Splash around where the waves break, hunt for shells, build some sand castles, and save real swimming/floating for the pool. Simplify your life and teach your kids that they don’t need as much junk around to keep them happy as you’ve led them to believe.

For free time, look for places to drop off your older kids for a while. Most beach areas have mini day camps, coastal science programs, etc where you can drop the kids for 3-4 hours. Call around to local museums or upscale hotels/resorts to see what’s available.

And finally, don’t hope that your hosts will be willing to keep the kids for a while so you can see a movie. Ask them if they know a good local babysitter you can hire for an afternoon. If they want to keep your kids a few hours, they will offer at that time. Don’t put them on the spot. As a former beach resident, I know there’s nothing worse than having relatives crash at your house for a week (longer than they ever would bother to visit you if you lived elsewhere) and then pawning off childcare duties because it’s their vacation and they really need a break! Your hosts will probably be exhausted too, so take responsibility and find good options that don’t overtax their hospitality.

By ManOfTeal

July 28, 2008 12:59 PM | Link to this

Ok, how about leaveing the kids with family and you are your husband going on vacation yourselves? If you honestly want relaxation this is really your only option. Bringing the kids = no relaxation.

By mom3

July 28, 2008 2:15 PM | Link to this

New Mom:

Our tent is really huge and hard to put up. We usually go with 3 families, and there are plenty of people to help. With a tent like ours, all four (actually five since it is a pentagon) are open. That means plenty of openings - nobody is ever blocking the door. Plus as the angle of the sun shifts, we can move around and follow the shade the tent makes. The closed tent seems like it wouldn’t have those advantages. Some of the bigger tents kind of fold up like accordians and are easier to put up - although you would need a couple of adults at least. These are the kind that you see at softball tournaments or at tailgating events. Those aren’t too expensive either. And they last for years! Ours blew away once in a waterspout, but withstands the usual beach winds. We put it up on the first day and leave it there until we leave - make sure it is beyond high tide!

By mom3

July 28, 2008 2:18 PM | Link to this

I’m just curious - did you think life with three kids would be easy?!?!?

By Sonya

July 28, 2008 2:36 PM | Link to this

These blog topics have gotten more and more transparent. Sounds like the blogger is trying to make them as inflammatory as possible to try to get more “hits” on the blog!

Instead of p!ssing and moaning about how terrible your vacation is likely to be and then asking for help, why not title the blog “tips for taking children to the beach?”

Oh, right, I forgot. Without getting everyone all stirred up, no one would read the blog.

Good grief. It is a vacation. If you are going to be that miserable on vacation, don’t go!

By 2boys

July 28, 2008 2:52 PM | Link to this

To reduce the frequency of sunscreen applications, purchase full body swim suits. I’ve only found them online. They cover the child from ankles to wrists. Then all you need to worry about is the face, neck, tops of the hands and feet. They are a lifesaver! They dry quickly and my children have never complained about being “hot” in them.

By new mom

July 28, 2008 2:52 PM | Link to this

Mom3, thanks for the info! That kind of tent sounds really cool…probably would be overkill just for the 3 of us, and for our short beach stays, but I can see us trying that in our future!

Thanks again for replying with the tent information—I bet there are others who will benefit from our little tent research today! :)

By Becky

July 28, 2008 3:03 PM | Link to this

Take about a third of the stuff that ou take with you & relax..I’ve never understood the child safety locks anyway..10 kids in my family, 15 grandchilren & 20 great grandkids & none of them have ever gotten into anything in the cabinets!..I just think that a lot of parents are going overboard on useless stuff(another blog)..JJ, welcome back…

By Numbers Guy

July 28, 2008 3:07 PM | Link to this

First and foremost, welcome back JJ. Glad things went well.

We’ve been pretty successful at bringing along a gramma. She gets free food and rental (we do make sure she gets some time to herself), and we get some opportunity to get away from our pride and joy for a bit. Chores, unpacking, house maintenance, everything gets cut three ways instead of two, and everybody has a better time.

Also, I agree with JJ> Be sure to give yourself at least one day at home between travel and when you have to be back at work for laundry, re-adjustment, etc. I did the whole back Sunday night, working Monday thing once, and decided never again. Running all the bloody laundry after work was like adding insult to injury.

By JJ

July 28, 2008 3:33 PM | Link to this

Thank you Becky & NumbersGuy….

As much as I have travelled this great country of ours, I have learned not to stress about packing for trips. I realize if I didn’t pack it, I can buy it at the destination.

When we go to the beach, we buy tons of water toys for the kids. Balls, sand digging equipment, noodles, etc., and then we leave everything at the hotel for the other guests. We do this just about every time we go to PCB……

Also, I love kids, so I usually end up as “camp counselor” with all the kids around the pool. When we go on family vacations, my brother and I are usually the only adults in the pool with the kids. Kids we don’t know come and play with us. We love it. I swear one of these days, I am going to shuck it all, move to the beach, and rent myself out to people who vacation with the kids……I think that’s an untapped market. ha ha….

By Theresa

July 28, 2008 5:07 PM | Link to this

Hey guys - i just logged in to see what was going on — I was definitely feeling stressed out last week when i was working on this column —- Michael was on a business trip for 5 days before we left for the trip so it was me and three kids trying do all the regular stuff plus get ready — we also had to take Walsh to the pediatrician last week - spent four hours there to find out he’s had whooping cough!! You can still get it even if you’ve been immunized (and they all were for it) — so it was on all account a terrible week leading into vacation — Michael has been great — he took the kids yesterday afternoon and I spent about three hours on the beach with his sister (not a child) — really nice!!!! today his step-mother and sister watched the kids for us to see batman and go grocery shopping so also sooooo nice!!!!! so i’m feeling a little bit better — the prep without him at home was hard — he flew in just in time to drive out!! I like the idea of compiling the tips to make it easier!! honest to goodness wasn’t trying to ring up hits just really had a terrible week last week!!!!

By fk

July 28, 2008 7:04 PM | Link to this

I grew up on LI. We went to the beach at least 3-4 days a week for the entire afternoon…most days from about 11:30 till about 5:30-6. Yup, babies and toddlers even napped there. We went to the beach every weekend during the summer, and for two weeks straight when my dad took vacation. During the week, my mom would take a trip or two, to the beach with just the kids. She set boundaries and we abided by them. When my older siblings (my mom had 7 in 8.5 years!) no longer went with us, we invited friends.

I just can’t imagine trekking a ton of toys to the beach. Never had to do that. A couple of pails and a few shovels would suffice along with a ball, maybe a plastic truck. If you wanted a toy, and you walked, you carried it. My son had a large plastic dump truck. We tied a rope to it, and in it, he hauled his beach toys.

Kids love to chase the waves at the water’s edge, dig giant holes, tunnels, etc…never did we have to be entertained at the beach. We even played cards. A youngster can play go-fish. As parents, we’d stand at the water’s edge, sometimes we’d bring our chairs to the water’s edge, and watch the kids for an hour or so at a time. And, the kids were taught not to walk on the blankets! It’s called beach etiquette.

Although I only have one child, my sister and sisters-in-law had 4, 5 & 6 kids apiece and did the same ritual. Sunscreen was applied at home, then reapplied as needed. No big deal…if there was a fight, no treat at the beach.

For the first 14 summers of my son’s life, we spent summer at the beach. Laundry was less. He wore swim trunks all day, maybe two pair, then showered at the beach to rinse the sand, bathed at home, then pjs. The house stayed neat and he was tired and ready for bed after dinner. Love the summer at the beach…nothing to complain about!

We so enjoy HHI…my husband and I go there each fall…a getaway to celebrate our anniversary. Even though we just got back from the beach 2 weeks ago, I already miss the ocean terribly.

By deidre_NC

July 28, 2008 7:21 PM | Link to this

theresa i doubt very many people here really thought you were trying to pile up hits…that wasnt very m=nice for someone to say. i am glad to hear the stress out of your voice…umm tyoe?? hmm…anyway. you sound much better. i was kinda worried about you. i have found (at my ripe old age) that most things that stress you to death end up being ok. have fun and eat some lobster for me!!! i became allergic to shell fish after my last little darling was born…another reason i dont like to go to the beach i guess..cant eat the great stuff!!! WAAA!

By Robert

July 28, 2008 7:59 PM | Link to this

I’m a widower - father of a 5 and a 3 year old. I just spent a week at the beach. It was probably the best vacation I have ever had. We stayed in a condo - the pool was huge and there was a neverending supply of other little kids for my girls to play with. Naps were no problem - they were tuckered out every single day from playing so hard on the beach and by the pool.

So maybe except for all the potty breaks (taking little girls into a mens room is utterly disgusting) - the trip was a success and I can’t wait to go back next year!

By FCM

July 28, 2008 8:00 PM | Link to this

Been there done that, put the T-shirt through a shredder….

Theresa, motherhood is very seldom relaxing for the Mom. Fatherhood is seldom relaxing for the Dad…we just display it differently. Plus, you have admitted to being a bit controlling, I can relate to being controlling myself….Letting go is very, very hard, BUT life is so much better when you do it.

As to the problem at hand. My opinion: One shower a night. Bring extra suits and let them wear a dry one down each time they go. Yes sunscreen, but Rose and Walsh are big enough to help…they can do each others backs and do their own arms and legs…that lets you handle the delicate face and the baby.

What worked for us when we went with family was to do shifts…..Even the teens could watch a toddler for 15 minutes, plus it gave them great time with older cousins. Everyone 16+ needs to agree that its all eyes, ears, and hands on deck at the beach. I have watched ‘Big Boys’ play tag football with ‘Daddy’s’ while ‘Grandpa’s’ showed school agers how to fly a kite. Tweens helping babies build sand castles, while babies slept on great aunts or grandmas shoulders….the Moms were glad to collapse in chairs and just watch it all…for a few minutes until it was time to ‘jump’

It can be done. Have fun!

By Robert

July 28, 2008 8:00 PM | Link to this

I’m a widower - father of a 5 and a 3 year old. I just spent a week at the beach. It was probably the best vacation I have ever had. We stayed in a condo - the pool was huge and there was a neverending supply of other little kids for my girls to play with. Naps were no problem - they were tuckered out every single day from playing so hard on the beach and by the pool.

So maybe except for all the potty breaks (taking little girls into a mens room is utterly disgusting) - the trip was a success and I can’t wait to go back next year!

By FCm

July 28, 2008 8:27 PM | Link to this

JJ!!!!! MISSED YOU GLAD YOU ARE BACK (yep! I am yelling)

Anybody seen Jeff?

By JJ

July 29, 2008 8:00 AM | Link to this

Robert My condolences on being a Widower with two small girls. Your trip sounded wonderful, and yes, taking girls to a men’s room is gross. Heck I’ve seen some NASTY women’s bathrooms myself….

Welcome to our blog family.

By Jeff

July 29, 2008 8:02 AM | Link to this

FCM:

I am around, but little time for posting these days.

Short post on topic:

For vacationing (period), cruising is the way to go. From the time you get on the ship until the time you get off the ship in home port, EVERYTHING is taken care of, and your hardest decision is whether you want chocolate ice cream or vanilla.

For parents, many cruise lines - Carnival and Disney are well known for this - offer camp-type thigns for kids, and you can LITERALLY see your kids only when they come back to your cabin that night to sleep, if you so choose. They’ll be having a BLAST and you get to truly relax… does it get any better?

By Jesse's Girl

July 29, 2008 8:10 AM | Link to this

Yippee….JJ! So happy you are well! Preyed for you girl…

By DM

July 29, 2008 8:10 AM | Link to this

Took my kids when they were young every year from the time they were born. We always had a blast, maybe because the only expectations we had were simply to enjoy each other and have a good time. Your attitude about the work involved is going to rub off on your kids and all they will remember is that mom was a grouch every time they went on vacation with you.They won’t remember finding seashells and sandollars, or chasing crabs at dusk, they’ll just remember grouchy old mom. Seriously? Stay home until they’re older and they don’t need your every waking moment since it appears to be so overwhelming. Or better yet,hire a nanny for the vacation. These years are going to FLY by and you’re going to wonder one day where all the time went.

By adawgfan

July 29, 2008 8:57 AM | Link to this

Jeff for once, you and I agree!! Lol. Cruising (Disney, that is) is definitely the way to go. My husband and I would like to go again next year.

I like the beach, but I wouldn’t take toddlers. Preschoolers, yes. Babies & Toddlers, no. (just my personal preference). Too much sand to get off, difficult to get the sunscreen on and you have to drag EVERYTHING out on the beach. By the time you drag a cooler, floats, beach bag and hold onto a couple of little one’s hands, I’m exhausted. That said, the last time I went to the beach, my husband went to play golf and a great friend of mine helped me with the then four year old. We had a good time, but I was not so eager to repeat it.

Disney cruise is definitely the way to go!

By Kathy

July 29, 2008 10:14 AM | Link to this

DB — How correct you are! Check out some quotes about what vacation means to families at http://home.comcast.net/~weneedavacation/WhatVacationMeans/Quotes.htm It’s absolutely heartwarming!

By JJ

July 29, 2008 10:37 AM | Link to this

This is the first year of my life that I have not made it to a beach somewhere…..Every single year since I was born we have vacationed at a beach. West coast, East coast, Gulf coast, Hawaii, Mexico and the Bahamas…..but not this year. My daughter got to go to the beach last week, and she brought me some sand. I guess that will have to do until next summer.

Any ideas where to take a High School Graduate next June? We want to go someplace tropical, but not too expensive…..

By Lulline

July 29, 2008 10:45 AM | Link to this

Travelling with the little ones can be both stressful & fun.Pack a few diapers or wipes to tide you over until you get to your destination or simply buy those little trial sizes of what you need. I have a 4yo & 6yo and we are always on the go from the time they were born. We never travel with a pack & play, bed rails or high chairs. We like to stay at kid/family resorts because they always have those “extras” we can request. Holiday Inn Sunpree Resorts are my favorite or you can rent a condo/beach home. Most owners don’t mind getting a crib or booster seat and some already have them in storage. For the older kids I get a large plastic bag, that I cut open and use it to have a picnic on the bed when we have to eat in a hotel room. By using a your beach towels as the tablecloth you can then shake out the crumbs and it will absorb any spills. Another idea is to get those small stackable buckets, place their sunglasses, lotion, xtra undies etc in the beach towel and roll it tight then stuff it inside the bucket and put that in one of their old bookbag. This way mom is not stuck carying a heavy bag. For the little ones I suggest getting a backpack to consolidate everything, this way you’ll have your arms free. Don’t forget those cute “Huggies Little Swimmers Sunseekers”. It’s a sun indicator that changes colors and lets you know when it’s time to a add more sunblock. It takes the guess work away and it is very waterproof and will stay on for hours. If you plan on flying try to pack as little as possible and if you plan on bringing a car seat, just put it inside a large, strong garbage bag and check it with your luggage or take it to the gate and check it there, the same goes for strollers. When driving, I have a dual screen DVD player that fits on the back of the driver & passenger seat so the kids can watch a movie.If they want to watch different programs, I have a personal DVD player that I switch out so everyone is happy. My best friend is an activity book with stickers and i’ve learned to glue a small box to the front cover to hold a few crayons and so far so good. As crazy as it sounds when we stay at a condo, it’s a lot easier for us because I can do the laundry and have the kids sort and fold their own stuff. Having your meals on the patio with the ocean breeze blowing is so nice & relaxing and for some reason, the kids are always ready for bed without any drama!

By Penguinmom

July 29, 2008 2:07 PM | Link to this

Okay, I’ll have to admit that the beach isn’t my favorite place with kids because of the sand. It gets into every crevice and can be nearly impossible to get out.

Whoever said that you can use the pool after the beach, don’t you have to rinse them off to do that? So, you are essentially giving them a bath/shower at that point. As far as one at bed time, that’s only if someone dragged us back out to the sand after dinner.

I have to admit the main reason vacations are stressful for parents is their own hangups. No one actually needs to pack everything that Theresa listed. Bedrails?, Pack and play? Most hotels have rollaway cribs that are easy to use and don’t add much to your bill. (Certainly add less than the stress of carrying your own.)
And how often are you reapplying sunscreen? It shouldn’t be a constant thing, one dip in the ocean is not going to remove enough sunscreen to be worthwhile.

Finally, if your kids are running around wild on the beach, it’s partly due to you letting them run wild. I’d set up a perimeter area that they are allowed to play in and if anyone leaves it without permission, they’d be in big trouble. If your kids don’t understand the concept of Big trouble, then I’m not sure you’ve done your job as a parent. A healthy respect for consequences is a necessary component of growing up to be a responsible adult.

By vacation man

July 29, 2008 3:17 PM | Link to this

6 baths a day? No wonder it was no fun….isn’t that a little anal?