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Thursday, March 22, 2007
Do you suffer from “Mommy Guilt”?
Are parents’ expectations of quality time with kids impractical?
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution
Ever get a sinking feeling that you’re not spending as much time as you should with your children? Most moms have at some point. It’s called “Mommy Guilt”, and it can strike at any time. You might feel it when you drop off your baby at day care. It might hit when your preschooler clings to your leg as you’re on your way out the door. Or it might gnaw at you if you realize you have been busy with housework ever since your kids got off of the bus.
Parents today are often so busy juggling work, childcare, school, housework and after-school activities that it can feel like we never just enjoy quality time with our children. But a University of Maryland study says we’re actually spending more time focused on our kids than parents did 40 years ago. The report says that mothers in 1965 spent an average of 10.2 hours per week feeding, reading to and playing with their children. Today, that average has risen to nearly 14.1 hours per week.
So why the Mommy Guilt? The study suggests that our expectations as parents and for our children’s development have also risen. That has forced many to multi-task or simply spend less time doing other things - like sleeping or housework - in order to spend more time with the kids. We may just be too overwhelmed or tired to appreciate those extra hours we have carved out for the little ones.
And, it’s not just the mommies who are spending more time with their children but feeling stretched. Dads are too. The report may discuss Mommy Guilt, but I know several dads who are feeling the pangs of Daddy Guilt as well.
Do you feel Mommy or Daddy Guilt? How do you cope with it? How do you define quality time with your kids? Regardless of how you feel as a parent, do you think your kids are happy with the amount of quality time they spend with you?
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