MOMania

By tired old mom

December 1, 2006 09:05 AM | Link to this

Since my husband always speaks his mind, it would be hard to limit it just to pregancy. His parents scolded him constantly for his words and actions during my pregnancy. Other than that, I was treated like a princess by everyone else. People at work thought I needed chocolate donuts everyday. I don’t even like them now. I had doors opened for me, people smiled at me……….boy I sure miss that.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 09:31 AM | Link to this

I am an ardent fan of slapping people on the back of the head when the situation warrants it. And Theresa…friend….your husband deserved a good thwop for that one! Say it with me….THWOP, THEN SHOP! I’d be happy to do it for you. My situation is reversed. My husband is very good when I am pregnant. He knows better than to say anything other than “Yes dear.” When we were pregnant with our first, his father took him aside and explained that for the next 9 months, he would have absolutely no opinion that differs from mine. I love that man. Its when I’m not with child that the thwopping commences. My sweet, loving husband slips up when my “friend” comes for a visit. For instance….the ars-hole forgot my last birthday. And by forgot, I mean my mother was calling me to ask if she should “remind” him. I said no….her idea of a reminder usually involves throwing something. And I wanted that pleasure. So when I get home from my BIRTHDAY lunch with my friends….I lost it. I ran upstairs crying like a 3 year old. He comes in all apologetic and broken. He holds me and kisses me and then this highly educated man says the stupidest thing in the history of stupid things. “Do you think you’d be this upset if you weren’t on your period?” All I have to say is that it is a damn good thing we are done having kids…..I grabbed him “there” and said….”Does it hurt honey? I wonder, do you think I’d be this upset if you hadn’t forgotten my birthday?”

By Lois

December 1, 2006 10:14 AM | Link to this

I must be one tough lady. I worked full time during my entire first pregnancy, and was in school taking a full courseload during my second pregnancy. I gave birth 9 days after finishing final exams! I managed just fine, and didn’t really feel I needed anyone to placate me or cater to me because of pregnancy. I never used it as an excuse to receive special treatment. When special treatment was freely offered, I sometimes accepted it, but at other times, I felt that I was being patronized.

Did I feel that effects of hormonal surges? Of course, but I took it in stride, just like I take any bad day or strangeness in my life: with an attitude of that’s just the way things are sometimes. Did people sometimes say inappropriate things during my pregnancy? Yes, but people say inappropriate things at many other times, too. When pregnant, as now, it only takes a look from me to let someone know they need to hold their tongue.

By Cliff

December 1, 2006 10:16 AM | Link to this

You women rag men like it’s an occupational hobby, remember when anything we have tried turns out wrong, twist our words around to the meanest possible meaning (even to something that wasn’t even CLOSE to what we had in mind), complain about everything, comments were “insensitive” or “mean”. That doesn’t even include changing from a Poodle to a Pit Bull right after marraige, constantly harping about changing from what we were when you married us and never being satisfied with anything, be it car, house, clothes or checking account. Then you spiral into orbit anythime we make a casual observation or speak the honest truth? My Dad was right. If it weren’t for sex, there would be a bounty on every woman’s head.

By Cliff

December 1, 2006 10:19 AM | Link to this

And then you attribute any bad moods, emotional outbursts or “cravings” to PMS, menapause or hormones. GAWD, the monastary is looking more attractive (and certainly less stressful) more and more.

By Johnny

December 1, 2006 10:23 AM | Link to this

You hit the nail on the head, Cliff. It’s no point trying to use rational or logic when dealing with it. Dogs and men are happy with what they have, generally follow rules and enjoy life. Cats and women do whatever they damn well please and think the world revolves around them and their needs. Ya can’t live with ‘em and ya can’t shoot ‘em.

By AB

December 1, 2006 10:26 AM | Link to this

Thank you Lois! I am 36 weeks pregnant, work full time, plus another part-time job and go to school, I am due less than 2 weeks after finals. I have a great partner who is doing more than their fair share right now, but for the most part I don’t really require any special treatment. I can still hear other people’s opinions and don’t expect to be treated like a princess. I come across stupid people every single day and they will say stupid things, I don’t think telling you that you can’t fit into something is hurtful, if you are growing then NO perhaps you can’t fit into it.

By tired old mom

December 1, 2006 10:27 AM | Link to this

@cliff - you keep threatning but you haven’t left yet. Need a marta token?

By fer

December 1, 2006 10:32 AM | Link to this

Lois, you said it all! Would that more pregnant women would heed your advice.

By rissasmom

December 1, 2006 10:38 AM | Link to this

When I was about 6-7 months pregnant a friend gave me a bunch of her maternity clothes that she no longer needed. One outfit was a pair of pink overalls. One day I wore the outfit out shopping and running errands with ex. As we were exiting Walmart he looked at me with this slight smile on his lips like something had been amusing him and he just couldn’t hold it in any longer. He says to me, ‘where’d you get the pink overalls from?” Then he just couldn’t hold it, he burst out laughing and says I’m sorry babe, but you look like a giant piece of bubble gum! Then he kept trying to hug me and say “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, the whole time he was laughing!!! I was not amused.

Other than that he was pretty accomodating while I was pregnant. One craving I had while carrying was for fried smelt. Smelt is a small little fish that my mother used to cook when I was growing up. I craved that salty crunch taste when I was pregnant. Unfortunately, there was not a smelt to be found in Atlanta at that time. I actually cried! Every day he would bring in some different type of fish to cook. None of them satisfied me. But at least he tried. I will give him credit for that.

By K

December 1, 2006 10:44 AM | Link to this

I think you might be overreacting just a little about the sweater incident, but the traveling comment was surely uncalled-for. There are a lot of things about being pregnant that aren’t very pleasant, and it’s just a fact that they affect you far more than they do him. He needs to understand that life, including travel, does go on during a pregnancy, and he just might have to suck up the reality of some inconveniences on that. You didn’t get pregnant all by yourself, so since he helped with the conception, he can bloody well help and cope with the outcome.

By SkinnyGirl

December 1, 2006 10:47 AM | Link to this

My husband thought it would be funny to start calling me “Chubs” when I was really showing at 6-7 months. I finally told him it hurt my feelings, but this was already after his family and lots of his friends (including poker buddies) were already picking up on the nickname.

I only gained 25 lbs in pregnancy too— and lost 35 afterwards! Tell a 5’6”, 130 lb (170 during pregnancy) woman that she is chubby and she will hate you for life!

By Ashleigh

December 1, 2006 10:49 AM | Link to this

Cliff, there are reasons as to why men and women can’t communicate. Men are more left brained (logical) and women are right brained (creative). We have separate parts to our brain that men don’t possess. I can’t remember what it’s called, but women have this part in the brain that receives an auditory message from another person. Instead of us actually taking in what is being said, that part of the brain DETERMINES what you’re TRYING to say. I’ll be the first girl to say that most women are actually crazy with their thinking, hence why I can’t get along with girls.

By shawnda

December 1, 2006 10:50 AM | Link to this

I am 8 months pregnant. I work a full time job, have a 6 yr old and manage to be room mom. When I ask my husband to do something he throws the biggest fit as if he is the one pregnant. Just for once I would love for him to walk in my shoes and feel how I feel and lets see if he comes out like a champ

By Linda

December 1, 2006 10:54 AM | Link to this

My daughter is 34 weeks pregnant and she is a single mom to be. When she told the baby’s father she was pregnant he seemed somewhat excited and stayed in the picture for a while. He then met another woman and pretty much turned his head the other direction as if he’s never known my daughter, the mother of HIS child. Recently she has experienced some minor complications with the pregnancy and while wanting to make sure the father knew, his only comment to her was “I don’t think that baby is even mine” … Let me add here that we just found out he has a child by another woman and this new lady in his world is about 12 weeks pregnant with his baby also. Wonder if he’ll use that line “I don’t think this baby is mine” on her also. He did with his first baby’s mama, and he did with my daughter. What’s the old saying … “Three times a charm?”

By CD

December 1, 2006 11:02 AM | Link to this

My husband said: “gee, I can’t wait till you have this baby. Then you can go back on your full dose of medication.” (i.e., antidepressants).

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 11:05 AM | Link to this

Ashleigh…perhaps the reason you “can’t” get along with girls is because you have an overabundance of testosterone. I doubt very seriously it is because you see some fundamental flaw in how we women process words. Yes…men and women are a breed apart…that is a given. But lets get one thing clear right now….men whine just as much as women do. Its just about totally different things. I get so tired of hearing people say how logical men are and how oversensitive women are. Its an argument that cannot be won. We can’t live without men and they can’t live without us. We’re stuck.

By Kristi

December 1, 2006 11:06 AM | Link to this

When I was two weeks from having our first child, my husband watched me walk down the hallway & said “I’d love to see you in a penguin suit.” We had friends over and the husband looked at him & told my darling husband “She will never forget that for the rest of her life - idiot!” We all laughed but I have never forgotten it. I did buy him a pair of penguin slippers for a Christmas present later that year so he could be the one walking like a penguin. They were very slippery on the bottom.

By tired old mom

December 1, 2006 11:08 AM | Link to this

Ashleigh, dear, that’s nice. But it really seems like you’re trying to kiss up to the guys.

By Joe

December 1, 2006 11:09 AM | Link to this

When my former size 4 wife was pregnant the first time she packed on the weight fast. She was sitting in front of the TV one day with a half gallon of ice-cream and a spoon eating it from the container and I asked her if she planned on eating this way for the next five months. She gave the standard reply that she was eating for two and I asked for two what, two NFL linebackers. She threw the ice cream at me. She must have forgotten that when she first discovered she was pregnant she told me ” Don’t let me get out of control eating, say something if I start to get that way..” With the second child I never said a word no matter what I saw her eat, I just let it go. Like she did her figure.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 11:21 AM | Link to this

Joe….you are an unadulterated pig. Perhaps if you made comments to your wife about how much you love her and thank her for going through hell to give you 2 beautiful children INSTEAD of silently seething because she is no longer your lustful size 4…she would be more inclined to let the old her shine through. You have earned the second THWOP of the day!

By Fulton

December 1, 2006 11:22 AM | Link to this

LOIS - Marry ME!! How refreshing to find a woman that doesn’t milk the situation or NEED to be catered to, but will graciously accept, if offered. And although most men are kinda stupid, a good one will kindly offer when appropriate. Personally, I think pregnant women have a wonderful ‘glow’ about them and are even more beautiful, since they’re holding the key to a new life.

By singlemom_13years

December 1, 2006 11:24 AM | Link to this

Cliff and Johnny are right. All my married friends do is complain about their husbands. What they don’t do, how they don’t understand, all the while most of them do not work outside the home, and still, they do not have to cut their own grass, wash the car, clean the gutters….and all that man stuff. Then all they do is complain about having sex with their husband. I am like, a $job beats cleaning gutters any day! Men are WAY under rated!!!

By Fulton

December 1, 2006 11:28 AM | Link to this

Hey, Tired Old - Ashleigh’s not kissing up, she’s actually addressing the issue with some thought and clarity. Perhaps that’s why you’re a “Tired Old Mom”, because like typical parents, you just don’t understand…hhhmmm.

By Joe

December 1, 2006 11:30 AM | Link to this

Jesse’s Girl you don’t know me to make the call you made at me. You can read I assume? All she talked about was how she wasn’t going to get fat like so-and-so did and how it was not necessary to gain 80 pounds to have a seven pound baby. My comment was more like if you’re going to sit around and eat a half gallon of ice cream, ah…yeah…you’ll gain the weight. You sound fat and bitter.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 11:34 AM | Link to this

Lets try this…women…have sex with your husband more and I promise, you will both start to overlook the goofy stuff. Men….start being a tad more sensitive to the ladies in your life and everything will improve. Its a cycle…doesn’t matter where you start. Its almost Biblical really…like Genesis. Lots of begets. More sex begets more sensitivity….more sensitivity begets more sex. Everyone wins.

By Richard

December 1, 2006 11:35 AM | Link to this

A bunch of people here need to work more on their marriages and manners!

Jesse’s Girl (9:31) called her husband an arshole and intentially tried to hurt him by grabbing his balls. Then in another post she insults Ashleigh and Joe! What a b!tch.

She has girl in her name - probably just an ugly bitter old hag!

By Rod

December 1, 2006 11:36 AM | Link to this

I’ve heard the old line “I’m eating for two” as well. HOWEVER, during pregnancy a woman should only eat an additional 300 calories per day. That doesn’t mean seconds for gallons of ice cream.

By Jen

December 1, 2006 11:48 AM | Link to this

Man, I LOVED being pregnant. My pregnancy was a charmed one. I never got sick. I only craved watermelon. I only gained a total of 35 pounds (though I’ve gained 60 in the 5 years since…..). And my husband and I got along GREAT. Part of that was because he’s one of those guys who is apparently turned on by pregnant women. Geez, I had more sex while I was pregnant than when we were a new couple. Makes me want to get pregnant again. :)

Jessie’s Girl…are you thirtysomething like me? Because ever since I hit about 28 all I can think about is throwing my husband down and checking out his…uh, mole..yeah, that’s it. Someone told me it’s because I hit that magical age for women….

By NoNonsense

December 1, 2006 11:49 AM | Link to this

My hubby and I have always just said what we were thinking. We both have pretty tough skin so we are able to bounce back quickly most of the time. There has been a view occasions that he made me cry or very angry and a view times when I may have hurt his feelings. But all in all we pretty much speak our mind and my pregnancies did not change that until after my third failed attempt. By the time my first sets of twins were born I had already had 2 miscarriages and 1 stillborn so I became super hypersensitive during that first successful pregnancy. I was so scared that I would lose another baby. If you even looked at me wrong I would start crying so my hubby was his kind and loving self to the second power and everyone else followed his lead. During this last pregnancy which came 4 years later I was back to my old bratty, speak my mind self. Although I had to stop working after the first few months I was a lot tougher this time around when it came to the snide remarks from the hubby. Being that he is genuinely a nice person I could take his remarks anyway they came but others would look at him like “I know he did not just say that to her”. He called me porky, the Pillsbury dough girl, humpty dumpty and anything else that made reference to how big I was getting. I was mostly all belly and looked like I had swallowed a basketball. Because I had to stay put most of the time the only people that I really got see were either at the doctor is office or members of our family. My brother called me Rollie Pollie but that is just him. Anyone else that really knew me never made any rude statements.

By mwh

December 1, 2006 11:50 AM | Link to this

Rod (and others on this whole weight thing) - 22 weeks with number two and yes, you are right on the whole 300 more calories a day thing, but if someone is underweight to begin with then they need to gain a little more then the recommended amount. Just as if they are overweight they do not need as much. Gained 38 with number one and hoping not to go quite that far this time, but i am also 5’10” and normally only 125. So don’t go off on the whole only 300 calories a day. Your body needs extra stuff when you are pregnant…. Nice to hear an expert personal opinion on the weight gain amount though.

Anyways, my husband is normally pretty good when I’m pregnant although he has had some winners. Will need to think to remember some of the better ones - they normally come towards the very end!

By tired old mom

December 1, 2006 12:04 PM | Link to this

To you sweet guys - when you can drop a 10 lb baby call me. Other than that SHUT UP

By Danny

December 1, 2006 12:08 PM | Link to this

Jessies Girl, you nailed it. Men need to be more sensitive to a woman’s feelings, even if we are used to speaking like barbed wire with our buddies and all we do is laugh about it. Women need to learn to look past faults and tendancies so we can all get along. Men have NO excuses for being rude (and women, you have NO idea of the things WE have to deal with). Women have no excuse to be emotional roller-coasters (hormones may play a part, but trust me, it’s been going on since the first baby was birthed). Society has ruled that men must begin to think and act with more feeling and emotional concern. Why does society rule that women have all the excuses (take your pick) to act irrationally and illogically? Yes, I know pregnancy is hard and not all of it is “glowing and wonderful”. Men agree that you drag us along right with you. And women, guess what, men have always thought about, fantasized about and interested in the sexual nature. Must be the way we were wired a few thousand years ago. It’s not going away. And correct me if I’m wrong, with a little communication and getting over hang ups, it can be quite enjoyable. Keep a man smiling and the world is your oyster. We ARE different animals and have different ways of getting to the same place. We BOTH need to figure it out and marraige won’t scare a lot of us so much. Pregancy, marraige, kids and, yes, the sexual part of life was meant to be enjoyable….most of the time. It’s a two way street, you do your part and I do my part. The again, I saw a quote where teenagers is God’s trade off for people that enjoy sex a little too much. HA HA!

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 12:18 PM | Link to this

Joe….my husband was an a*******hole for forgetting my birthday and an even bigger one for assuming my tears were due to PMS! God…you are such a man. But you are indeed entitled to your opinion that your wife has let herself go. Of course, I suppose you need absolutley no improvements. Please…tell us more of what it is like to be you.

Richard….I most certainly did not intend to insult Ashleigh. I simply stated that she most probably has more testosterone coursing through her veins than the average woman. This would likely make it more difficult for her to relate to another woman on an emotional level. Her post was very much a post that a man can relate to. Ugly bitter old hag…..b!tch? Oh, isn’t it fun when the children come out to play? Tell us Richard….is your marriage picture perfect? Are you satisfied with your sex life? Are insensitive to your wife….pregnant or no? We’d be happy to help out…really we would. But we will only oblige after you do a little work on your manners….honestly. Calling into question the manners of others when your mouth is so naughty? THWOP.

By Jonny

December 1, 2006 12:22 PM | Link to this

To be honest, most of Theresa’s columns and the minions that comment on them support my stand on not committing to any one woman. I’m not saying all women are like you girls, there are some real gems out there, but the direction the female gender is traveling (lack of appreciation, martyr complex, complete irrationality) make not committing the most correct choice in my life. So many times I read this column and the comments and think about the men associated with you women and feel sad for them. Then I realize why men cheat.

By tired old mom

December 1, 2006 12:29 PM | Link to this

@jonny - listen mr. studly, do women everywhere a favor and stay single. I certainly can’t stand the thought of you procreating.

By Cole

December 1, 2006 12:32 PM | Link to this

Hmmm…my wife remembered my birthday 3 days after the fact. I didn’t bring it up then or the three days later. I just said “It’s OK. After 40 yrs, they just kind of run together.” I can see you being a little disappointed, but to rag him out?? Maybe a little sarcastic needle to let him know, but for the luvagawd, Jessie’s Girl….LIGHTEN UP!!!!!!!!

By Rick

December 1, 2006 12:36 PM | Link to this

I’m sure that when someone saw Tired Old Lady 2 children he asked if they were twins, because there’s NO way that someone would stay with her long enough to sleep with her twice…..

By NightTrain

December 1, 2006 12:38 PM | Link to this

My first and last remark about my wife’s size, when she was about 5 months along with our first child, was a simple question, “how much more weight do you think you’ll gain?” Hey I’m a fast learner. The question would have been okay if I had of just left out the word “more”.

The best ‘gotcha’ I did was to ask her if the hamburger that I was cooking smelled funny. She stuck her nose near the pan and I did not see her in the kitchen again for about 3 months.

Men and women do look at the world through different filters. I have been married to my wonderful wife for over 25 years. Notice I did not say ‘happy’ years. There have been many times when I wanted, and she deserved an ars whipping that she did not get. Just as I’m sure I have. The secret is to shut up, smile and say yes dear when those situations arise. If the outcome of a disagreement is not going to affect you in 30 days, smile and let her have her way. Then when it something that you feel very strongly about or that will have repercussions, stand your ground. My wife knows that she can do pretty much what she wishes, as can I. But we know when to get the other ones input and when to defer to the other ones wishes. It’s all a game of give and take. However if you take more than you give, you’re going to have a rough time.

By Joe

December 1, 2006 12:42 PM | Link to this

JessesGirl, you seem to need a lot of attention, get if from someone else and just shut up and leave me alone. Go buy your poor husband a gift, the man must be a saint. You’re what is usually referred to as an ex or first wife. I love my wife no matter if she is a size 4 or 14. And no, I am no George Clooney or who ever it is this month women swoon over. We both tease each other about how we BOTH look now. We both laugh and say that out of all the billions of people on the planet, we’re BOTH glad only one other person sees us naked. FYI: I gained 20 lbs with her third pregnancy, does that you feel better. Now run along and wait in your gingerbread house for two lost kids to come and knock on the door.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 12:42 PM | Link to this

See…to man, a forgotten birthday is really no big deal. But any woman would be very hurt if her husband or whatever forgot hers. Asleigh and the scientific research is right….men and women process these things differently. To women, it speaks to thoughfulness and caring consideration. To men it speaks to…well nothing. Its just how we are wired….simple as that. There is nothing to “lighten up” about. Tell you what guys….hold your wife lovingly in your arms making her feel like you really “get it” and then utter something having to do with her PMS. The man is lucky to be alive.

By Jen

December 1, 2006 12:44 PM | Link to this

Eww…..jonny, you’re icky. Or at least you’re pretending to be, which is likely the case.

either way….giving me the creeps

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 12:52 PM | Link to this

Joe..I too am glad your wife is the only one to see you naked….the saint she is.

By Ashleigh

December 1, 2006 12:55 PM | Link to this

Holy crap.. I go to lunch and get insulted. All I did was show that there is an obvious physical brain difference between men and women. I get along with men better because I’ve watched what women say and do to men and it’s just awful. Girls run their mouths too much and I’m not saying that I don’t possess those “girly” traits, but the way some women act is totally appalling. I’m not trying to “kiss up” to anybody, but hell, cut the guys some slack. They try their damnedest to make you happy and it seems a lot of the stuff they do isn’t good enough. Just because they missed a birthday or an anniversary doesn’t mean they don’t care. Ladies, just chill out and try to see things from their point of view. Apparently, it’s man-hating day today in the Theresa blog.

By Richard

December 1, 2006 12:59 PM | Link to this

Well Jesse’s Girl - I do have a wonderful marriage to an incredible woman. We’ve been married for 15 years and have two children (8 and 12) - both of who are well behaived.

Even considering calling your spouse an @ss is beyond belief. My wife and I have NEVER called each other such a thing. Love means caring enough about the other to not do such things. I hope you surely don’t insult him like that in front of your children! That is setting the ultimate bad example.

By Wamuiru

December 1, 2006 01:01 PM | Link to this

What is the deal? Can we just acknowledge the range of experiences people have in the world. I am currently pregnant and working full-time and it is tough. Yes, I am making it, but I in no way want to glorify it. I also do not need to chastise others who may feel the need to whine a little bit more right now. The battle of the sexes debate is just inappropriate. Let’s just stick to best/worst comments.

I don’t have a best worst comment, however, I do despise it when people go in for the belly rub and I have to remove their hand from my breast and send them in the right direction. It’s the worst.

By Lynette

December 1, 2006 01:01 PM | Link to this

Ladies, We forget that men are visually stimulated creatures. Like it or not that is the way it is. Some of us seem forget how we got those darling children to start with. Is it fair for a woman to “let herself go” and expect darling hubby to simply sit down and shut up about it? Would we be as forgiving if he just let something important to us fall by the way side. Isn’t it fraud of a sort to just forget what it was about us that attracted the men to us?

Gentlemen, There is never going to be a safe way to approach a woman about her weight.

By Renee

December 1, 2006 01:02 PM | Link to this

hey tired old mom, why don’t you go back to sleep? Your stupid insults aren’t helping anyone.

By tired old mom

December 1, 2006 01:03 PM | Link to this

Ashleigh………why don’t you just get these guys email and talk to them that way. We know that’s what you want. Then maybe we can have some peace and a little fun. You people could ruin anything. Hookers are less obvious than you.

By Ron

December 1, 2006 01:09 PM | Link to this

Hey tired old mom - you’re the problem here. You’re bitter about your pathetic life and marriage. Instead of picking on others, pick on yourself and clean up your attitude!

By Jen

December 1, 2006 01:09 PM | Link to this

I’ve called my husband an a*…

In fact, just yesterday. He got a cold that gave him a nosebleed and he ruined our bedsheets. So he went out and bought new sheets.

Well, our duvet cover is a dark purple silk (not the slippery kind of silk) that’s more like a raisin color than actual purple.

And he bought sage colored sheets.

I asked him why.

He said, it’s a complementary color.

I said, no, it’s a contrasting color.

He said, no one can tell what color the comforter is anyway.

I said, it’s not a comforter, it’s a duvet cover.

He said, it’s a duvet cover…not a comforter..meemee..meemee..meemee..meeee.

I said, don’t you have a PhD in physiology?

He said, don’t you have a PhD in physiology..meemee..meemee..meemee..meeeee.

I said, if you don’t quit being an a* I’m going to thump you.

He said, ooooo, I’m scared, duvet cover lady is going to thump me with a pillow! Oh, save me.

And I thumped him with a pillow until he took it away from me with his long-gorilla-arms-super-reach and thumped me back. And since I can’t hit him because his arms are so freaking long I resorted to trying to hook his feet.

I think I got knocked out at some point because the next thing I remember is him laughing at me and saying, meemee..meemee..meemee..meeeeee!

men

By Reese

December 1, 2006 01:11 PM | Link to this

Wamuiru, you must have some loooooow hanging boobs!

By Rod

December 1, 2006 01:12 PM | Link to this

Theresa, I’ve gotta say - you’re way off the mark with the sweater situation. He knew it wouldn’t fit you - and might mess up the sweater being stretched out so he told you it wouldn’t fit. What’s the harm?

You’re acting like a guilty woman who’s been packing on weight (getting fat) and doesn’t want anyone to notice. You’re not getting fat - you’re just gaining weight for the pregnancy. Your husband knows this - he doesn’t look at it distastefully as fat - he looks at it as something necessary for his future child. Why do women feel self-conscious about weight gain during pregnancy? The whole world knows you’re supposed to gain the weight.

As far as the traveling comment - I don’t know you, but if you’re getting extra hormonal and snippy during the pregnancy, trust me - it ain’t fun being with a pregnant woman when she feels like griping!

You should be glad your husband thinks he can speak honestly with you - you’re teaching him to hold back and not be truthful with you. Is that where you want your marriage to go?

By Bubba

December 1, 2006 01:13 PM | Link to this

Best / Worst comment? When I see a single (unmarried) woman who’s pregnant, I say “Whore!”

By Brigitte

December 1, 2006 01:13 PM | Link to this

Men need to have babies……

By Ron

December 1, 2006 01:14 PM | Link to this

I feel sorry for Jesse!

By tired but mad old mom

December 1, 2006 01:14 PM | Link to this

Ron just go do to yourself what is physically impossible. With your attitude, that’s your only hope.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 01:15 PM | Link to this

Richard, you are lying through your keyboard to say that after 15 years of marriage you have NEVER called your wife a name…even behind her back. If I can admit that I am being a little extra snippy today…I actually am PMSing:)…..then surely you can admit to a bunch of strangers that you have cussed your wife. PPPUUULLLEEEZZEE. I am not insinuating that you are bad husband….I’m sure you are very supportive. But to say “beyond belief” is a little over the top.

By Jen

December 1, 2006 01:17 PM | Link to this

Lynette,

When my husband married me he knew that one day I would get old. And with it, my body would not look like it did when we first met. Nor like the nubile 20somethings who bounce around in stretchy clothes in Candler Park.

He never said that he’d trade me in for a newer, shinier model.

He said we’d go through life together.

If my bigger bodacious bod was a bother to him…so much so that it made our entire marriage bad then that means he’s not a modern civilized homo sapien.

However, I’d like you to know that while I have gained significant weight in my 10 year marriage my husband looks like an underwear model (well…one who doesn’t shave his chest). Better now than when we got married!

Has he ever complained about my weight? Well, yeah, he says, I wish you’d stop complaining about your weight! Either do something about it or get used to it but shut up about it, for chrissakes! Pass me a chocolate bar and keep that duvet cover away from me!

By Reba

December 1, 2006 01:18 PM | Link to this

To get this topic back on track…the worst comment I received while I was pregnant came from my manager (not the brightest bulb in the box to begin with). During a staff meeting, he stopped mid-sentence to chuckle and announce to the room, “Reba, you look SOOO pregnant today!” I was 7 months along—hello?? I had no idea how to respond to that. Did he think it was a compliment? Why was it necessary in the midst of a business meeting? Luckily no one else was ridiculous enough to chime in.

By NightTrain

December 1, 2006 01:19 PM | Link to this

Just remember when you call your spouse a Bi.ch or an A.., you’re the one who married this person. So what does that say about you?

I have been mad enough to think my wife was being a bi.th but I have not and never will call her one. She has done some really dumb things but I would never call her dumb. Once you have spoken those words, no amount of “I’m sorry” will repair the damage. Every disrespect or harsh word takes a little bite out of your relationship. How many “bites” can a relationship take before it is gone?

Show your spouse the respect they deserve and you will be respected. Treat them like dirt and you will be treated like dirt.

With a 50% divorce rate now days, both men and women need to reevaluate how they treat their spouses. Don’t wait for them to change, you change and then you will see them change.

By Lois

December 1, 2006 01:22 PM | Link to this

Fulton, sorry, but your proposal comes many years too late! I’m already married (21 years and counting) - to the same man who went through those pregnancies with me. Maybe I’ve found the secret to a long and happy marriage - which by the way, is the secret to a happy life in general: keep a sense of humor. We take everything WAY too seriously. Kristi has the idea, too, with the penguin joke. She took a sligtly rude or irritating comment and made a joke out of it. We need to stop being resentful and be more forgiving. I remember one time when I was about 10 and my brothers were teens. We were on vacation with our parents and my parents had a huge argument outside the gates of Busch Gardens. We kids thought Mom and Dad would surely end up in divorce court. But 36 years later, they have been married 53 years now. That following Christmas, in the early 1970’s, my Dad gave my mom a Christmas present - An Anheuser Busch pin and a little pair of Budweiser horses pulling a sleigh. We all laughed until the tears ran down our faces! Now that’s forgiveness - and true love.

By NoNonsense

December 1, 2006 01:22 PM | Link to this

Wamuiru I couldn’t agree more. I don’t read the blog as much as I use to. Other than the fact that I don’t have the time on hand that I did before, it’s mainly because of the judging and belittling that goes on of other peoples experiences and opinions. I just don’t get it. If they are not putting down the moderator they are taking jabs at the commenters. (sigh) But anyway….

I also hated when everyone insisted on touching my belly. When they found out I was having twins is got even worse.

By Ashleigh

December 1, 2006 01:23 PM | Link to this

Wow. I got a hooker insult. Yes, because I side with guys and see it from their eyes, I want to meet and date every single one of them. I’m so glad you got me. My life is easier now while I continue to sleep with a multitude of men and now I don’t have to hide it! THANK YOU. TIRED OLD MOM! Wait, what is that I hear? CHOO CHOO..It’s the Angry Old Hag Express!

Oh please, you call it fun when you have a ton of women ganging up on men, but when a female sides with a guy, you get all upset. Give credit where credit is due and that’s to me because I rule.

By Richard

December 1, 2006 01:29 PM | Link to this

Jesse’s Girl - HOW DARE YOU.

I have never called my wife a name I wouldn’t be willing to be brought up later. We’ve had some disagreements and arguments over the years. BUT - you need to know when not to cross the line. Making insulting comments - like calling the other a hateful name - is not going to do your marriage any good.

I love my wife and she loves me and we have NEVER been less than respectful to each other in our entire marriage. Just because you may have an unstable and unloving marriage doesn’t mean everyone else does.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 01:29 PM | Link to this

I’m sorry…but I just don’t buy it. Some of you are so beyond holier than thou right now…to even pretend that in your deepest, darkest moments of matrimonial bliss you haven’t cussed your spouse in private is such a lie. I have been married…happily…for over 10 years. We have 3 awesome kids and have more blessings than we deserve. But that still doesn’t negate the fact that SOMETIMES we get mad as hell and slip. It does not mean your marriage is about to fall apart…it means you’re human.

By Richard

December 1, 2006 01:31 PM | Link to this

Thank you NightTrain. Course Jesse’s Girl will call you a liar as well.

By NightTrain

December 1, 2006 01:35 PM | Link to this

Jesse’s Girl,

I can honestly say that I have never called my wife a name, even to the guys. I have said that she was being a “little b***” today but never she’s a bi.ch. I have heard my wife tell her friends that I can be “such an a$$ at times”, which I’m sure is true. But that is a far cry from calling me an A$$.

By mwh

December 1, 2006 01:37 PM | Link to this

Thought of a worse thing someone said, but it was from a woman. This lady’s daughter had just had a baby and was also kind of skinny and she looked at me (about seven months along) and said, “oh your breasts didn’t get any bigger either”. The worst part was I was very endowed compared to my normal size!

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 01:39 PM | Link to this

How dare I? Richard…its not like you don’t have it in you sweetie. You have been calling names all morning. And then getting on your soap box when someone else does it.

By Richard

December 1, 2006 01:40 PM | Link to this

Jesse’s Girl - you said (after you again called me a liar): “It does not mean your marriage is about to fall apart…it means you’re human.” - No, it means you have a lack of respect for your partner.

Again, you have no right to call anyone a liar because they show love and respect for their spouse.

By dizzy

December 1, 2006 01:41 PM | Link to this

Richard, Joe, Jonny, Ashleigh, Renee: Why don’t you start your own blog and call it the pathetic losers who have to hijack blogs blog

By Richard

December 1, 2006 01:42 PM | Link to this

Yeah Jesse’s Girl - I don’t love you (how your husband could is beyond comprehension) and you truly are a b!tch - accusing people of lying just because they have good marriages.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 01:42 PM | Link to this

Night Train…..now that I buy.

By Swangirl

December 1, 2006 01:44 PM | Link to this

Wow, lots of hostility on here today. Please don’t smack me for bragging on my husband but I feel I must.

I’m into my fifth month of pregnancy and have to say my husband has yet to say anything unkind or out of left field. He just seems to know that it’s wiser to stay away from certain topics unless I bring it up first.

He knows I’ve had a rough time of it because I had terrible nausea up until a few weeks ago, so he does whatever he can to pitch in with the housework or cooking when I’m feeling bad.

As a result, I try to make sure I thank him for everything he does and that he knows I appreciate all of it. I think the fact that I don’t take it for granted and tell him so makes a big difference. We all like to hear that we’re appreciated…I think.

By Felicia

December 1, 2006 01:44 PM | Link to this

Too bad some of the men who love to visit the MOM blog don’t have more of a sense of humor. Men and women are different and sometimes those differences can be quite annoying. Most of the time, however, those differences add texture and interest and humor to our lives. This site was created for some FUN complaining about life. Nothing in the world wrong with a little of that. To Cliff and the like, if you dislike women so much don’t date, marry or live with one. It’s very easy. There are blow up dolls and prostitutes and self-love alternatives to monogomous sex. I think I speak for women when I say humorless men who dislike us should just go away. We will easily find someone to replace you.

By Jen

December 1, 2006 01:47 PM | Link to this

mwh,

I guess it’s all in how you take that comment.

Me? I went from perky B to obscene DD. This was before my post-pregnancy fattening. I didn’t gain too much during.

But, boy, did THAT part of me grow.

I would trade you anyday……

I don’t care what Pamela Anderson says…those things are no fun to have.

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 01:49 PM | Link to this

Richard always does this on the blogs. I log into the AJC blogs about once or twice a week and invariably he is there stirring up trouble. He either has no life or no job or both. Or if he has a job he is obviously useless because he spends all his time on the “lady blogs” griping about women. Maybe he wants to be a woman and his anger is just misdirected. He certainly loves feminine topics. Perhaps we should discuss our periods and he can chime in on that one. I am sure he has very firm ideas about menstruation and would love to express them.

By Lynette

December 1, 2006 01:49 PM | Link to this

Jen- I never said any thing other than “let yourself go”. The size of your behind or any other part has nothing to do with how you really take care of yourself. The attitude I am talking about is that “I am married I don’t have to worry about that stuff”. It is not about aging it is about caring enough to put your best effort forward for your spouse, and it goes both ways.

My beloved grandmother lived to be 90 and delighted in looking pretty till the end. Yes you can still look pretty and wear double digit sizes.

By Lisa

December 1, 2006 01:50 PM | Link to this

Hey dizzy - why don’t you take a broom stick and go f—- yourself.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 01:51 PM | Link to this

So Richard, Joe…..are you two saints actually saying that those of us who have called our spouses names have doomed marriages? I feel no need to visit the virtues of my marriage on the two of you. Its solid as a rock…I’ll leave it at that. Something tells me however that your wives would tell a slightly different story.

By Ashleigh

December 1, 2006 01:51 PM | Link to this

HAH this gets better and better every minute. People getting called liars, whores, etc. This is better than the soap operas bored housewives watch.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 01:53 PM | Link to this

Stacy…we HAVE been discussing PMS and periods and he still won’t go away. Maybe football will do the trick.

By Charles

December 1, 2006 01:53 PM | Link to this

I have only one comment and absolutely no responses to comments.

Obviously and without question, comments being the evidence, this people has been damned by nature or God. (hallelujah)

By Bubba

December 1, 2006 01:55 PM | Link to this

Best / Worst comment? When I see a single (unmarried) woman who’s pregnant, I say “Slut!”

By NoNonsense

December 1, 2006 01:56 PM | Link to this

For those who don’t know it, marriage is work. Sometimes something like a pregnancy or sickness can add an extra strain to it. If you have to be a little more sensitive during that time then do it, if your relationship is worth saving to you. My husband and I have made some harsh remarks to each other but we were young and immature. Now being older and more experienced we can have civilized disagreements. We make an extra effort to be positive and supporting. As it has been stated earlier men and women are different and once you realize it and learn how to accept it life will get a little easier.

I hope everyone have a good evening.

By Jen

December 1, 2006 01:56 PM | Link to this

Lynette,

My apologies. I misunderstood.

I agree with you here. While I’ve enlarged certain areas of my body I still try to take care of myself . And, it’s not like I’m having a free-for-all a the buffet.

And it’s also more than appearance. It’s interest.

You want him interested in you then you gotta be interested in him.

From what I understand most men (and women for that matter) cheat not because they’re horndogs but because they don’t feel connected to their partner and then develop a connection with someone else. Not an excuse but it’s human.

Keep interested in him! Start a pillow fight!

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 01:57 PM | Link to this

And Rod is the worst! It doesn’t matter what the topic is, he has the answer and is SAINT ROD. The topic is sex- well Rod and his wife were virgin on their wedding nights (that was a funny one). The topic is pregancy, then any woman who has had an accidental pregnancy is a tramp. Rod is probably a very bored, very sexually frustrated young man who couldn’t get laid at a drunked orgy, so he vents by coming on the FEMININE BLOGS and putting down women. Jealous Rod? And I bet Rod’s rod is more like a gherkin.

By meredith

December 1, 2006 01:57 PM | Link to this

I had on a red shirt and a man at the gas station said I looked like a red tomatoe. Another man corrected him and said, ‘no you look like a big red sexy apple!’

By Richard

December 1, 2006 01:59 PM | Link to this

Jesse’s Girl - why are you double entering as Stacy now? Trying to make it look like someone agrees with you? (it fairly obvious, same grammar and typographical errors).

Again, I didn’t say your marriage was doomed - just not as strong as it could be. And yes - this is a fact - if you are calling your spouse those names of disrespect in front of your children, it affects their respect for both of you and gives them a lowered expectation of marriage. You can ask any counselor and they will confirm it.

By Swangirl

December 1, 2006 02:01 PM | Link to this

Hey Jesse’s Girl, please back off. My husband and I have never insulted each other by calling names: and no, I’m not lying. I have a great marriage and my husband and I believe that includes mutual respect. No name calling, ever.

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 02:02 PM | Link to this

To all the men on this blog- behold the Vagina!! It is all powerful and you can’t avoid it! You can’t even waste time on the computer without being magically drawn to the Lady-Sphere to discuss lady parts and female topics. You gripe about women but you are hooked on us like crack! Don’t fight it.

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 02:03 PM | Link to this

Guys are such a55es - they’re not worth the trouble! If you want a friend, get a girl. If you want a confidant, get a girl. If you want a lover, get a girl.

5 years ago I got divorced and have been in a loving lesbian relationship for 3 years with my best friend. It’s much better being with another woman.

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 02:04 PM | Link to this

Richard, I am laughing. I am not Jessies Girl. It may come as a shock to you but there is more than one woman out there who is bothered by you.

By Lois

December 1, 2006 02:06 PM | Link to this

okay, things are getting out of hand in here!

Richard - calm down.

Jesse’s Girl - my husband and I don’t insult each other either. Not only is it possible, it’s the way I want my marriage to be. So don’t call others liars.

Stacy - you’re acting like a real jerk.

Bubba - cute, but I doubt you actually say that stuff.

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 02:06 PM | Link to this

Though there is another Stacy on this blog. I am her straight counterpart. Welcome sister!

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 02:10 PM | Link to this

More power to ya’ Stacy. But no offense, either you like eating sushi or you don’t.

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 02:12 PM | Link to this

Who said anything about calling names in front of the kids? The only time they have ever heard a “bad” word from me is when I fell down the stairs and broke my wrist..I screamed damnit. Of course The Boy said it with wild abandon after that. I do however think that if you slip and do fight in front of them that it is equally important that you apologize in front of them. Lets be friends Richard….I am not against you….I just think when you fall off that horse, its going to hurt.

By Jen

December 1, 2006 02:12 PM | Link to this

My husband and make a point to insult each other. I’d be worried he didn’t love me anymore if he stopped. The only compliment I’ll accept from him concerns my cooking. I am a damn fine cook!

By JAZMEN

December 1, 2006 02:12 PM | Link to this

THATS FUNNY BUT REALY DID HE SAY THAT

By Lulu

December 1, 2006 02:13 PM | Link to this

On the topic:

I was walking with my older child while pregnant with the next child. A man said very loudly to me: “Well, I guess we all know who you’ve been sleeping with.”

He was referring to the obvious biracial look of the older child.

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 02:13 PM | Link to this

Lois, please cram it.

By Rod

December 1, 2006 02:15 PM | Link to this

Stacy - I see for some reason you insulted me out of the blue on here. For what? You said (1:57) that I come on here and put down women? EXACTLY WHERE?

I made two blog comments on here - (1) mentioning the needed 300 additional calories per day a pregnant woman needs and (2) telling Theresa that her husband is being honest with her (which most married people like) and he knows she’s not getting fat but going through necessary stages of pregnancy.

Where’s the insults? Huh? Huh? Huh?

You made a reference to a post I made a few weeks ago (I’m so flattered I made a difference if your life) - about my wife and I were both virgins when we married. We met at church and have strong faiths. If you believe in having sex with whoever you want - then go ahead. We don’t feel that way and were virgins when we married. Again - why is that something you need to insult?

Why the personal attack? I try my best to live a positive, faithful, Christian lifestyle and you want to attack me? For what?

By Jesse's Girl

December 1, 2006 02:17 PM | Link to this

Lois…if you will actually read…you will see that the rub lies in some of you saying that you have never even cussed your spouses in private. THAT is what I don’t buy. Yes, I do think that it is wholy unrealistic to go through a decades long marriage and never have that happen.

By Jessica

December 1, 2006 02:18 PM | Link to this

You men all need to get over yourselves. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for 4 years, and have been through a lot. We would give anything to be able to get pregnant, and I know for a fact once I get pregnant my husband will respect me for carrying his child, not whining about how I have gotten fat (Mr. My wife is not a size 4 anymore). Men, grow up and realize your wives are carrying your child, which is an amazing gift!!

By The REAL Swangirl

December 1, 2006 02:18 PM | Link to this

Jesse’s Girl, that was someone posing as me so please ignore the comment from the impostor. Seems to be going around today.

By RxDawg

December 1, 2006 02:19 PM | Link to this

Wow, there are some really hatefull people on this blog (I usually look at sports blogs!) . I dont think I need to point them out.

By Lois

December 1, 2006 02:20 PM | Link to this

Stacy - you’re being quite a jerk! Please shut up so we can have an enjoyable blog!

By Jen

December 1, 2006 02:21 PM | Link to this

I curse in front my kid all the time.

Just this morning I told him if he didn’t stop whining about taking off his Superman pajamas and getting into his school clothes I was going to beat the crap outta him.

Of course, I’ve never beat him, never will. I just like to tell him I will.

His response, “Mom, crap is a bad word!”

I had to sit in the corner facing the wall while he ate breakfast.

At least he told me it was “..a damn fine breakfast, Mommy!”

By Genie

December 1, 2006 02:21 PM | Link to this

Haven’t you guys figured out yet that Jessie’s Girl is an authority on everything? If you don’t believe it, just ask her.

By Richard

December 1, 2006 02:23 PM | Link to this

Hey Jessica - where have the men been insulting women for “getting fat” on here? Where? We know women get larger for the pregnancy. I didn’t see any men calling women fat on here for being pregnant!

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 02:25 PM | Link to this

Aww! RxDog wants us to believe and really feels the need to point out that he usually visits the sports blogs. How cute! Read: I am a man’s man but today I accidentally found myself here. Right! Admit it Dog, you love the vagina dialogues and long to participate. It’s okay. You don’t have to be a tough guy here. We love our vag-addict boys. Pull up a chair, light up a tampon and get ready to rumble (I thought a sports boy would like that last part)

By Godless

December 1, 2006 02:26 PM | Link to this

“I try my best to live a positive, faithful, Christian lifestyle and you want to attack me?”

You know what? These are all independent adjectives..

I try my best to live a positive, faithful, atheistic, humanist lifestyle.

Christian =/= automatic goodness

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 02:28 PM | Link to this

Rod, I have seen you call women on these blogs sluts, tramps, whores, etc.. How very Christian of you. Give me a break! You are a bully hiding behind the Bible.

By Jesse

December 1, 2006 02:28 PM | Link to this

My wife’s a b1tch and I don’t care who knows it!

By Britt

December 1, 2006 02:33 PM | Link to this

I really think that there is no way to say a good thing to a pregnant woman. Just last week I met a friend of mine’s pregnant wife. She could be no more than a few inches over 5 feet tall and pre-pregnancy must have been fairly skinny. All in all, a small girl. When they told me that she was due in a month I was shocked as she looked barely 5 months pregnant. Thinking that she would feel complemented, I told her that she simply didn’t look that far along. Apparently that set off a weeks worth of crying and doctor visits to assure her that she was big enough. How was I supposed to know that?????

Moral to the story kids, never say anything at all, ever to a pregnant woman. There is no winning. Restrict topics to due date, boy or girl, possible names and leave it at that.

As for the mental processes between men and women, things are very different indeed. There is one thing that I do need to say. LISTEN UP LADIES!! This is important. When men make a statement, we do NOT have a subtext in mind. Meaning, what we’ve said is what we meant. We don’t “hint”. We aren’t very good at it, so most of us gave up trying a very long time ago. Conversationally, men are baseball bats where as women are scalpels. Both equally effective, but one is somewhat less delicate. I think we can all agree that talking to a pregnant woman is as delicate an operation as can be found in modern society. I do fear the day that my lovely wife gets pregnant as I will have absolutely no clue how to safely talk to her for nine months.

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 02:35 PM | Link to this

Lois, do you really think this is an enjoyable blog? It is always a bunch of angry ranting and you are usually at the forefront. If you think I am a jerk, then fine, you have a right to your opinion, but how you think I am the only jerk here today is laughable. This is a damn jerk convention!

By Rod

December 1, 2006 02:35 PM | Link to this

Stacy, what are you talking about? A woman who has sex each night of the week with a different man to me is a slut - same for a man who has sex with a different woman each night of the week: he’s a slut too.

I never called pregnant women sluts or whores or whatever - unless they fit the above criteria.

What’s your problem?

By Jo

December 1, 2006 02:40 PM | Link to this

Oh & how about the time some man said to me “I bet you’re really excited about your due date coming up so soon!” Uh, I WASN’T EVEN PREGNANT!

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 02:43 PM | Link to this

Geez, Rod! I am not talking about today, I am referring to numerous past topics on this blog on which you have spouted numerous JUDGEMENT, UNCHRISTIAN insults at people you don’t even know. I remember so don’t try to deny it.

By Richard

December 1, 2006 02:44 PM | Link to this

Britt - it doesn’t end at 9 months!! Wait until she starts trying to take off the weight! No matter how much she takes off, sooner or later she’ll ask you: Do I need to take off more?

Yeah, good luck answering that one!

Don’t worry Rod - Stacy and Jesse’s Girl are both going postal today.

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 02:44 PM | Link to this

If a55holes could fly, this place would be an airport!

By He Man

December 1, 2006 02:46 PM | Link to this

I never open doors for pregnant sows, nor do I accommodate them in any way. If there is anything more disgusting on the face of the earth than a knocked-up broad, I have yet to see it. Hitler’s mommy should have been kicked in the belly, and six million Jews would have been saved.

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 02:47 PM | Link to this

Rod is probably one of those guys who likes to go to secular social events and bore people with stories about his “close, personal relationship with God.” Snore!

By Britt

December 1, 2006 02:51 PM | Link to this

Maybe I’ll just do what I do now, go work out with her. Do my best to lose weight and set the example. If I can’t motivate myself, I have no right trying to motivate her. Thus, if I plan on “letting myself go” I’d better plan on her doing likewise. I’m working very hard right now to take off the weight I put on in college, and it is working, albeit slowly. I expect that she will put on some weight during the pregnancy, as will I. Then I guess I’ll just have to continue motivating myself and helping to motivate her.

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 02:52 PM | Link to this

Oh, He Man! How you do talk! That was hilarious! Tell another one! By the way, don’t try to overcompensate too much, if you know what I mean.

By Britt

December 1, 2006 02:55 PM | Link to this

He Man…… Wow. And all these years I had thought neanderthals were extinct. You proved me wrong, though. Here’s a thought. Sell yourself to Fernbank as an exibit in the anthropological wing. I don’t think they’ve seen your type in at least 10,000 years.

By Stacy

December 1, 2006 02:56 PM | Link to this

He Man, I think the Perez Hilton site is more up your alley. You should check it out.

By Jessica

December 1, 2006 02:59 PM | Link to this

uh, Richard, let me quote Joe, as he was complaining that his wife is not the size 4 she used to be. And Joe states, “…I just let it go, like she did her figure”. You know what, if a man (or woman for that matter) is going to make insensitive remarks to a pregnant woman, then I will tell him/her like I tell my 1st grade students. “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything nice at all”. Again, I would give anything to be able to get pregnant, and when I do, I dare someone to be rude to me.

By Lulu

December 1, 2006 03:01 PM | Link to this

I’m so very disappointed that most of you ignore the substantive comments on the blog.

By Lulu

December 1, 2006 03:04 PM | Link to this

I’m so very disappointed that most of you ignore the substantive comments on the blog.

By Lulu

December 1, 2006 03:04 PM | Link to this

I’m so very disappointed that most of you ignore the substantive comments on the blog.

By Joe

December 1, 2006 03:06 PM | Link to this

Would be nice if Jessesgirls mother would have never had kids. Can we go back and correct it, change time?

By destiny

December 1, 2006 03:09 PM | Link to this

Since you act like this to total strangers, most assuredly you act like this at home. Theresa, please put a warning on your blog “explicit content - for mature adults only”

By JW

December 1, 2006 03:09 PM | Link to this

Jesse’s Girl, your husband probably forgot your birthday for two reasons: One,he is stuck with you and he does not even LIKE you, who would? Two: it’s his way of FORGETTING you ever lived. Merry Christmas.

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 03:10 PM | Link to this

Lulu, girl, this blog went in the toilet about a year ago. If you think talking to us like a dried up old school marm is going to help then you haven’t been paying attention.

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 03:13 PM | Link to this

Destiny, wake up!! It is very easy to use these blogs as a faceless way to vent frustrations. There are no consequences because no on really knows who you are and vice versa. I highly doubt anyone on this blog acts like this in person and that is the good and the bad. The bad are never as bad as they seem here and the good are never as holy as they try to come off here. You are crazy if you think this is how people really are.

By destiny

December 1, 2006 03:14 PM | Link to this

Joe and the rest of you - Jesse’s girl has been way more gracious to you than I would have. Most of us enjoy reading her comments - she has a talent for writing and humor. If picking on her, and your pitiful attempt at berating her is all you have to do, you are pathetic.

By virginia girl

December 1, 2006 03:17 PM | Link to this

My husband wins the prize for the worst comment to make to a post-partum Mom. I had delivered my first child and had just come home. Just my luck, I developed a raging breast infection - a headache to end all headaches, enlarged breasts, and a fever of 104. In those days, the doctors did not prescribe any medication — just Tylenol and warm showers. Anyway, as I was sitting in bed in all my misery, my husband approached with a load of laundry, fresh from the dryer. He said, “Here, you’re not doing anything. You can fold my socks.” To this day, he denies that he said and did any such thing!

By JW

December 1, 2006 03:22 PM | Link to this

The worse thing ever said to a pregnant woman was when Jesse’s Girls mother found out she was pregnant and the doctor told her she was going to have Jesse’s Girl as a child. And Destiny…you’re not worth the ink, nevermind, you’re too easy of a target to go after.

By Renee

December 1, 2006 03:27 PM | Link to this

So Jessica, you cite one example and blame all men? What a horrible teacher you must be!

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 03:29 PM | Link to this

JW, that one at Jesse was very, very lame. You need to go back to the drawing board on that one. Try again, you can do better…well, you can’t do worse.

By JB

December 1, 2006 03:30 PM | Link to this

I weigh 105 pounds and someone asked me if I was pregnant because I had on one of those baby-doll shirts. It’s really no one’s business anyway so don’t ask!

By Jack

December 1, 2006 03:31 PM | Link to this

I am a 37yr old man. I have been blessed to have a awesome wife. She is a great wife and a great mother to our kids. We have 2 very beautiful daughters 1yr old and 2yr old. I had 5 older sisters and was the only boy. First, men need to learn to love and respect their wife or girl friend. Men need to also realize that its most likely that women are not going to be that super hot tight size 4 after giving them a awesome gift like a child. Men also need to understand that women alot of times loose their awesome hot body more and more as they age. When my wife was pregnant I always told her that she was still smoking hot and oh man dont get naked because it would be on. However, the unbalanced hormone rages she would have was really difficult to handel. She would go from incredibly happy to crying her eyes out. Then would go from an angel to a raging devil. Men, do not try to be a loving, caring, “come her baby let me hug you and kiss you when she is in the devil stage or crying stage because then it becomes the apocalypse. RUN… go take a drive. Men, be sympathetic because I gaurantee that if you were experiencing the pain, hormone changes and stretching of the body, you would be a bigger whiner than they are. Men cherish the wife you have because you are not perfect either. The tongue can be more deadly than a knife and women remember every word you say to her for LIFE. Me and my wife are christians, yes for those that that word offends, sorry thats what we are. Believe me, the biggest help you will recieve during pregnancy and through out your entire marriage will come from Jesus Christ. A couple that preys together stays together, for the most part.

By Old mom

December 1, 2006 03:32 PM | Link to this

I was so huge that I looked like I swalloed a watermelon (sideways). One day I was clothes shopping with my husband (for him), and the salesman actually followed me around with a rolling chair. I think he was afraid I would fall over and not be able to get back up!!

By JW

December 1, 2006 03:45 PM | Link to this

Madge the Hag

By Danielle

December 1, 2006 03:47 PM | Link to this

A few years ago I went back to my hometown and decided to visit to where I used to work. My old boss was still there and said VERY LOUDLY, “Are you pregnant? You have that glow!” I wanted to melt away. I wasn’t and there were people who knew my parents standing in line and they all just stared at me. I wasn’t married and didn’t have a boyfriend. Well, apparently, one of those people in line called my mother and then I came home to my mother crying about it and I had to clear it all up… what a mess!

By Britt

December 1, 2006 03:47 PM | Link to this

Old Mom, I think that salesman was actually doing his best to be helpful in the only way he knew how. Note to all very, very pregnant women, you scare everyone around you. We are all worried that you are going to go into labor at any moment and no one wants the responsibility of taking care of you. Now before the collective wrath of this blog falls down on my head, let me clarify. I’m not, repeat not, saying that you shouldn’t go anywhere when you are 9 months pregnant (unless your doctor says otherwise), but don’t expect us not to be a little worried for you. Most of us are not trained obstetricians and cannot safely deliver a baby, so we don’t want to have to learn on the fly.

By seeking divine healing for everyone

December 1, 2006 03:54 PM | Link to this

Thank you Lord for not letting me be jessy, and, Lord, watch over jessy and jessy’s kids and jessy’s house and jessy’s stuff, cause jessy’s girl sits on her butt everyday wearing out her “kiss my grits” act on AJC blogs. Somewhere along the way Lord, someone gave her a thesaurus and told her she was clever and witty and even eclectic, forgive those people Lord And Lord please help the misguided, brain dead mombie who refered to Jessies girl as gracious, talented and humerous. She knows not what she says. Now, can you do something about the weather? Its December for your sake and Im running the AC over here. Amen.

By Madge the Vag

December 1, 2006 03:55 PM | Link to this

No, No, No, JW. Hag does not rhyme with Madge. See Vag is short for vagina, so vag rhymes with Madge. You are kind of slow so I will let you try, yet again.

By JW

December 1, 2006 04:07 PM | Link to this

Just the thought of your vagina is enough to make a dog sick. I’m sure a nuclear waste dump is less toxic. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

By Jack

December 1, 2006 04:15 PM | Link to this

My wife is so hot, 2 kids later 1 and 2 yrs old, she is 5’ 6” and 135 pounds. Pregnant, not pregnant, size 4 or size 10 she is still a hottie. Every morning I thank God for her and the awesome beautiful 2 daughters that we have. Every morning I give her a soft kiss on her cheek so I dont wake her up, I tape a love note to her on the bathroom mirror and then all day long I think about her and long for the day to come to an end so I can go home, hold her in my arms and tell her how much I love her and how lucky I am to be married to her. I take rose petals after the kids are asleep and make a rose petal track from the den to the bathroom and then to the bedroom, I run a hot bubble bath for her in a candel lit bathroom, bring a glass of wine to her in the bathroom, take a bubble bath with her, then I dry her off, pick her up and lie her on the bed and then make intimate love to her. Then some nights I put a fire in the fireplace, light candels, lay in front of the fire and candel lit room with some wine, we hug, kiss and talk until the wee hours of the morning, then I fall asleep in her arms then I wake up, make her breakfast and have her sit in my lap as we eat breakfast and then we spend an awesome day together. Now men, thats how you treat a wife or girl friend.

By Joe

December 1, 2006 04:23 PM | Link to this

I will sign off by saying I am going home to the most wonderful and beautiful wife and mother in the world and I thank God I have her to go home to. All men should be so lucky, but it was me who won the lottery!

By Ed

December 1, 2006 04:26 PM | Link to this

If my wife had the body that my girlfreind has I would buy her something else besides some good sturdy thick soled work shoes for Christmas, but she doesn’t so she should be glad she is getting some good work shoes for Christmas.

By Jane

December 1, 2006 04:29 PM | Link to this

I am four months pregnant and normally a very cool person. My husband keeps commenting on how big certain body parts are getting and I feel like attacking him with an upper cut to the esophagus. Men, please think twice before you open your mouths and utter insensitive comments to your pregnant women.

By eye roll

December 1, 2006 05:13 PM | Link to this

Worst thing? 8.5 months pregnant married for 9.5 months. NEVER cheated or gave any signs of cheating. Wouldn’t live with or sleep with him until we are married. He wakes up one morning and says “are you sure it is mine?” no this is not fiction….i think that is the day i began to hate him. * I told him to get dressed we were going to the doctor for a paternity test.*

By MsYvone

December 1, 2006 05:53 PM | Link to this

Right before I became pregnant, I was on weight watchers and it wasn’t a big secret at work. At three months I announced that I was, in fact, pregnant. At about 5 months pregnant, one of my very sweet, but very clueless (when it comes to women) Co-workers, Scott, confessed to me that he had forgotten that I was pregnant, but had remembered I was on weight watchers. He said he had spotted me the other day and thought to himself, “MAN, I bet SHE’s unhappy with the way THAT’s going!” Then he said, he remembered later that I was pregnant.

It’s one thing to think it, but what makes him think i want to HEAR that? …. Then he added, “Man, you’re gonna be HUGE!”

Thanks. Thanks Alot, Scott.

By A mom

December 1, 2006 08:47 PM | Link to this

My worst comment I received was actually from my ob doctor. I was originally built like an athelete, very fit, excellent shape, then got preg with husband. I knew I was preg when I was doing my daily run and couldn’t cause I felt I was about to faint, and just felt really bad all of the sudden, so I couldn’t get away with excercising strenuously or eating very little like I was used to, because I got very sick if I ate that way when preg. My body just wouldn’t put up with that. For first trimester, all I could eat was pimento cheese sandwiches, and only gained a little,healthy amount. Couldn’t even tell I gained anything. Then around second trimester, I got absolutely starving. I ate as little as I could get away with without starving to death, still excercised, and still gained 60lbs by the end, despite my best efforts, I asked the doctor, what could I do, I was always starving to death, and I had no idea if this was safe or normal. My doctor asked what I ate, I mentioned the normal stuff, wheat bread, and he said “Do you eat it by the loaf?” I couldn’t believe what I just heard and I wanted to strangle the -astard. And he was the one who was supposed to give advice and be helpful.

By Jesse's Girl

December 4, 2006 06:37 AM | Link to this

Wow! I go away for the weekend and come back to see all the loving comments left by Joe and Richard and their respective personalities. Thank them all for me…won’t you? Maturity and its best.

By Disgruntled

December 4, 2006 07:47 AM | Link to this

Jack, you are one lucky guy. I would love to be in your shoes. My wife won’t drink wine because she thinks God has a problem with it. She’s also too fugging fat to sit on my lap. My bedroom is a bore because she’s always got to analyze if God approves of what I ask her to do. I can’t wait until my last kid, a high school senior leaves home for college so I can dump her fat azz.

By Disgruntled

December 4, 2006 08:23 AM | Link to this

Jesse’s Girl, looks like you really took a beating on here, huh? But I know where you’re coming from. I’ve been married 31 years and I’ve called my wife everything under the sun. And she’s called me names too. She’s a lazy b*tch. She don’t cook, don’t clean and don’t fugg. The only time she attempts to cook something is when there’s a family gathering at her mother’s house. And when she’s there she tries to impress everyone by washing the dishes. At home, she raises hell while washing dishes, if she washes them. She changes the linen on the bed maybe once every 3 months, but that’s ok since nobody’s screwing on it.

By southernmommy

December 4, 2006 11:09 AM | Link to this

WOW! Ok guys, you all hate your fat wives! We get it. And ladies all your hubby’s are lazy jerks. No wonder the divorce rate is sooooo high.

My hubby nick named me “Tons of Fun” when I was pregnant. I thought it was hilarious. I am not dilusional about the way my pregnant body looked. Other than some good natured name calling (which is the norm in our house anyway) he was wonderful. In fact he is sweeter to me when I am pregnant.

The only time he really hurt my feelings was after number 2 was born. I was depressed because our 1st was only 19 months old and I had a new unplanned baby on my hands. I REALLY let myself go. He finally called me out about it. But it was the push I needed. After I cussed him out and threw a few things at him, I took his Credit Card and went to the hair dressers, shopping, manicure, trainer, and had a girls night out,etc. Ya’ know he paid for that comment in more ways than one.

By catlady

December 4, 2006 03:07 PM | Link to this

My former mother-in-law said, when talking to my mother about the sex of our expected baby, “Well, IF Mike is the father, it will be a girl.” My mother did not take the IF very well, although I really don’t think my mother in law was questioning my virtue.

By Disgruntled

December 4, 2006 04:37 PM | Link to this

LOL Catlady, your former mother-in-law sounds about as nutty as my current mother-in-law.

By Trudy

December 5, 2006 12:04 PM | Link to this

I have two older sisters who have always rivaled each other. When the elder was pregnant with child number two my other sister said to her “Your baby is going to be ugly just like your mother in law”! The HORROR!!!

By geese some ppl have problems

December 14, 2006 10:45 AM | Link to this

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