MOMania

By RissaMom

September 26, 2006 08:19 AM | Link to this

I work for a local county government. I love my job and my boss, however the overall work environment isn’t family-friendly. There is no maternity leave for female employees (we have to cobble our maternity leave through sick or annual leave) or take unpaid leave via FMLA. Although we live and work in one of the most congested area in metro Atlanta, we no longer offer telecommuting as an option. Most supervisors realize that us working moms have to take time off when our children are sick (as a divorced, working single mother with no immediate family around here)but i stay available via phone and email. and yet, sometimes i feel that it is unappreciated. i love what i do and is avialble often after hours to respond to company needs yet the feeling is often unreciprocated. it is quite frustrating.

By RissaMom

September 26, 2006 08:21 AM | Link to this

I work for a local county government. I love my job and my boss, however the overall work environment isn’t family-friendly. There is no maternity leave for female employees (we have to cobble our maternity leave through sick or annual leave) or take unpaid leave via FMLA. Although we live and work in one of the most congested area in metro Atlanta, we no longer offer telecommuting as an option. Most supervisors realize that us working moms have to take time off when our children are sick (as a divorced, working single mother with no immediate family around here)but i stay available via phone and email. and yet, sometimes i feel that it is unappreciated. i love what i do and is avialble often after hours to respond to company needs yet the feeling is often unreciprocated. it is quite frustrating.

By RissaMom

September 26, 2006 08:22 AM | Link to this

I work for a local county government. I love my job and my boss, however the overall work environment isn’t family-friendly. There is no maternity leave for female employees (we have to cobble our maternity leave through sick or annual leave) or take unpaid leave via FMLA. Although we live and work in one of the most congested area in metro Atlanta, we no longer offer telecommuting as an option. Most supervisors realize that us working moms have to take time off when our children are sick (as a divorced, working single mother with no immediate family around here)but i stay available via phone and email. and yet, sometimes i feel that it is unappreciated. i love what i do and is avialble often after hours to respond to company needs yet the feeling is often unreciprocated. it is quite frustrating.

By Brian Curtis

September 26, 2006 08:26 AM | Link to this

Thankfully, NO, My company is not “mother friendly”… and a good thing, too. I’ve got plenty to do without covering for someone else’s job too.

Now, if you want a realistic accommodation of people’s work/life demands, you could push for a WORKER-friendly company: one that treats all employees equally and recognizes that we ALL have obligations and responsibilities outside the office. But a “mother-friendly” company? Heck no, what a terrible idea.

Interesting side note that “we need women to have babies.” Really? I hadn’t noticed that we were running out of people on this little planet of ours. And I could’ve sworn that there are still a few kids in foster homes and orphanages… so where is this dreadful dearth of babies we’re hearing about?

By stayinvolved

September 26, 2006 08:43 AM | Link to this

Fortunately my position is one that is mother friendly which means that my boss is flexible so I can work from home and work in the middle of the night etc. to make sure I get the work done. My employer ends up getting quite a few extra hours from me than if I were tied to my desk. And I can pick my child up from school, go on field trips, have lunch with him etc. Not every position can be worked from home so they offer flex schedules such as 4 day weeks/9 hour days with every other Fri. off. I also do not have maternity leave but am given 3 wks sick & 3 wks vacation a year so that works for me.

By NoKidz

September 26, 2006 08:53 AM | Link to this

I’m with Brian on the worker-friendly concept; I don’t have children to care for, but I do have aging parents. Co-workers expect me to cover for them when their kid is sick, but if I need time off for any personal reason, God forbid. They won’t cover for me. I have been tapped to work weekends and holidays because I “don’t have a family”. The examples are endless.

More companies should institute flextime, there’s very little reason not to do that, except that people in charge are generally men, who rely on women to take care of family responsibilities. Why the heck we all have to fight traffic and sit in the same place from 9-5 like little drones escapes me.

By Not A Mom

September 26, 2006 08:56 AM | Link to this

I am a woman who chose not to have children, but I do have a life outside of the office. Why should mothers get extra flexibility in their jobs that I don’t? Personally I feel that ALL employees should have some flexibility in their hours, no matter what their family situation may be. We all have things we need to do outside of work. Not just moms.

By stayinvolved

September 26, 2006 09:07 AM | Link to this

At my company your schedule and flexibility with hours is not determined by your gender but by your position and business needs.

Sorry NoKidz, sounds like you work with some terribly selfish people. I recently had to balance work, motherhood and caring for a dying parent. Could not have done it without the help and support of my coworkers.

By eric martin

September 26, 2006 09:16 AM | Link to this

clearly home depot is not mom friendly, waking my wife up at 5:30 am today was not cool.

September 26, 2006

Deborah Platt Majoras Federal Trade Commission 600 Pennsylvania Avenue, N.W. Washington, DC 20580

Robert Hardelli 2455 Paces Ferry Road NW Atlanta, GA 30339 Sent via Fax 770-431-2685

Re: Complaint on Home Depot for calling us at 5:33 am on 9/26/06

At 5:33 am (eastern time) on September 26, 2006, we received a call at our home phone number (770-667-0505) from Home Depot (number 770-831-5005) asking for Donald. I have a serious problem with this.

First, our number is registered with National Do Not Call Registry and we pay a fee with Bell South to block any solicitation. I thought there were rules/laws against a business calling a number that was registered with the FTC Do Not Call Registry.

Second, the fact that anyone would call a residential number at 5:30 am is completely out of line. We have a 2 and 5 year old and value what little sleep we get.

Third, the person the Home Depot is unknown. We do not know a “Donald” and have no idea why Home Depot would be calling us. Matter of fact, we do not even shop at Home Depot because of their poor service and prefer Lowes.

I am requesting that immediate action be taken by both the FTC and Home Depot to resolve what I would classify as harassing tactics and a complete miss use of phone solicitation.

Eric Martin

By Pat Weaver

September 26, 2006 09:18 AM | Link to this

Re Brian’s rant: Get real. It would be lovely, in a perfect world, if men felt the need to equally share responsibility for sick kids, kids’ dental appointments, school conferences and other endless kid-related stuff that requires moms to take off time from the workplace. Very few do. But most don’t - and the men who run corporate America continue to assume it’s mom’s job to cover this ground, and thus, it remains her de facto responsibility. Until that changes, women will always have to take more time out of the office than their male counterparts. If Brian’s had to occasionally “cover” for female co-workers who were trying to keep their families afloat, well boo hoo. There may indeed, be some women who may abuse the dubious “privilege” of getting to juggle work and family and enjoy the crazed pressure cooker that lifestyle creates. They are a small minority.

And when you consider things like getting more for doing the same work, being top-of-mind for raises and promotions, and having no “glass ceiling,” males do get a few perks to compensate them for the trials they must endure when Employee Jane must run take little Johnny to the pediatrician - especially those dads who have absolutely no intention of being the one who has to take their own “little Johnnys” to such appointments.

As for not needing babies - true, the third world - and our own poverty class - is popping out babies with gusto. But do you really think these teaming hordes will be the ones who create the next wave of new technologies, find cures for society’s ills, or even just have the means to consume the new high-end products of the future? No - those will be the children of the educated class…most of whom will, of necessity, come from families where moms must work.

When men and women share as equally as possible in child-related responsibilities (because women conceive and give birth, nature has ensured the load can never be truly “equal”) - then I’ll agree - companies should strive for a truly “worker friendly” environment where we all take care of our children. Unfortunately, until then, giving worn-out moms a break or two is more than most are willing to do.

By lovelyliz

September 26, 2006 09:21 AM | Link to this

I worked for a company that was parent friendly, but was so at the expense of the singles.

Singles were always the first ones asked to work late. For company events, the parents were given extra time off and the singles remained behind. Parents were allowed to work flexible hours while the others had a more rigid schedule. Clearly the personal life of singles just didn’t matter as much.

In a conversation I had with some coworker about this subject, the answer was for me to get married and have kids.

I wish this had been an isolated incident, but unfortunately it was not.

I would like to see companies have more flexibility period, but it should never come for one group of workers at the expense of another.

By southernmommy

September 26, 2006 09:23 AM | Link to this

I think it just depends on your job and where you work. I took my time finding a job. I was part time after only two weeks of maternity leave but was able to bring the baby with me. I am able to leave when I have a sick child (those are my sick days) and can even bring them to the office depending on the symptoms. Every one in my office has kids but I am the only woman. The guys here appreciate what I do and are very willing to work with me. We have a family first policy here as long as it is not abused. By the end of 2008 I will be opening my own store and we too will have a family first policy.

In todays world it has become almost necesary to have to incomes. But our children shouldn’t suffer for it. I do not think it should be gender based though as there are more and more households with “reverse roles” where mom is the “bread winner” and dad works for “a little extra”.

By NoKidz

September 26, 2006 09:28 AM | Link to this

I’m not so sure my co-workers are selfish, just self absorbed in their kids.

That isn’t such a bad thing in itself; people who have children and then don’t instinctively place them at the center of the universe are sick, sick people. They don’t need to have children in the first place, and such a worldview is both necessary and normal. And wonderful to see!

The problem arises when parents fail to realize that their parenting instinct will inevitably clash with the outer world, and refuse to make sacrifices (i.e. working in a more flexible job, or not working, or God forbid, getting the other parent to help raise the kid) that seem to be inherent with having children. That’s when other people get screwed over.

By babygirl

September 26, 2006 09:33 AM | Link to this

I work for bosses that are compassionate about personal situations, not just children. Not only that, in time of need, regardless of how you view someone else, everyone is there to help you, just like family, or more than family in some cases.

By stayinvolved

September 26, 2006 09:35 AM | Link to this

Eric, find another blog…your over reaction to a wrong number has nothing to do with the topic and you obviously have too much time on your hands.

By Atlantaguy

September 26, 2006 09:38 AM | Link to this

Are you serious? Mother friendly? Its a friggin job…your kids are your personal life and choice…they have nothing to do with work. Kids are no more a valid excuse for missing work or getting special hours than just choosing to lay out. If you need to leave early because of your kid…fine, but take half a day vacation…can’t work the hours of the job because of your kid…fine…find antoher job. What has the PC world friggin come to? What happened to personal responsibility and not being accomidated by the world?

By bellamomma

September 26, 2006 09:39 AM | Link to this

pat you are exactly right. Co-worker bob doesn’t take his little johnny to the dentist or doctor. No his wife leaves her job to that. It is such a double standard. Many men today expect women to contribute and income. No biggy, except we are STILL demanded to be the sole caregivers to the fruit of his loins. I constantly fought with my hubby about this to the point that I quit my job. I told him he couldn’t have his cake and eat it too. I work part time now but the money I make is my spending money. And you can bet he hasn’t complained about helping with doctor duty since then!

By Atlantaguy

September 26, 2006 09:40 AM | Link to this

Are you serious? Mother friendly? Its a friggin job…your kids are your personal life and choice…they have nothing to do with work. Kids are no more a valid excuse for missing work or getting special hours than just choosing to lay out. If you need to leave early because of your kid…fine, but take half a day vacation…can’t work the hours of the job because of your kid…fine…find antoher job. What has the PC world friggin come to? What happened to personal responsibility and not being accomidated by the world?

By Childfree

September 26, 2006 09:50 AM | Link to this

I agree with Brian. I get tired of all the moms coming and going as they please, leaving those of us without kids to cover their work.

By Childfree

September 26, 2006 09:50 AM | Link to this

I agree with Brian. I get tired of all the moms coming and going as they please, leaving those of us without kids to cover their work.

By NoKidz

September 26, 2006 09:52 AM | Link to this

If you have kids with men who refuse to share domestic responsibility, then that’s your problem, not your co-workers.

You need to either check out potential sperm donors a little more, or put your foot down and quit being a doormat.

Good for you BellaMomma! Don’t shift crap onto your co-workers, go to the root of the problem…the guy who wants you to do the childcare plus work the same hours he does.

By bellamomma

September 26, 2006 09:54 AM | Link to this

atlanta guy just so you know alot of times when your co-workers with kids leave early that does come out of their sick or vacation time. Mine always did, because it was only fair.

i have never seen a single person say “I need to go to the doctor” or “my mom is sick I need a couple of days off” and been told no. The fact is most companies do offer the same type flexibility to everyone. you just have to ask. If you are valuble to the company they will do what it takes to work with you. If not, find another job! Oh, but “Fluffy/Fido has a cold” is not really a valid excuse.

At my old job we had singles leave early to “catch up on some sleep” or get their hair done etc. No one cares as long as it comes out of your sick time buddy! And I have noticed that people with out kids call in on Mondays a whole lot more often than parents.

By Temp

September 26, 2006 09:55 AM | Link to this

I swear, there is nothing more selfish or self absorbed than a woman who has pushed a squalling brat out between her legs. Everyone and everything should cater to you and the needs of your hideous little spawn. If you want the kids, don’t complain when I make more than you and get treated better than you by the company. I’m actually at my job every day and productive, unlike the women who decide that they can work part time but think they should be paid full time.

By Rosie

September 26, 2006 09:55 AM | Link to this

My company is very accommodating to the higher ups - three months paid maturnity leave, while staff only gets six weeks, and no leave for those of us who have adopted children. You would think with all the expenses involved in adoption that companies would at least offer some paid leave but most don’t - they offer family medical leave WHICH IS UNPAID TIME OFF! And they don’t offer staff part time, but they do offer it to upper management. At least make it equal.

By Temp

September 26, 2006 09:57 AM | Link to this

I swear, there is nothing more selfish or self absorbed than a woman who has pushed a squalling brat out between her legs. Everyone and everything should cater to you and the needs of your hideous little spawn. If you want the kids, don’t complain when I make more than you and get treated better than you by the company. I’m actually at my job every day and productive, unlike the women who decide that they can work part time but think they should be paid full time.

By mommyto2

September 26, 2006 10:01 AM | Link to this

How you spend your sick time is up to you. parents generally use theirs on the little ones.

when I worked I did leave early every day but I wasn’t paid for it. I made it clear that I needed that schedule and my boss agreed to it before I was ever hired. And when I quit, I stayed on part time for a month and a half to train my replacement.

if you don’t like the way your company is run, go start your own.But don’t hire ANYONE with kids!

By southernmommy

September 26, 2006 10:06 AM | Link to this

Temp: you too were someones hideous spawn once. Go screw yourself so we don’t have anymore of you! This is a parents blog dealing with parental topics. I am able to appreciate the non parents who offer a different view but DON’T insult I.E. “noKidz”.

I am sure there are some moms who do the things that you all are saying, but there are a lot who don’t and at the end of the day like someone else said “if you don’t like they way the company is run, start your own” because it is really up to the boss as to what the policy will be.

By AtlMom

September 26, 2006 10:08 AM | Link to this

Why are there so many “mommy” haters out there? Wow - did I really read: “…nothin more selfish that a woman who has pushed a squalling brat out between her legs…” What is selfish about that? That is one of the cruelest things I have ever read. Being a Mom, whether you have given birth to the child or adopted, is the most selfless act you will ever live. Clearly, you must have a poor relationship with your Mom, Temp. Sorry for that.

Let it be noted, I work full time, I am a mother to a wonderful 2 year old and when I have to work from home because my child is sick, I actually WORK. No one else has to cover me, but believe me, I cover for many others when they are out.

I am sorry to get off topic, but your rant, Temp, was cruel and way off base. I am sorry you live such a sad life.

By Childfree

September 26, 2006 10:10 AM | Link to this

@ mommyto2: Oh, if only it were that easy. Haven’t you heard of the federal laws in place barring discrimination in the workplace? Employers are not legally allowed to ask in interviews if a candidate had children, and they’re not allowed to not hire someone based on whether they have children.

By Childfree

September 26, 2006 10:13 AM | Link to this

I agree with Brian. I get tired of all the moms coming and going as they please, leaving those of us without kids to cover their work.

By bellamomma

September 26, 2006 10:14 AM | Link to this

Rosie, that sucks! You totally should get maternity leave when you adopt! That is so sad.

I have been reading a lot about mom’s starting their own business and we are really starting to take over the small business world. In my town there are almost more mom’s who own companies than men! it is awesome to see. I think family (all types not just kids) needs to become the focus of our society. The changes would be amazing!

NoKidz, I agree that people shouldn’t have kids of the kid is not going to be the center of THEIR universe. I hardly expect anyone else to revolve around my babies!

By mechelle

September 26, 2006 10:14 AM | Link to this

It is always mommy who does the bulk of the work, in the parenting, the marriage, hell at work. Men are so, so, self centered. And, unfortunately, they make the most money. And, many of their wives are at home with little becky and rusty. While the real working moms multi task, and work, take care of home, do after school activities, and still find the time to have sex with these useless bums

By Workingmotherof6

September 26, 2006 10:18 AM | Link to this

Pat Weaver, I was with you until “and our own poverty class - is popping out babies with gusto. But do you really think these teaming hordes will be the ones who create the next wave of new technologies, find cures for society’s ills, or even just have the means to consume the new high-end products of the future? No - those will be the children of the educated class…most of whom will, of necessity, come from families where moms must work”.

How ignorant. Who are you to say which children will accomplish what? How cynical of you. I bet you drive around with a fish on the back of your car too.

Anyway, workers should be cognizant of their family and/or personal responsibilities when choosing a position. I don’t think it’s fair to expect a company to continuously extend courtesies because of an employee’s personal circumstances if it impedes on the productivity of the company or becomes a burden to other co-workers. Situations beyond our control are going to arise. In those cases it is prudent for an employee to review and accommodate the needs of its most valued employees. But this is not something everyone in every position should expect. Having a family is a choice that most working mother’s make knowing full well of the culture of the work environment. We need to make this decision responsibly. If you happen to work for a company that is family/mom friendly, that is great! But if your company is not and does not offer flextime or work from home opportunities, you should look for a job that does or try to build up your support network (family, friend, church members and co-workers) that may be able to help out when the need arises. I must say in this economy where two incomes rule, companies would be wise to implement policies that would allow as many positions as possible the opportunity to telecommute and/or flextime. I also think the state should reward and offer incentives to companies that do this at an exceptional rate.

By lovely

September 26, 2006 10:19 AM | Link to this

The comments being made are indictive of what our nation has become. We are so quick to “put the job” first is it any wonder we are so screwed up. We put mom and dad in a home at the first sign of forgetfulness. We put our spouse after the job, the hobby, the kids etc. on our list of priorities and the we think buying Johnny that new bike, video game or car (which is why mom and dad are both working)is more important than being at his little league game.

By lovely

September 26, 2006 10:23 AM | Link to this

childfree: that was called sarcasim. I am afraid that parents who work out number the childless who work so that really wouldn’t work anyway! And yes I realize that but I also know that many companies ask those questions “just to get to know you” and you would have a difficult time proving that is why you didn’t get the job.

By William

September 26, 2006 10:23 AM | Link to this

U.S. citizens are the first to b*** about plant closings and outsourcing. But who can really blame upper management for making those decisions in a U.S. market as soft as it is now? We are spoiled and have a self-centered value system, from unrealistic union salary mandates to costly support of female employees who opt to give birth and then expect the company to step up and provide all of the answers to the demands of child bearing. If you want to work, work, if you are going to have children , have children. And if you are going try to do both, good luck!, but expect conflicts and compromise. Mother Friendly?

By William

September 26, 2006 10:24 AM | Link to this

U.S. citizens are the first to b*** about plant closings and outsourcing. But who can really blame upper management for making those decisions in a U.S. market as soft as it is now? We are spoiled and have a self-centered value system, from unrealistic union salary mandates to costly support of female employees who opt to give birth and then expect the company to step up and provide all of the answers to the demands of child bearing. If you want to work, work, if you are going to have children , have children. And if you are going try to do both, good luck!, but expect conflicts and compromise. Mother Friendly?

By mommyto2

September 26, 2006 10:25 AM | Link to this

childfree i was kidding! Jeesh!

Mechelle you are too funny!

By NoKidz

September 26, 2006 10:26 AM | Link to this

Pat Weaver is right…if a culture only values women (and girls) for their ability to breed, that’s at least 50% of the population that’s not going to be creating the next new wave of technology.

And yes, I have a fish on the back of my car. But he’s being eaten by the Flying Spagetti Monster.

By abc

September 26, 2006 10:28 AM | Link to this

Hm, how about pet owner friendly companies?

By Atlantaguy

September 26, 2006 10:31 AM | Link to this

OK…lemme throw this out there…single guy request a Friday off because he wants to go skiing. Same Friday a Mom asks off because her child has a school event. Only one can be off…who gets it?

By blogbully

September 26, 2006 10:33 AM | Link to this

this is a hot topic!! Mommies verses Childless people! Ok the Childless People will say some nasty things and really hurt the Mommies feelings but Ultimately my money is on the Mommies. Have you ever watched animal planet? Wow!

By To all insensitive people

September 26, 2006 10:36 AM | Link to this

I feel that there are a lot of insensitive people that have read this article. In our society today it’s hard enough to raise a child with moral values, and unfortunately the expenses to have a healthy and happy homelife involve both parents working. For those of you that CHOSE to not have kids or DON’T have kids, then you have no idea what it’s like to work and try to raise kids. How would you like us to all quit work and live off your taxes, I guess we could do that. I don’t see what the problem is with giving people time to care for and raise their children as long as their job gets done. I work for a wonderful company that takes each individual situation differently and we have the technology today that we can work from home and no-one has to pick up our slack. Never doubt a women, we’ll get it done!!!!!

By bellamomma

September 26, 2006 10:38 AM | Link to this

NoKidz I want to thank you. You are really contributing a different view to this blog in a very constructive way and I personally will take what you have said into consideration, should I ever be employed by a less family oriented company! I also completely agree with what you have said about the “breeder” mindset. As a mother to two girls and a boy I insist on teaching them that they are equal in ability.

I do have one question, what is the Flying Spagetti Monster?

By babygirl

September 26, 2006 10:39 AM | Link to this

It is obvious that those protesting about kids do not get heard at work, or do not have the guts to say what they feel at work. My bosses have the guts to say to those that do, if it is not involving you, butt out. You don’t like where you work or their policies, leave. That simple.

By southernmommy

September 26, 2006 10:40 AM | Link to this

Atlanta Guy~ Who asked first? That is only fair!

By william

September 26, 2006 10:40 AM | Link to this

How about jogger friendly companies? I choose to jog for exercise. Maybe I should ask my boss to allow me to take 3 afternoons a week off so that I can jog. They should provide me my shoes and singlets. If I get hurt jogging, I will ask, no I will demand that my boss pay my salary as well as any medical expenses I incur. While they do that I will expect them to be encouraging and supportive and if they are not I will report them to some obscure government agency. Jogmania unite!

By stayinvolved

September 26, 2006 10:41 AM | Link to this

Single Guy will get the day off because if he was a good worker he requested the day off in advance when he planned his trip and Mom will take a stack of work with her and work from home and everyone will hold hands and sing Kumbaya Monday morning. But that is only if Mr. Big Boss decides not to have a few cocktails during his 3 hour lunch and skip the rest of the day and go play golf with Mr. Big Little Boss.

By lalalady

September 26, 2006 10:43 AM | Link to this

Babygirl you have an awesome point. It is between the employee and the boss. Co-workers do have that right to chose what is an acceptable reason to miss work. Applause for your boss and you!

By scv

September 26, 2006 10:45 AM | Link to this

My employer, a large bank based in Charlotte (narrows it down some!), is incredibly WORKER friendly. So all these folks complaining that mothers get all the perks would get a fair shake here. There is maternity leave of 6 weeks, otherwise known as Short Term Disability (which all workers qualify for). If there is a C-section, then you get 2 more weeks seeing as it is a major surgery. Every employee gets 10 days a year that doesn’t carry over as Family Care Time. If your kid, spouse, partner, parent, etc is sick or even just has a doctor’s appointment, then you use this time and not vacation time to attend to the issue. Also, everyone gets 4 hours a month of community involvement time. This can be used for parents who want to attend whatever event at school or even just have lunch a few times a month with their kid, and the time is also for any volunteer work one wants to perform. So every employee has access to these benefits.

When we were transferred here for my husband’s job, they bent over backwards for me to set up and work remote, a situation that has worked very well for 3 years now. And I still am fairly compensated.

As for picking up the slack when parents are out for whatever reason, that’s not really a huge issue in our group. And we find that the working mothers are more efficient when they are here and it all evens out. Many (not all!) of the fathers whose wives are all home spend amazing amounts of time shooting the $$$$ and staying late for face time without getting as much done, because they have no need to hurry home and take care of any household issues. So I’ll put my 8 hours a day against some of these other guys’ 9 or 10 hours any time. (And for those nosy, I’m writing this while on a conference call)

Just as most times when one changes jobs/companies, I could easily jump ship and get another $15-20k a year but my company’s benefits and employee focus has earned my loyalty, and that is just what they are banking on.

By Pat Weaver

September 26, 2006 10:50 AM | Link to this

It is amazing, isn’t it, to see how this subject just brings out the venom in people. Women, particularly, are so hard on each other, and judgemental of the choices other women make. I say, “walk a mile in their shoes.” Yes, when I was single and “child free”, I’m sure I probably resented the occasional times when a mom would “get” to leave early to take care of a pressing family problem. What I didn’t understand in those days was the price - sometimes in money, sometimes in stress, sometimes in prestige and promotion opportunities - that she paid for that “privilege.” I didn’t know, nor did I care. So I’m not surprised or offended that many the single folks here feel the same. I get it…but I AM surprised by the level of rage many obviously feel.

If a single person is denied leave to take care of important medical or family issues, they aren’t being treated fairly either. And clearly, if someone continually creates more work for other staff without making up for it, that is a particular personnel problem that should be addressed by a manager. But if you’re ticked that you didn’t get to take off early Friday for Cabo because your co-worker’s kid had a 104 degree fever, sorry, I don’t feel your pain.

It’s astonishing, too to see how people leap to judgements about others on OTHER topics, based on how they feel on one specific topic…they draw an entire “picture in their heads” of who and what that person is and believes. What’s with the “fish on your car” deal? It’s humorous - I’m the last person you’d see with one - but would having one disqualify me from having a valid opinion? It’s also completely non-related. I’m merely pointing out that people who have many children indiscriminately - without considering consequences - almost always aren’t able to provide them tools for the future to help them be productive citizens. Of course there are exceptions. But let’s not pretend that they’re NOT exceptions. There will always be (thank god) kids who rise above their circumstances. And the “fish” comment was a fairly broad slander: I know thoughtful, intelligent people who have them, and boorish, closed-minded bigots who do too. Both call themselves “Christians,” so, let’s not bring religion into this. My whole point was this: right now, and until things change, working moms need a break now and then, not just for personal, “selfish” reasons, but so the next generation of people/citizens/consumers will be, hopefully, not completely screwed-up. Ond day, hopefully soon, men will share more in that burden. Then and only then, will businesses feel the need to provide that same kind of flexibility to all.

By NoKidz

September 26, 2006 10:51 AM | Link to this

You’re welcome, bellamomma. I try to put my point across in a constructive way. However, there are folks like “insensitive people” who think that…well, I’m being insensitive. Their own insensitivity towards co-workers is sitting like a beam in their eye. I had a mom who worked, and I don’t freak out every time another employee goes to a parent-teacher conference. But to ask me to shoulder the load of raising your kids, instead of asking the other 50% of their gene pool…insensitive. And kids do require sacrifice. The question is, who will do that? I think it should be shared, and that means among co-workers, SOMETIMES.

BTW, the Flying Spaghetti Monster is a deity, of sorts. Try a google search, you’ll think it’s hilarious. Unless you’re with the people who backed the Cobb County School Board, and then you’ll be outraged.

By Theresa

September 26, 2006 10:54 AM | Link to this

Hey guys — You have probably noticed the double postings — we do have a computer glitch — our fantastic team is fixing it now so we should be better the rest of day.

By southernmommy

September 26, 2006 10:57 AM | Link to this

SCV your job kicks a*! I am jealous!!!

By Sexione

September 26, 2006 10:58 AM | Link to this

abc…..funny you should say that. I used to work with a company that would allow certain employees time off for their sick dogs and cats, or to take them to the dr. Hell, they’ve even bring them into the office all day. And any time I needed to be out to take my child to the dr. or because she was sick, it was A BIG DEAL!!!!

Now, I work for a more family friendly company, but my co-worker (who by the way has no kids) is a SLACKER!!! She won’t do half the ish she’s supposed to do…I do dang near all the work for our area. So you best to believe, ANY time I NEED to be out for my child, I’M OUT!!! and yes, that time does come out of my PTO, but it’s supposed to!!!

By To all insensitive people

September 26, 2006 11:04 AM | Link to this

To jogger-I really feel bad for you. Why are you so unhappy. Obviously you don’t have children of your own, so you should have plenty of time to get out there and take a lap or two. Those of you who work places where your mommies in the office are coming and going so much maybe ya’ll should find a new job. I work in an office with 40 women, over half of whom are mothers and to be honest with you we cover each other’s backs if needed and help each other out. I’m glad I work in a FRIENDLY!!!! environment. I’d hate to know that if my son was sick I would need to go in so SOMEONE won’t harbor such anger at having to do my job.

By bellamomma

September 26, 2006 11:05 AM | Link to this

ok I am totally going to have to go pray after saying this but that is really funny. Ahhh I am so going to be punished for that one!

By stayinvolved

September 26, 2006 11:11 AM | Link to this

Sexione you bring up a great point. I dread the days I go into the office because of all the slackers that just want to stand around and drink coffee and visit the candy dishes. I can accomplish my work in 4 hours when it takes them 8. I want to get in and get out so I can get home to my REAL life. Fortunately my boss treats us like grown ups and watches our deadlines and quality of work vs. watching the clock.

Slackers are much more a problem in my workplace than mommies.

By To all insensitive people

September 26, 2006 11:14 AM | Link to this

To NoKidz you are being insensitive, but you can’t help it, until you’re in the position of having a family and having to put your priorities in order you’ll always be insensitive to some subjects. My boss’s wife is able to stay home and raise their 2 kids, so fortunately for us mothers we are appreciated and respected in the work place. If I ever need a new job do the world a favor and post a sign, “PARENTS NOT WELCOME.”

By southernmommy

September 26, 2006 11:14 AM | Link to this

the only crappy thing about my job with men was when I was breast feeding (this should get some angry posts) and there wasn’t really any place I could pump. So I sat in the bathroom for 20 minutes three times a day and I had my own cooler(putting breast milk in the break room fridge is just gross). Didn’t feel bad though because the guys do that couple of times a day. Just with a news paper not a breast pump.

By bellamomma

September 26, 2006 11:23 AM | Link to this

sorry, in sensitive but you are over reacting. All nokidz has asked is not to be abused because she (i am assuming) doesn’t have kids. It is not fair for her to always stay late on holidays with out being compensated. My co-workers always let the mothers leave early on Halloween to get the kids ready for trick or treating. In exchange we always covered for them the day after new years.

By lalalady

September 26, 2006 11:28 AM | Link to this

s**! I am the slacker and the mom!

By To all insensitive people

September 26, 2006 11:29 AM | Link to this

southernmommy you’re a riot. I like that one.

By Sexione

September 26, 2006 11:29 AM | Link to this

Of course, most of the child-less people are compassion-challenged, they have NO CLUE about parenthood. It’s seems as though until you are a parent (by birth or adoption or happenstance), certain things are just incomprehensible.

By William

September 26, 2006 11:30 AM | Link to this

The “jogger” has 3 children. Wife stopped working to raise them then went back to work when they started school.

By william

September 26, 2006 11:31 AM | Link to this

BTW, jogging was used as a metaphor, I’m sorry it went over your head.

By Sexione

September 26, 2006 11:33 AM | Link to this

lala…….LOL, u r too funny!!!

By CorporateWatch

September 26, 2006 11:33 AM | Link to this

If being mother-friendly involves making my wife travel 3 days out of every work week plus not filling vacant positions then her company is not making this list!!!

I am taking care of my 4 year old virtually alone. Corporate American 2006 really s u c k s!

By bellamomma

September 26, 2006 11:34 AM | Link to this

it is so not like me to take up for the non-breeders but here I am. A lot of childless people don’t understand what it is like to have responsibilty for anyone other than themselves and Fido. And as some of the other post have shown the can be stupidly mean about it but they aren’t all that way.

By Jen

September 26, 2006 11:35 AM | Link to this

Well this topic is perfect for my big soap box which is that there are not enough good part time jobs. When will society recognize the completely untapped workforce that is the stay at home mom? Many of these women with school aged children would work if they could get something that paid more that minimum wage and allowed them to use thier brains or education. If better part time options were available then you wouldn’t have women who have to work full time because they have to work, shifting their job duties on to the non-parents so that they can take care of their children’s urgent needs. Any FTE job should be able to be split into two part time jobs and more employers should consider doing it. I am so lucky to have the part time job I do getting paid $23 an hour and working 25 hours per week. If I have to leave early to care for a kid I can make up the work on weekends or an evening. The only thing that would make it better would be if I were able to telecommute. I am the only person with my company who has a job like this (we are a multi state company) so it is too bad, I can’t call my company mom friendly.

By To all insensitive people

September 26, 2006 11:36 AM | Link to this

bellamomma,there’s no over reacting here at all, it’s just frankly responding to something that is obviously more sensitive to those without children. Have ya’ll ever heard of the word “NO”. No-one said you had to pick up the slack for us working mothers who would love to get home and get our kids costumes on (since we’ve gone into Halloween) to get them in bed at a descent time. The company that I work for, let’s everyone leave on holidays early, not just parents. If that’s your companies policy, you might want to look into the discrimination act.

By southernmommy

September 26, 2006 11:40 AM | Link to this

Thanks! Has anyone else notice how most non-parents are really really bitter,gloomy angry people? I for one am glad they aren’t reproducing. Who needs that thorn in the a*? I will quit talking about my kids poopy diapers if you quit surfing for a Halloween costume for your cat! I am done for today boys and girls. I have to get back to work wink

By CorporateWatch

September 26, 2006 11:43 AM | Link to this

Wife put in over 50 hours of work at office last week alone.

She is expected to travel from VA to TX during the next month to cover territory.

She is also expected to cover 2 other positions due to vacancies.

All this and no 2006 bonus due to ‘poor company financial performance’

PRICELESS. Thanks GWB!

By Been There

September 26, 2006 11:43 AM | Link to this

Quote: The magazine ranks annually the top 100 employers based on five criteria: flexibility, leave time for new parents, child care, elder care and the number of women occupying top jobs. Here’s the story.

Yes, there are needs other than caring for children — and the companies were rated on that, as well.

By Sexione

September 26, 2006 11:44 AM | Link to this

NO, how about this one?…

The Slacker is the one that hogs ALL the time off the day before and after holidays. If the holiday is on a Monday, she has already asked for the previous Friday. She has snatched up the day after Thanksgiving, the week of Christmas (when the kids are out of school), and several other “prime” days. I know this could not have happened before I got here because then there would have been no one to do the work. So I’m thinking her greedy, lazy butt did this immediately upon my arrival….even knowing I have a child.

SO HOW’S THAT FOR BEING A NON-MOMMY SLACKER WHO LEAVES ALL THE WORK FOR MOMMY TO DO!!!!! (I’d better take a break…..this is NOT the post office!!!) LOL

By lalalady

September 26, 2006 11:45 AM | Link to this

thank you, thank you very much! (cheesy i know!)

Corporate Watch, gee it sucks to have to juggle a career and a kid. OH, wait now you know how working mothers feel!Sorry if that was mean!

By lalalady

September 26, 2006 11:49 AM | Link to this

oh yes blame the president! that makes since. How about stand up and take responsibility. Quit!!!! Find a new job! Un employment is at a new low so there are other jobs out there slick!

By bellamomma

September 26, 2006 11:53 AM | Link to this

A. That was not the company I USED TO WORK FOR’s policy (note the past tense used). We were expected to work unitl 5 regardless, this was just somethinggaspnice we did for each other.

B. Jen you are right. Stay at home moms are an untapped resource and we do need more part time jobs.

Stay at home moms are rapidly becoming a force in small business as OWNERS!

By babygirl

September 26, 2006 11:56 AM | Link to this

In regard to time off on holidays, its who asks first and gets it. I don’t think children at home should be the requirement for christmas. I have been in my job 28 years and have worked my share so I ask off and don’t give it another thought. First come first serve

By scv

September 26, 2006 11:59 AM | Link to this

southernmommy yes, it is a lucky situation. my company has been on the top 100 list for a few years now. and just for you, concerning your BF story, though our bigger corporate buildings have a “mothers room,” the small building where I am has no real option except for a few vacant offices with no locks. I found out that I got 2oz more each time using the adapter in my car vs the outlet in the office. So I spent those 20min 3x a day in my car in the corner of the parking lot to be more efficient. Problem was it drained my car battery as the end result and there went $100. Fun while it lasted.

By lalalady

September 26, 2006 12:04 PM | Link to this

sexione~here’s what you do. When the little twit leaves early or is even in the bathroom, get on her computer and send an email to the boss with a few choice words. the google for some porn and you should be clear of her soon! (this is only a joke and may or maynot work)

ps watch for cameras!

By southernmommy

September 26, 2006 12:08 PM | Link to this

haha! my pump didn’t have a car adapter! Boo! Of course my bathroom (again I am the only woman here) didn’t have an outlet either so for the first few weeks I used…. an extension cord. Boss finally stopped laughing and had an outlet installed! I really do love my job!

By Sexione

September 26, 2006 12:16 PM | Link to this

babygirl……it’s also about TEAMWORK!!!

My thing is, DON’T grin in my face like we are such a great team, and you know yo azz don’t do 1/8 of the work. DON’T grin in my face, and then hog up all the resources like you’re the only one in the damn dept. DON’T grin in my face, knowing you’re being a greedy *itch, and expect me to GRIN back, when you’re constantly being inconsiderate. I know that it’s first come, first serve. But I also know there are plenty of thoughtful people who will say, wait, I don’t just have to have that day, I was just taking it so I could spend the holidays with my DOGS!!! And it is done even in some other groups within this very same department right now!!!!

HELL, IT SHOULD BE THAT THE PERSON/PEOPLE THAT DO THE MAJORITY OF THE WORK GET FIRST PICK!!!!

By Sexione

September 26, 2006 12:19 PM | Link to this

lala….now that’s not a bad idea. The only problem - the Slacker is buddy, buddy with the boss. Hell, how else could she get away with being “the Slacker”?

On a much brighter note….that’s all about to change. There’s a new sheriff in town, and he’s not interested in all these little “cliques” and “friendships”. I can hardly wait for things to change.

By grown children

September 26, 2006 12:22 PM | Link to this

stayinvolved. please send me your company’s name and email address, so that I can send them my resume!!!!!! Sounds as though you work for a wonderful company.

I agree with ATLmom and southernmommy. That “Temp” person has a sad life. I really fill sorry for that person.

By mykidsdad

September 26, 2006 12:25 PM | Link to this

It seems that childless adults have a huge misconception about parenting. When a mom or dad has to leave work, it’s not always for soccer games, doctor visits and ballet recitals.

Parenting is a second job. Parents, especially with younger children, do not go home, crack open a beer and turn on the TV while the kids take care of themselves. They tend to nearly all their kids needs until the kids fall asleep. All this while trying to deal with any meltdowns, tantrums, misbehaving and general chaos that ensues until bedtime. Maybe then do parents get a break. But by then they’re just too tired to do anything except crawl into bed before starting all over at 6 a.m the next morning. And yet, there are some childless adults who call parents “selfish.”

If a childless adult saw what their parent co-workers had to deal with the minute they left the office, they might have a clearer picture of what it’s like to be a parent. That or they’d be really scared into never having kids.

By the way, ask any parent and they’ll tell you, despite the stress they go through, that having kids is the most amazing thing in the world, and all the trouble is worth it.

By SingleMom of 2

September 26, 2006 12:27 PM | Link to this

Wow! This subject has really hit home with many people. Ok I am a single mother of two children. (ages 3 and 4 1/2 yrs old). My youngest has Cerebal Palsy. I have lost two jobs in the past because I have had to miss days for him. I see some of you say not to work if you have that problem well gee lets see. If I don’t at least try to keep a job then I can’t support them at all. Lord knows their daddy isn’t going to do it. I don’t expect any special hours or special days I just expect to be treated fairly. If someone has to cover my shift then I am more than willing to repay the favor and do the same. And as far as MOST of the men that are blogging on here need to get a grip. Because you complain about women missing work but yet you are steady getting us pregnant. And I feel that ALL parents of small children, whether you are single or married need certain time off to take care of things but for the most part try to make it know ahead of time so that your shift is taken care of without putting it in someone elses hands. AND FOR THE PEOPLE WITHOUT KIDS ON HERE THAT ARE COMPLAING WELL SOMETIME YOU KNOW US PARENTS DO HAVE THINGS IN OUR LIFE THAT ARE UNEXPECTED. OH ITS CALLED LIFE SO I AM PRETTY SURE YOU DO TO. YOU DONT SEE US COMPLAINING TO COVER FOR YOU…. ANYHOW EVERYONE HAVE A BLESSED DAY!!! STOP ALL THE HATING…

By Sexione

September 26, 2006 12:31 PM | Link to this

AND on another bright note…..everybody knows she’s a SLACKER. Every one in the department knows, other depts. constantly praise ME for always taking care of them. And the bosses know as well, and you better believe it is being noted. She’s making herself look bad, and I don’t have to say or do anything (but my job, which I am paid to do anyway).

By babygirl

September 26, 2006 12:50 PM | Link to this

Its been my expereience that when someone is tooting their own horn, saying they do all the work, they really don’t. Those who work hard, usually keep their mouth shut, cause they don’t have time.

By Eric

September 26, 2006 01:07 PM | Link to this

Fortunately my wife works for a company based on California, where they actually treat women like human beings. With few exceptions (like Turner, Aflac, etc) Georgia companies treat women like second class citizens.

ALL Americas work too hard for too little anyway. Europeans are JUST as productive, but get more quality time off than Americans. We’ve been brainwashed into thinking working more is working smarter.

By Stinky Sullivan

September 26, 2006 01:11 PM | Link to this

You know 2 words for this blog…BIRTH CONTROL. See when I get with a woman i make DAMN sure she is on the pill. That way, I can hit it and quit it and get the hell on!

But then again, if you have seen how good-looking I am, you would understand why so many women would want me to be their “babydaddy.”

Winks at the ladies, sS

By lalalady

September 26, 2006 01:13 PM | Link to this

Quick sexione, check your slackers computer and see if she is really….BABYGIRL!

singlemomof2~wow. I am truly sorry you are having a hard time catching a much deserved break. May God bless you and your Little ones!

By To all insensitive people

September 26, 2006 01:21 PM | Link to this

dear Stinky, This is not a singl