MOMania

By Tee

March 6, 2006 09:44 AM | Link to this

I have four kids-10 yo B, 7 yo G and 5 yo twin B. Yes, They are a hand full! However what I had learned is that if I’m organized and prepared it can remove alot of the stress from my life. My husband is a truck driver and works long hours so I’m alone with them alot. One good thing about having alot of kids is that they will entertain themselves w/o a TV. Also the older ones will help with the little ones. It’s all about how you look at the situation. I don’t believe this life is for everyone because you have to live by an extreme budget…well at least we do since I stay at home. It was not worth it for me to work after the twins were born. I have my days I feel like walking out the door because of the noise and the constantly cleaning and laudry, but I love my “baseball team” and someday when they are all grown we can sit around and talk about the “good” time we have had together as a “big” family.

By l

March 6, 2006 09:46 AM | Link to this

I don’t have to worry about my two kids. Afterall, my mom, their grandma, is taking care of them while both me and my husband work. So, I don’t have to worry. I can drop in and my kids at anytime at grandma.

By Sherese

March 6, 2006 09:55 AM | Link to this

I have three kids—all 12 months apart—and people often ask me how I manage all of them. I find it a weird question because three kids don’t seem like a lot of children to me. I’m sure they are asking because they are close in age, but I know several women in the past that had 10 plus kids and they all are now wonderful adults. So, I never considered myself as having a lot of kids.

However, after experiencing the fun with three kids, I would like to have more. Having less than three seems so boring to me…especially if they are over two years apart. My kids play all day and rarely even think about a TV.

By Mom of 4

March 6, 2006 09:57 AM | Link to this

I have 4 children and was working full time. My mother helps out by watching the youngest (3yrs) throughout the day and being home when the other three get off of the school bus. Even though I make sure that I get them on the bus in the morning and return home within a hour after they return home, managing a family that size is hard working full time. I have now adjusted my schedule so that I might work part-time and try (emphasis on try) to keep up with the kids. Right now none of them are in any sports, just boyscouts. But I believe that if I was organized and prepared it would be a lot easier. My main problem has been with the organization. And it did not help that my oldest son (only 9) told his friend that we were not the most organized family out there. I guess the key is organization, but of course that is with any size family. But it hurts with a bigger one if you are not. The druging technique, I think would not be necessary. I look at the lady that has 16-17 children (yeah she is crazy) but their household runs like clock work. I did not see any drugs in their cabinet, of course they probably could not afford them either.

By Theresa

March 6, 2006 09:59 AM | Link to this

Sherese - How did you manage when they were babies — mine were two years apart and I would have one nursing while potty training the other — it was hard when he was a baby and she 2 — tell us your secrets!!

By fk

March 6, 2006 10:01 AM | Link to this

I am number eight of ten children. My husband is the third of six. We have one son, 15. That was not by choice, but just the way things turned out. My son exhausts me, mentally. Every subject is a debate. My parents simply did not have the time for a debate one on one, every day of the year. The answer was the answer, i.e., no meant no, and you had better not have asked the other once Mom or Dad said no. End of story. Cooperation was my dad’s big word. That is not to say there weren’t any debates. The dinner table was always very lively. Everyone put in their two cents worth. Dinner hour would run two and half hours some evenings. We all watched TV together. Everyone had to agree on a show, or get to the TV first. My brother and I were the channel changers since the remote had not yet made it to our house.

None of us had our own bedroom, so there were never any friends permitted upstairs. Many of us enjoyed going over to friends’ homes, but the friends always preferred coming to our home because of all of the activity. Individual birthdays were events. Milestones such as First Communion, Confirmation and Jr. & Sr. high school graduations were monumental events, not to mention college! The fondest of all childhood memories are at the beach, just 15 minutes from home. That is a tradition that carries on today. I think all of us agree on that, although the older siblings have different memories than the younger ones.

My parents enjoyed their time together. I do remember them going out, although not on a weekly basis. My mom did have a card group with other mothers in the neighborhood on Wednesday nights. They still do. My parents were able to make trips once the older children were mature enough to take care of the younger ones. There is a 22 year age span between the oldest and youngest. They started going away twice a year with a large group of aunts, uncles and friends when I was in high school.

The older siblings were far more responsible than children today of the respective ages. Everyone had a job…mow the lawn, pull in the clothes, fold the clothes, load the dishwasher, empty the dishwasher, set the table, clear the table, wash the pots, dry the pots, dust, vacuum (yuk) etc. The older children watched over the younger ones. Believe me, the older ones still enjoy “supervising”, even though 9 of the 10 of us are 40 and over…most of them are over 50. The pecking order never really changes.

The disadvantage of coming from a large family, and being one of the youngest, is that you really could never get away with anything. Eyes were everywhere. Either you ran into a sibling, or their friends. The first time I “snuck” into a bar, there was my brother, sitting on the first stool! Then one time I got proofed (carded), just days before my 18th birthday, and the bartender refused to serve me because he knew one of my two oldest brothers. Geez…you just never knew who you were going to run into! Life wasn’t fair with so many older siblings. The other serious social disadvantage was hand me down clothes. You had to get to the snow boots quickly, or you might be the one who wound up with the mismatched boots.

When they were children, my mother-in-law purchased tube socks for the three boys. Each boy had only one color stripe, e.g., the oldest always got the socks with the green stripes, my husband got the blue, and the youngest got whatever was left, either yellow or red. My mom stitched my brothers’ initials in the toes of their socks. My task was pairing up the socks with the right match and owner…not fun…four big brothers had lots of socks. Everyone had their own bath towel…color coded. If you wanted to change your color, you had to hope the person who had your desired color would soon go off to college, join the Marines or get married.

My parents encouraged each child to be a participant in social activities. At least one of them attended every Boy/Girl Scout function, football, basketball, baseball, softball, etc. game, with us younger ones it tow. They did the food shopping together on Saturday mornings, with two overloaded carts, and I can remember my younger brother and I going, too. My dad made it fun. There was a reward at the end, and you just never knew what it was going to be.

My mom was organized and ran a “tight ship”. She had busy days. You learned at an early age to pick up after yourself and to leave absolutely nothing in the livingroom, just in case someone dropped by. She did laundry every day of the year with the exception of Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter and Mother’s Day. She was officially “off duty” once dinner was on the table. I have fond memories of watching “The Mike Douglas Show” in the afternoons with her, on the TV in my parents’ bedroom. After dinner, was quiet time when my parents sat in the livingroom with the paper or Reader’s Digest. That’s when we got to spend down time with them. My dad was in charge of checking homework and baths. Education was a priority. Eight of the ten have college degrees, five have four year degrees, two have law degrees.

I don’t know why this one instance pops into my head, but I can recall my dad checking up on one of my older sisters. My sister was sixteen and going to a party. My dad did not really know this group of friends. Therefore, following my brothers’ evening little league games, we stopped at Carvel and then proceeded to the party address. So long as you lived at home, you had to let Mom & Dad know what the plans were. It was better to bring the new friends in and have them meet the parents.

I was about 6, my brothers were 12, 11 and 4. There were six sets of eyes in a big Dodge station wagon that took up more than half the width of the road, at least that’s how big it seemed when I first got my learner’s permit. Everyone knew the car. When we got to the street, there were teenagers everywhere, in the street and on the lawns. Uh-oh, even I knew my sister would be in trouble. It was like the parting of the Red Sea when those kids saw the car coming. Never did see my sister there, and by the time my dad navigated home, there she was, with her friends. They decided not to go to the party after all…hmmm.

My parents still live in the same house we all grew up in. They now have 22 grandchildren and two great grandchildren. Their house is still the center of activity. Every Friday night is “pizza night” and there is Sunday breakfast, too. Since six of my siblings live within 10 minutes of them, these weekly gatherings can bring anywhere from 12 to 30 plus people. My nephew even brings some friends from West Point whenever they get weekend passes. Sometimes, my brothers and their families who live about an hour away, come in for pizza or breakfast, too, especially if we out-of-towners are in. Sometimes, just their kids come in just for the sake of it, even if there is no “special company”. We get back to LI each summer and for Christmas just about every other year. Christmas is truly an event. All of the Long Islanders are there…including the adult grandchildren, with their families and significant others. Last year, the attendance topped 40+, and there were at least ten of us missing. It is an experience, to say the least.

We missed Christmas at “home” in 2005, so we’re taking a trip up over spring break. (I had an emotional breakdown while reading an opinion blog about two weeks ago). Looking forward to the chaos. It’s always great to see everyone. My son has many cousins. He’s lucky to know them, and he is aware of that fact. It’s awesome to see the cousins bond. He’ll never be alone in this world.

I’m glad I had the experience growing up that I did. Life was stressful at times, and money was tight, but in the end, the sacrifices were well worth the it. My parents enjoy having family around. They are never lonely. I think our son has a good understanding of what it is like to come from a large family even though he doesn’t have any siblings. Everyone is different…that’s what makes the world go ‘round. Imagine how boring it would be if we all came from the same mold.

I don’t think the number of children really makes a difference as to what kind of parent one becomes. Life becomes more of a balancing act with the addition of each new family member. Personality, character traits and flaws are what make parents who they are. The children are their gifts and contributions. Life is what you make of it, so make the best of it, and give each and every one of your kids a sense of family and traditions. There is no toy, car, house or gadget in the world can that can take the place of family and the sense of belonging.

By pklewis

March 6, 2006 10:04 AM | Link to this

Handling more than two kids is more about attitude than anything else. My wife and I have four kids and we are absolutely enjoying ourselves. I was an only child and I hated it. It actually seems tougher to have one or two kids to us (like the previous poster mentioned, especially if your kids are spaced far apart—more than two years).

Our kids like to play with the same things and enjoy the same entertainment options out there when we go on vacations. We don’t have to take one to preschool while the other one is on a baseball team. I say, the more the merrier…but don’t space them too far apart. Have a positive attitude and you can handle as many as God bless you with.

By Sherese

March 6, 2006 10:20 AM | Link to this

Theresa,

A poster has already mentioned one of the secrets: attitude. I don’t try to be a perfect mom and I think my kids love me for this. I focus on their health and teaching them good values. As I mentioned earlier, they are very active and rarely watch TV. They are very creative and amaze me with how well they use their imaginations.

Also, another secret is my husband and I also made an agreement that everything would be a team effort. We take turns giving baths, washing clothes, cleaning up the kitchen, watching the kids play outside and I thank God for him everyday. He’s a very involved dad and is always there when I need him. He wants more kids too!

By jennifer

March 6, 2006 10:21 AM | Link to this

I have three children and the first two are seventeen months apart. Therefore, I had diapers and bottles with both at the same time. How did I manage? Honestly, I cannot answer that in one word because there wasn’t a ‘secret’ to doing it, I just did what I needed to do to take care of them. Sure, they were a handful at times but so is one child at times.

When they were babies I found out my (now ex) mother in law was dosing them with Dimetap to get them to sleep and I was enraged. Never had I dosed my children to get them to sleep and that also quickly answered my question why I had so much trouble getting them to sleep after they would stay at her house. Who in the world does that to children? I can’t tell you how mad I was.

In the ‘old days’ I can see maybe grandma didn’t know any better because that’s how things were. Since then there have been numerous studies done that show this is obviously not an advantage to the children and people have stopped doing it for the most part.

I think everyone is different as far as how many kids are too many. For some people one child is enough, that would be my mother, and for others one isn’t enough. I do not think there is a general number that covers every household. However, I do think there is something to be said for having children close in age. Mine are 16, 14, and 11 (the middle one will be 15 in Aug. and the youngest will be 12 in Aug.)and it has worked out just fine for us.

By Susie

March 6, 2006 10:22 AM | Link to this

I have three of them, and have never considered doping my kids up to be able to manage them! If I couldn’t manage the first one, I would have decided that one was enough. If two was more than I could handle, I wouldn’t have had a third one. I surely wouldn’t have had a whole bunch of kids, just thinking, “well if it’s too much, I’ll just drug them till they grow up!” Just because something “used” to be ok doesn’t mean it was necessarily safe. The whole “our parents did it with us, and we are fine” mantra is not good enough, not NOW, when we KNOW better.

In the old days, people smoked and drank during pregnancy, fed their babies cereal in their bottles when they were a month old (!), thought that formula was “better” than nursing, didn’t even own a car seat, let alone use them, put their babies to sleep on their tummies(actually, that hasn’t been too long ago), but now we know that those things run from irresponsible to downright dangerous.

Someone from our grandparents generation can’t be blamed for listening to doctors advice back then, because doctors then didn’t have the knowledge that they do today. And any doctor who NOW thinks it’s ok to give a baby an opiate on a regular basis (not that Theresa’s doctor did that!) needs to have his license revoked.

By Theresa

March 6, 2006 11:16 AM | Link to this

hey Susie — I think we’re all in agreement that drugging a kid shouldn’t really be an option — so the questions becomes how do you manage more than 2 kids (when you have to go to a zone defense instead of man-to-man)—- what are the secrets, techniques - how do parents keep every child happy and give them the attention they need and still maintain their own sanity????

By tamara

March 6, 2006 11:30 AM | Link to this

Theresa, did you know that the Dr’s use to give pregnant moms speed pills to keep them from gaining weight? I like to fell over when my I learned that one.

By Theresa

March 6, 2006 11:35 AM | Link to this

that’s nuts -let’s give a fetus speed! - I don’t think my mom ever was on speed pills but i do know she dieted while pregnant with us — can you imagine — i’m totally about not eating ridiculous when you’re pregnant ( a did have to confess to the midwife a few incidents of eating icing out of a can wiht my second and a whole lot of sasauge buscuits wtih my first), but can you imagine dieting —- that would stink!

By Kelley

March 6, 2006 11:49 AM | Link to this

I have five children ages 8 to 17 (four were in diapers at the same time). Thank heaven for Prozac and wine or I would have definitely lost it on several occasions. The key is to stay organized - everyone has daily chores and is responsible for picking up after themselves - of course you have to learn to let go because you will never have a perfectly clean house. Now that the kids are older, things are much easier but can still get chaotic when trying to keep up with all the extracurricular activities - we have limited each child to two activities unless they can walk or ride their bikes to them. We did make the choice to live across the street from the schools the children attend to eliminate the bus/carpool hassle. The oldest pitches in and helps with the youngest but I have tried to keep that to a minimum - after all she is not the one who had the children.

By Kelley

March 6, 2006 11:49 AM | Link to this

I have five children ages 8 to 17 (four were in diapers at the same time). Thank heaven for Prozac and wine or I would have definitely lost it on several occasions. The key is to stay organized - everyone has daily chores and is responsible for picking up after themselves - of course you have to learn to let go because you will never have a perfectly clean house. Now that the kids are older, things are much easier but can still get chaotic when trying to keep up with all the extracurricular activities - we have limited each child to two activities unless they can walk or ride their bikes to them. We did make the choice to live across the street from the schools the children attend to eliminate the bus/carpool hassle. The oldest pitches in and helps with the youngest but I have tried to keep that to a minimum - after all she is not the one who had the children.

By Theresa

March 6, 2006 11:52 AM | Link to this

Guys — We’ve installed new software and I’m wondering with the double posts is it giving you some problem when you try to post? When I’ve posted this morning I’ve been sent to an error page each time but it’s actually posted my item — so i’m wondering if you guys are seeing the same effect — thanks, theresa

By Kelley

March 6, 2006 11:53 AM | Link to this

I have five children ages 8 to 17 (four were in diapers at the same time). Thank heaven for Prozac and wine or I would have definitely lost it on several occasions. The key is to stay organized - everyone has daily chores and is responsible for picking up after themselves - of course you have to learn to let go because you will never have a perfectly clean house. Now that the kids are older, things are much easier but can still get chaotic when trying to keep up with all the extracurricular activities - we have limited each child to two activities unless they can walk or ride their bikes to them. We did make the choice to live across the street from the schools the children attend to eliminate the bus/carpool hassle. The oldest pitches in and helps with the youngest but I have tried to keep that to a minimum - after all she is not the one who had the children.

By Kelley

March 6, 2006 11:54 AM | Link to this

Yep - triple posts as well.

By mary

March 6, 2006 11:56 AM | Link to this

I have 5 kids and have been a single mom for the last 7 years. My kids are now 21, 19, 17, 15 and 12….they are all honor students, involved in church and all-around great kids. Two are now in college and one is going in Aug. I am now reaping the emotional rewards of the work I put into them. I have friends with 6, 7, 8, 9 kids and they have turned out great and the parents have stayed sane. Key things to remember…. *once you have kids, that is your job….this nonsense of “Oh I just have to have MY time” is a totally new concept in the last few decades. Our parents never got their own time - it was work, family and household responsibilities. Then if time permitted, maybe. *My kids basically were raised without TV. Enough said. *You (the parents) are the boss. You should not abuse that position, but by the time your child is old enough to talk they should know that when you say no, you mean no. Furthermore, you should say yes whenver you can; learning when to say no is a very important concept. *My kids never had the bells and whistles that parents insist on now. I look at these enormous strollers and just shake my head wondering how my kids ever survived in umbrella strollers. It becomes a sort of child worship that I cannot comprehend. *Use the word “we” alot. Your kids need to understand that family is important in the big scheme of things. *Plan on never finishing the laundry and having tons of dishes and not getting the dusting done. Those things will be there when your kids are not. Having said that - it is a good thing for kids to be a part of the household chores. Doing a 10 minute pickup as a family every evening is a great trick. *When you do need that hour to nap or take a walk or sit in the backyard alone, tell your kids very honestly that they MUST leave you alone for a few minutes and they have the choice to be good or reap the consequences. I always gave my kids a choice….choose to obey or choose to receive consequences. *VERY IMPORTANT…make sure your kids are good readers. I cannot stress how important this is. Reading is their ticket to worlds beyond their imagination…..obviously - there are sometimes that kids have legitimate reasons not to be good readers - but there are alot of kids out there who just haven’t been correctly challenged in this area…… *if you find yourself alone with one child for a few minutes - MAKE IT A GOLDEN FEW MINUTES!! Talk, ask questions, tell a joke, something!! They will remember that - even if it is in the car running to the ball field or in the grocery store with your pre-schooler in the cart.
*deal directly with your kids - do not use manipulation….and if you need a book on that read the one called Boundaries. It is good for all forms of communication.
Ultimately your goal is to raise a functional, responsible, contributing member of society. With perseverance and consistency you can do it! And finally…..even if you are not of the Judeo-Christian faith, most of the principles you need to know about raising great kids can be found in the Scriptures.

By jamie e.

March 6, 2006 12:07 PM | Link to this

This is probably going to sound rude, but there are some people that I don’t think should be allowed to have kids, let alone half a dozen of them. Of course, this does not apply to most of the people reading this blog (or at least I don’t think so).

As far as dealing with a lot of kids, one of my friends has 3 of her own, 2 from her husband’s previous marriage, and any time I talk to her it sounds like half the neighborhood is over there too. Sure, it is loud, but so is my house with just me, my husband, and our two kids.

It seems she does a lot of outside activities (they live out in the country), sports, trips to the park, nature walks, plus a lot of arts and crafts. They love to put on a cd of fast paced music and just dance and be silly. Everyone has a good time, and also runs that energy level down. It helps that she is a stay at home mom (sort of, she takes college classes at night) and now her kids are getting older so she just has the afternoon to play and do homework before getting dinner started.

I think the best bet is to have a stable routine that consists of the basics (get up, meal times, nap times, bed times, homework times) but allow flexibility for times inbetween. The more structured it gets, the more confining it seems to a child, who is more likely to want to rebel against it or get “bored”. It also makes it more frustrating to the adult who can’t keep the kids in line too!!!

I think there is a point where after so many kids not every child receives adequate enough attention, although it is hard to pinpoint it specifically. My oldest loves to be the center of attention all the time and wants to hang around the adults. She seemed to lose her sense of independence when I had my youngest. My youngest will disappear for an hour here or there up to her room to play with her dollhouse until she has been gone long enough for me to think she is up to no good. :o)

I think a lot of the time issues can be handled by making a “date” with each child throughout the week or weekend and take them to do something you know they enjoy. My husband will take my oldest out for ice cream, or I will take her to a movie. My youngest likes to go “shopping” and I let her pick out a few cheap toys or we go get a snack somewhere. They both love the park and feeding the ducks, or getting to stay at home sit on my lap and watch a movie they got to pick out.

So, having a large family CAN be handled, but it all depends on the personalities involved. (sorry this was so long winded)

By Susie

March 6, 2006 12:26 PM | Link to this

Theresa, the secret is that you CAN’T keep everyone happy all the time. There is no rule that says that everyone has to be happy all the time. It’s enough if everyone is happy most* or the time, or a lot of the time. Once moms learn that, and subsequently the kids learn that their mothers weren’t put on this earth to make sure they were “happeeeeeeeeeee” every **second of their lives, things calm down substantially! Everyone’s life gets a little easier. Once I figured out that my kids wouldn’t be scarred for life if they didn’t have my uninterrupted, undivided attention at all times, my stress level dropped and they were more relaxed kids. So, the secret is…everything doesn’t have to be perfect! And the kids will be just FINE if not everything is perfect! YAY!

By Susie

March 6, 2006 12:28 PM | Link to this

Theresa I get the error page too, but if I hit the BACK button on my browser, it brings me back here and my message is posted…so if anyone gets the error message, hit “back” and see if your message posted before trying to submit again!

By Renee

March 6, 2006 12:37 PM | Link to this

I’m the 4th child of 4, married to the 5th child of 7. Husband’s mother is the baby of 6, my father the baby of 10, so I’d be nuts not to think big families are awesome! My mother is the youngest of 4, his father the oldest of 6.

I only had 2 due to financial circumstances plus surgery to repair uterine prolapse. I wish I could have had several more.

My MIL said she started her day by throwing a load of clothes in the wash and of course the kids all helped with meals and clean up. She said she would have loved to have more, but her body decided for her at 42 there’d be no more babies.

My mother was a nurse and hired out the housekeeping. I was stunned to learn years later she split her salary—half to herself, half to the maid/babysitter. That was in the day nurses weren’t paid nearly as well as they are now. She said she and my father both wanted 2 girls and 2 boys and that’s what they got.

For years my parents had a standing date night—they went dancing with my dad’s niece and her husband who were almost my dad’s age (child of his oldest sister). They made time for themselves as well they should.

I think larger sibling groups teach kids how to better interact, problem solve, cooperate etc. They often make for forever friends. My husband lunches several times a week with his brothers.

My parents are both deceased (I was 39) and it is comforting to have 3 siblings to share memories with.

For the person who shared that her children were born really close together—I worked with a woman who had a son, then 18 months lady, fraternal twins, a boy and a girl. She said the early years were hectic, almost a blur, but when they were in high school it was wonderful they attended many of the same functions—football games, dances, etc. It was good for accountability to parents, LOL, and watching out for one another.

By Renee

March 6, 2006 12:41 PM | Link to this

I meant 18 months later, not 18 months lady. Oops. LOL!

By jennifer

March 6, 2006 02:02 PM | Link to this

You can’t keep every child happy all of the time and if that is something you are looking to have happen then I wouldn’t have more than one child; and, even then that child is not going to be happy 100% of the time.

As far as fearing you will not be able to give your full attention to each child- you are right. You can’t give 100% of yourself to each child. However, as they get older they will have eachother to play with. Not that you shouldn’t do anything with them because they have a sibling, but having a sibling certainly helps with development and interaction with other children(I think). Don’t worry too much about if you are paying enough attention to each child. I think you will find that sometimes they like for mommy to leave them alone and let them do their thing.

By jennifer

March 6, 2006 02:03 PM | Link to this

Btw, yes, I have having difficulty posting today. Not so much multiple postings but after the post is sent through I get a This Page Cannot Be Found.

By tamara

March 6, 2006 03:04 PM | Link to this

I agree with Kelly that you should never expect your oldest to raise your youngest. That is plain out unfair to that teenager. Also, I noticed many blogger here depend on the grandparents for daycare or just drop in on the anytime care and I think that is unfair too. Your parents did their job when they raised you and your kids visits should be just that “visits” and them go home after. Hire a sitter and give your mom a break. How would you like it if you raised your kids only to turn around and have to raise the grandkids? Also, what are you going to do if something happens to that parent? I have a 2 yr. old granddaughter and as much as I love her, I will not babysit full time. I don’t want to step on anyones toes who’s parents actully want to keep your kids, but have you ever thought that they may only be doing it to please you?

By becca

March 6, 2006 03:15 PM | Link to this

I guess that mothers my age were so incompetent that the human race is now extinct. Some of you are acting as if we did things to our bodies when pregnant and children that we were trying to harm them. Do you really think that if we had had car seats that we wouldn’t have used them. If we had know about the effects of smoking and drinking on a fetus, we would not have done that. We followed doctors orders and child rearing ‘experts’ the same as some of you young ones. Of course, I guess that makes some of you feel superior.

By Susie

March 6, 2006 03:37 PM | Link to this

Good grief, Becca, we know that you did what the doctor said, which I said, in my past message.

The only people who are irresponsible are the ones who do those types of things NOW, when we know better. I am sure that some of the stuff we are being told is ok by OUR pediatricians will strike horror in young mothers 20 years from now, and they’ll all be wondering how our kids survived! Somehow each generation of kids survives, though, so it’s all good!

By Renee

March 6, 2006 03:55 PM | Link to this

Hee hee, Becca and Susie.

I recall being dosed with Pabizol with Paregoric by my grandmother. I’m sure it was for an ailment of some sort, not for convenience.

She also wrapped rags soaked with turpentine around my foot after I stepped on a rusty nail. When my mother saw some red streaking later, she asked about the wound and promptly sent me to the local health dept for a tetanus shot.

This was the early 1970s, I was about 10, I walked in the health dept., told them what my mama said and got the shot.

ROTFL!!!!

I turned out OK, really.

By Renee

March 6, 2006 04:05 PM | Link to this

To add a little more drama, but truthful drama, to the story, it was technically days after I stepped on the nail and I was limping terribly.

I don’t recall my mother being cross at all with her mother who lived with us. She knew my grandmother was trying to “doctor” me based on her knowledge, and based on my mother’s knowledge, I got a shot that took care of the problem.

Mom wasn’t one to panic. I think some modern moms would absolutely wig out on this one.

Tamara, I never really thought about it before, but my grandmother lived with us until I was 14 years old. My mother (may she RIP) never depended on Grannie to take care of us, but hired help to clean and cook. Grannie cooked, but it was because she wanted to, not because she was obligated. Often the hired help cooked. Both were wonderful cooks!

You made me realize yet another facet of my late mother’s thoughtfulness.

By SW

March 6, 2006 04:40 PM | Link to this

We raised four kids, each about 14 months apart and looking back it seemed to be a fairly well oiled machine. We had family issues and fights, nothing out of the ordinary. I just kept two of my grandkids ages ten and three years old, for the week-end and I am ready for a 10 day visit to a spa? How do yu all do it? My lord these kids wanted something every minute of the day and the idea of going out to play was equal to asking them to walk on air. They looked at me like I was crazy. Another week-end with them…and I would be.

By tamara

March 6, 2006 04:55 PM | Link to this

LOL SW, my point exactly. It’s time for you to enjoy life to it’s fullest and you cant do that by being tied down for the rest of your life. Love the grandkids & send them home..That’s the way to do it :) and Renee, sounds like we both had wonderful mothers. I miss mine every day. I’m just glad that I never depended on her to much for childcare. I know she would have done it but I didn’t want to make her feel obligated. Although she didn’t have many years on this earth at least she wasn’t stuck with a bunch of kids till her last days.

By abc

March 6, 2006 05:23 PM | Link to this

Yeah, SW, kids are different these days. In an effort to impose ‘old-world’ perspective on my kids I’ve curtailed or eliminated a few things that I feel contribute to their malaise (i.e. questionable sociability, apparent laziness, unable to function without some sort of passive entertainment). Video games are gone, TV is severely restricted, I stick a ball in their hands and push them out the door!

:-)

By shock

March 6, 2006 06:32 PM | Link to this

I am a mother of four kids.Im working on number five im only 25 years old and i need serious help my mother can only help on the weekend because she is enjoying herself because she had nine kids and eight stepkids.im wondering did i follow in her footsteps or what went wrong i love my kids to death but im so tired the ages are one,four,five,and seven im on scheduled but i dont have any help my husband is always sreaming i dont know how to take care a child my kids grandmother(mother in-law) stop keeping them when i decided for bedtime they should not have a drop of motrin when they stay with her all she could say was i did it for mine and they are all living so im scared of her and so are the kids my son came home and said grandmother is always giving us this sweet stuff when we come from outside so i asked her about it and thats what i was told.I said never again.

By tisa

March 6, 2006 07:07 PM | Link to this

Shock,

Did you say that you are working on number 5. I agree that children are a blessing, but if you are having these kind of problems at home with your husband and lack of assistance I would seriously recommend re-thinking number 5.

By Jesse's Girl

March 7, 2006 08:23 AM | Link to this

Oh goody…posting is still open!!! My husband and I have 3 children. Our oldest, a girl, is 9. The middle, also a girl is 7, and the youngest…”the boy” as we have lovingly labeled him…is 3. We thought we were done when the second girl was born, but the boy was coming ready or not! And it was most defintely meant to be. I would love to have more kids if I didn’t have to be pregnant. And unless the circumstances were extraordinary, I don’t see us adopting. So instead, we acquired a new dog and a mother-in-law. So when you think about it, we do have more kids! As far as the number of children….you do as well as your attitude allows. We have a couple in our neighborhood who have 8 kids! And just to keep things interesting, they homeschool them all! She has the patience of Job! But the love comes for most of us regardless of how many children we have. I would imagine that yes, organization helps greatly. Not to mention access to really good Pinot Noir!

By Susie

March 9, 2006 10:23 AM | Link to this

Um, Shock…if you are that overwhelmed, why on earth are you working on number 5?

By Susie

March 9, 2006 10:27 AM | Link to this

Hehe, JessiesGirl, I did the same thing you did, only the opposite…had two boys, that was ENOUGH, and then surprise(!) along came my girl. And like you I wouldn’t have it any other way. And I’d have some more kids myself, IF I didn’t have to birth them, and IF I didn’t have to work now, and IF I was 10 years younger, and IF IF IF IF! I didn’t even really mind pregnancy, I just know that nowdays my body would fall apart in pieces if I tried it. LOL!