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This week’s TV picks

Monday:
“The Bachelorette” 7 p.m., ABC:
Ashley is courted in a place in Thailand that sounds like the locale in a bawdy limerick, and that’s all I’m going to say about that.

Tuesday:
“Pretty Little Liars” 7 p.m., ABC Family:
Season 2 kicks off tonight.
“The Nine Lives of Chloe King” 8 p.m., ABC Family: Vampires? Werewolves? Pfft. As you might guess from the title of this series premiere, this drama’s about cat people (and not the crazy kind like that old lady down the street).
“Memphis Beat” 8 p.m., TNT: In the second season opener, Rice wants Whitehead to take the lieutenant’s exam. I’m not a cop like these guys are, but that sounds like stealing.
“Hawthorne” 9 p.m., TNT: Season 3 opens with Derek Luke guest-starring as Candy’s labor begins. I’m not sure what role Luke is playing, but I doubt it’s the baby.

Wednesday:
“An Animal Saved My Life” 7 p.m., NG Wild:
Okay, fine. But where was that sage squirrel when I plunked down thousands on that Betamax set-up back in the ‘70s?
“101 Gadgets That Changed the World” 8 p.m., History: I’ll bet Betamax isn’t in there.
“Top Chef Masters” 9 p.m., Bravo: Season 3 concludes with a four-course meal and a do-over.
“Through the Wormhole with Morgan Freeman” 9 p.m., Science: Do you think we’ll both fit?
“Toddlers & Tiaras” 9 p.m., TLC: Season 4 of this creepy show begins with a contest in Texas.
“Hot in Cleveland” 9 p.m., TV Land: New episodes find the gals in Amish country.
“Happily Divorced” 9:30 p.m., TV Land: Fran Drescher (“The Nanny”) stars as a florist in the premiere of this comedy based upon the end of her marriage with Peter Marc Jacobson, who co-produces.

Thursday:
“Naked Science” 7 p.m., National Geographic:
Really? Talk about budget cuts.

Friday:
“Flea Man” 7 p.m., NatGeo:
Prepare to be disappointed … this new series is about antiquing, not genetic mutation.
Vince’s possible suspension creates problems for Luke.
“Jamie Oliver’s Food Revolution” 8 p.m., ABC: Jamie Lee Curtis gives the chef an award. I hope it’s not a pallet of fibrous yogurt.
“Infomania” 8 p.m., Current: I guess there are worse manias to have.
“Paranormal Challenge” 8 p.m., Travel: Amateur ghost hunters? More like amateur potential victims.

Saturday:
“Outcasts” 8 p.m., BBC America:
Imported science fiction!
“Celebrity Ghost Stories” 8 p.m., Biography: More like celebrity ghost victims.
“The Inbetweeners” 10 p.m., BBC America: The final season begins tonight.
“Come Fly With Me” 10:30 p.m., BBC America: The debut of this airport mockumentary has to be funnier that “Wings” was, right?

Sunday:
“Daytime Emmy Awards” 7 p.m., CBS:
Shouldn’t this be airing at, like, 3 in the afternoon? Wayne Brady hosts.
“Drop Dead Diva” 8 p.m., Lifetime: Paula Abdul guest stars in the Season 3 kick-off.
“Falling Skies” 8 p.m., TNT: The much-anticipated Steven Spielberg-produced alien invasion drama premieres tonight. And while I wasn’t really thrilled by the first few episodes, at least they skipped all the plodding political machinations and got right to the action.

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