Austin360 blogs > Bottlecaps & Wingnuts > Archives > 2005 > December > 30
Friday, December 30, 2005
Thunday Night Foothball
“That’s the greatest play I’ve ever seen!”
Take a drink.
“That penalty was the worst ever!”
Take a drink.
Yes, kids, it’s the blog I’ve been wanting to write all football season: The ESPN Sunday Night Football Drinking Game. I know there’s only one Sunday night game left in the season, but since it’s the Cowboys (hopefully) competing for a playoff spot, better late than never.
Whenever commentator Joe Theismann uses a superlative (see above examples), take a drink.
Whenever Thiesmann whines about something (if you’re a beginner, you might try every other time), take a drink.
Whenever Thiesmann whines about something that happened more than a quarter ago (he does this), finish your drink.
When either Mike Patrick or Paul Maguire say something equivalent to “Shut up, Joe” (God bless them), take a drink.
Whenever the announcers are completely oblivious to what is actually happening on the field (the Pat Summerall memorial rule), take a drink.
For every multiple of five ESPN original programming commercials you see (DUTY! HONOR! COUNTRY! SIR!), take a drink.
Any time you see the same commercial twice in the same commercial break (I hate this), finish your drink.
Any time an announcer talks about a second-rate player as if he’s a Hall-of-Famer (“Boy, that Todd Bouman sure is going to be a great one for the Saints”), take a drink.
Every time the announcers jinx a player (“Brett Favre hasn’t thrown an interception in four quarters … oops, he just threw one”), finish two drinks.
Thanks for playing and Happy New Year.
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