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Sunday, June 4, 2006

In summation, the Braves really stink


Jeff Schultz

The day started with players from something called the World Softball League putting on a pre-game home run exhibition. For some reason, they used their own pitcher. They could’ve saved on travel costs and just borrowed Chris Reitsma.

Then the real game started. I think. These days it’s hard to tell the difference between the pros and the warm-up clowns. Maybe instead of running out for the start of the game, the Braves should just pile into a Volkswagen and drive onto the field.

“We all just stink,” Jeff Francoeur said Sunday.

Apparently, you don’t need to be a 10-year veteran to have perspective.

The Arizona Diamondbacks are good. They’re not Godzilla. But the Braves lost Sunday, 9-3, and got swept in a four-game series for the first time in 11 seasons.

They have lost six of seven on the homestand. They’ve led only once in the six losses (that was 1-0 in an 8-3 pounding by Los Angeles.)

The 1-6 stretch follows a 15-5 stretch, which followed a 12-18 start. Tonight is souvenir air sickness bag night.

“We all just stink,” sums things up nicely.

Include Jorge Sosa, who gave up home runs to lead off the first and second innings and is now 1-7 with a 5.07 ERA (after going 13-3 and 2.55 a year ago). Include almost the entire pitching staff, which allowed the Diamondbacks 26 runs, 42 hits and eight home runs in the last two days (three games). Include a lineup that Francoeur and Adam LaRoche says hasn’t started games aggressively enough. (LaRoche: “We got hot for a few games, and now it seems like we forgot what we’re here. I’m as much to blame as anybody.”)

They are now 1-6 against the Diamondbacks. The good news: They are 18-5 against the Marlins, Cubs, Nationals, Rockies and Padres. That should come in handy when they play, I dunno, Estonia.

Maybe we should’ve known this was coming. Last Wednesday, assistant general manager Dayton Moore left to run the worst team in baseball in Kansas City. This was big news for the Royals. They hadn’t been anybody’s preferred option for two decades.

The next day, John Schuerholz was stopped by Turner Field security as he attempted to walk toward the press elevator. She didn’t see his credential and didn’t recognize his face. Worst of all, she hadn’t read the book. Nor did she show up for Schuerholz’ book-signing before Sunday’s game (perhaps believing the title, “Built to Win,” was outdated.)

Friday was a good day. It rained.

On Saturday, the Braves got swept. Bobby Cox was ejected for the 121st time in his career. (He is only 10 behind all-time leader John McGraw. He is five wins behind Joe McCarthy for sixth on that list. At this rate, he’ll catch McGraw first.)

On Sunday, Sosa did his best to lose it before Cox had to go to the bullpen. Home run by Jeff DaVanon to open the game. Home run by Tony Clark to start the second. With two outs and two on later in the inning, pitching coach Roger McDowell walked to the mound. Whatever he said must have really worked. Sosa then threw a wild pitch to advance the runners and yielded a two-run single to DaVanon.

“It’s like we’re all waiting for something to happen,” Francoeur said. “We get down 5-0 or 6-0 before we start hitting.”

The lad is exaggerating. It was only 4-0. Then 5-1. Then 5-3.Then in came the lost Marx brother, Implodo.

Turns out that Reitsma not only can’t hold a lead, he can’t hold a two-run deficit. In the ninth, he allowed a single, a double and two home runs. The grounds crew swept up his remains and scooped them into an urn.

You tell yourself that a team could be worse than 28-29. The All-Star break is still five weeks away. But even Cox called this, “probably the worst series that we’ve ever had here.”

And the lines between pro and amateur are getting blurry.

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